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Single Parent needs advice

Posted by on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:22 PM
  • 15 Replies
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I am a mother of a 9 month old baby boy. I am currently 8 months pregnant with my second child. The father is around,but I moved out due to lack of help on his behalf. I dont want to be bitter, I would like to be a family. Here's the thing, he says he can't handle another child at the moment. I just feel like when the baby arrives if he can't be a father to both, I don't want no dealings with him. Also, I've hidden this pregnancy from family. I'm ashamed that I'm in this alone.
Needs advice
by on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:41 PM
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Talk to your family.
grneyedormom
by Kendra on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:44 PM
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Talk to your family. Allow your body to heal after baby #2 is born. Be prepared to parent without him, as I suspect he won’t want to be a family. Develop a support system for you and your kiddos, you can do this! Come here to ask for lots of advice and support!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:45 PM
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Accept the fact that you will be doing everything on your own with out help from him. I hope you have family that will help support you
M4LG5
by Member on Nov. 25, 2017 at 12:50 PM
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This. Create a plan that would not involve him but absolutely make sure you get child support.

Quoting Anonymous 1: Accept the fact that you will be doing everything on your own with out help from him. I hope you have family that will help support you
Janice813
by on Nov. 25, 2017 at 1:10 PM
Thank you ladies for the reply. I know I can do it, I'm just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. This is all so sudden for me, since I had to stop college and become a mom. Feel as if nothing's going right. I'm sure family will support, but at the same time give me the you silly for getting pregnant a second time, if he's not helping with the first one. That's why I've hidden the pregnancy and being that the father don't want to take responsibility. So overwhelmed, don't want to fail my babies.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 25, 2017 at 2:08 PM
Was the 2nd one an accident? You don't owe your family an explanation. Try to look at it like a joyful thing and not so negatively. Everyday do something to try to make your life better. Do you have a stable home? If not apply for low income housing ASAP! Some of the waits on them are ridiculous so apply to surrounding areas too. In my home town I waited over a couple years so I decided to try a place an hour away and I got in with in a month. I don't have a job so my rent is only 4 dollars until I do find one. Oh yeah and GET CHILD SUPPORT!

Quoting Janice813: Thank you ladies for the reply. I know I can do it, I'm just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. This is all so sudden for me, since I had to stop college and become a mom. Feel as if nothing's going right. I'm sure family will support, but at the same time give me the you silly for getting pregnant a second time, if he's not helping with the first one. That's why I've hidden the pregnancy and being that the father don't want to take responsibility. So overwhelmed, don't want to fail my babies.
virginiamama71
by Carrie on Nov. 25, 2017 at 2:12 PM
Sometimes we learn the hard way. They know you best and it's better to have them than no one at all.
Keep the relationship good with your family and everything will be alright.


Quoting Janice813: Thank you ladies for the reply. I know I can do it, I'm just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. This is all so sudden for me, since I had to stop college and become a mom. Feel as if nothing's going right. I'm sure family will support, but at the same time give me the you silly for getting pregnant a second time, if he's not helping with the first one. That's why I've hidden the pregnancy and being that the father don't want to take responsibility. So overwhelmed, don't want to fail my babies.
M4LG5
by Member on Nov. 25, 2017 at 4:00 PM

Because you don't want to fail your babies....you WON'T fail your babies.  Know that every decsion you make may not be ideal but you are looking out for them because you love them. 

Quoting Janice813: Thank you ladies for the reply. I know I can do it, I'm just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. This is all so sudden for me, since I had to stop college and become a mom. Feel as if nothing's going right. I'm sure family will support, but at the same time give me the you silly for getting pregnant a second time, if he's not helping with the first one. That's why I've hidden the pregnancy and being that the father don't want to take responsibility. So overwhelmed, don't want to fail my babies.


Oliviasmom72
by Gold Member on Nov. 25, 2017 at 11:06 PM
Wow you got pregnant immediately. You need a support system. Please get on some birth control an focus on you and the babies. You need to tell your family you are pregnant. They are eventually going to find out. Who is going to support you and the babies? File for child support if he father will not help start figuring out a plan. You need stable living arrangements and an income.

Good luck.
amonkeymom
by Platinum Member on Nov. 27, 2017 at 6:43 PM

Congrats on your pregnancy and your little boy. 

You have nothing to be ashamed of, and you're not going to be able to hide your little one forever. I think you need to talk to your family, get their support. You'll feel much more able to do this and not feel so alone.

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