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Custody Hearing Advice

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies

If anyone could give advise to going to a custody hearing??

From everything I read it's all about the best interest in the child.

I don't want to say anything that's going to make me look like I'm jealous, or bitter towards my ex which I am no in no way, but somethings may come out and seem that way to another.

I know every state has it's own laws. Every judge is different as well.

My ex is looking to get full custody of my son who is 12.   We also have a daughter who is 14, which is NOT asking custody for.
There are many things to factor in here & I'm not going to go into detail other than I'm not an alcoholic, not a drugie or drug dealer, I don't abuse my children or leave them home alone.  I have a full time job, have a clean house in a good neighborhood with lots of support from my parents & close friends.

I'm really just looking for advise on what to expect going into this custody hearing.

Thank you all!

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 15, 2017 at 3:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Sep. 15, 2017 at 3:08 PM
Everything should be fine and hopefully you both end up sharing custody.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 15, 2017 at 3:15 PM

Right now our custody is pretty much 50/50.
He gets them 2x a week and every other weekend.

No reason to change something we've been doing for 7 years now.
The kids adjusted & do find with the schedule.

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Sep. 15, 2017 at 8:06 PM
Why is he asking for full custody of the son?

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Right now our custody is pretty much 50/50.He gets them 2x a week and every other weekend.

No reason to change something we've been doing for 7 years now.The kids adjusted & do find with the schedule.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 16, 2017 at 1:53 AM
Judges don't typically split up siblings so I'd take that approach when fighting this in court.
cjsmom1
by Group Admin on Sep. 16, 2017 at 8:01 AM
Why does your ex want to change the agreement? Since your kids are older they might the kids opinions into consideration
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 19, 2017 at 9:51 AM

I really don't know?
I've tried asking my son and all he has to say is his sister is mean to him.

He shuts right down and says he doesn't want to talk about it.  He says that dad told him not to worry about it and not to talk about it.

AzariahsMother
by Member on Sep. 19, 2017 at 10:23 AM

In my 17 years with Family court once custody has been establish it is VERY hard to get it over turned.  If he is requesting for full there must be a reason.  Without sharing that reason it's hard to give advice.  Generally the person requesting for custody change needs to prove why the other parent is unfit.  He will have to demonstrate why his home is better than your home.  Giving FACTS and having PROOF.   

Depending on the state your in they may ask your son what he wants.  Even if your son says he wants to live with dad that doesn't mean it will happen either.  Judges are looking for what is in the best interest for the child, so there could be increased visitation with dad.

Always wait your turn to speak, don't speak to dad, answer the questions fully, don't shout, no name calling, and present your FACTS and show PROOF. 

virginiamama71
by Carrie on Sep. 19, 2017 at 10:50 AM
Sounds like it's a waste of time to go to court over nothing.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

I really don't know?I've tried asking my son and all he has to say is his sister is mean to him.

He shuts right down and says he doesn't want to talk about it.  He says that dad told him not to worry about it and not to talk about it.

strawberrylibra
by Member on Sep. 22, 2017 at 10:54 AM

I mean the burden is on him to prove a significant change in circumstances. The judge is not going to seperate siblings because the sister is mean to him. Sounds to me like this is something that your son wants though. Maybe he wants it, maybe his dad coached him, who knows. He's old enough to decide for himself in court I think?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 25, 2017 at 10:04 AM
Most states will do 50/50 unless there is a really good reason it shouldn't be that way.
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