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Need some advice about a guy

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 27 Replies
Me and my ex broke up about 7 months ago. He moved on right away and is already engaged. I was really hesitant to start dating again. A few months ago, I joined a dating site. Most of the guys on there were extremely creepy. Like wow lol. However, I did talk to a few ok guys. One of them I found super cute and we had a lot of common interests so I gave him my number. We texted back and forth for 3 months before we decided to meet last week.

Our first date was awesome and lasted hours. He seemed really into me and he made a lot of eye contact with me and yes, we did kiss. He told me he really liked me and would like to see me again. He did say we should take things slow because of our situations (we are both single full time parents). I agreed.

After going on the date, I haven't heard from him much. He texted me the next morning telling me to have a good day and he texted me later that night because he said his day was busy. He called me Sunday night to check in and it was a brief call. Yesterday, I didn't hear from him at all. I'm not sure what that means but I've been getting a lot of people telling me that he was just looking for sex, he's a liar, ect, etc. Its hard for me to trust because of what I went through with my ex. My guard is up and im hesistant. With that said, I just didn't get that vibe from him. I do admit I was a little concerned when I didn't hear from him yesterday. I started to think the worst. I mainly base these feelings on my experience from my past relationship. My ex wouldn't return my texts or calls for days and dissapear.

I know it's sometimes in our nature as women to over analyze things to death. I'm trying hard not to obsess over this situation but I'm so afraid I'm going to get burned. Does anyone have any advice they can share? Am I overacting or could this guy really be a jerk?
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 20, 2015 at 7:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Frances0923
by Silver Member on Jan. 20, 2015 at 8:40 AM
2 moms liked this
You can't get burned by a guy you aren't dating yet. I would continue to find someone else
ame4c
by Group Admin on Jan. 20, 2015 at 10:04 AM

 I think he's taking it slow like he said.  If he didn't want anything to do with you, he would have never called again after the date.  He can't be after only sex if you haven't given it to him yet and if you did you set that presidence in the relationship.

If he is a full time parent, he has a lot on his plate too.  Keep that in mind.

Meg2011425
by on Jan. 20, 2015 at 10:14 AM
I have the same situation currently. But I understand. Mines not that type to just not respond. He usually does but once in awhile he gets sick or his daughter, he also works third shift. And he deals with his exs drama. My point is there could be many thing as to why he's busy and can't respond. But you can always just keep looking because when he's ready he'll come back if that's what he really wants.
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wise.toes
by on Jan. 20, 2015 at 10:24 AM

did you sleep together too? if you slept together i'd write him off.

if you didn't, i'd assume he really is busy. if he doesn't get back to you in more than a day or two, i'd be curious as well.

it's tough, navigating through "text relationships" ..lol

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 20, 2015 at 10:25 AM
2 moms liked this
Continue to date others. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.
labrax
by on Jan. 20, 2015 at 2:17 PM

This.

Quoting faerie75: Continue to date others. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.


Callaly
by Jessica on Jan. 20, 2015 at 2:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Why not call him? Or text him? See whats up with him.

I think that if you are questioning yourself so much and this situation so much, then you aren't ready to date, even if your ex is dating does not mean you have to be ready, its OK


Elle.tea.22
by Bronze Member on Jan. 20, 2015 at 2:31 PM

You aren't exclusive.

Dating - you are going on dates with people you've talked to and dare/are comfortable to date. This is where you are right now.

Seeing someone - you aren't his girlfriend but you aren't going out on dates. You want this to go somewhere. You can choose to see someone even if they aren't seeing you.

Girlfriend - a commited relationship. Both parties agree to be exclusive. No other people.

Fiance - you've been in a relationship for a long time and have agreed to marry him

wife - married to him.


EarlGrayHot
by on Jan. 20, 2015 at 3:23 PM

It was one date.  You are reading too much into this.  But there was no committment on either part so why not join a dating website if you are that intent on dating?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 20, 2015 at 3:27 PM
Now I'm just thinking I'm not ready to date quite yet. Even though I am over my ex, I'm still not quite over what he did to me. It left me feeling really un sure and while I know not every guy is like him, I still have that negative experience in my head.

Quoting EarlGrayHot:

It was one date.  You are reading too much into this.  But there was no committment on either part so why not join a dating website if you are that intent on dating?

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