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Lack of child support....

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For 2 years now Ive been fighting my ex over his lack of paying child support. There is a court order through our divorce decree ordering him to pay monthly. He is currently behind $15,000.00. He pays 25.00 here & there AFTER promising to pay a specific amount (but not the ordered monthly amount). He promises to help with expenses then not only do I not get the help, he goes MIA for a couple weeks to avoid the subject. He just said last night after me confronting him, that hes trying his best. If he was a teen father he'd be doing his best but he is a 38 year old man. He job hops, does random jobs to just get by and helps his girlfriend pay her bills but cant man up & help with his kids financially. I also keep in touch with child support services. They are doing all they can as well. He moved to another state so they said they have to go through that state and it takes longer doing that. I know they are doing what they can, but Im still so frusterated and angry!! He makes damn sure he gets his weekends (when its convienant for him) but does absolutely nothing else. Oh except lying. He does do that very well. How do others deal with this?? I want to just not care & not let it get to me but I cant help it......:(

by on Dec. 3, 2017 at 12:03 AM
Replies (31-37):
mzhottie2581
by Member on Dec. 5, 2017 at 10:26 AM
1 mom liked this

Thank you! I will contact them today! :)


Quoting Linda_Runs:

Call your state level department of Family Services.  Their site seems well organized and well informed.  You might as well start with the organization themselves.

http://dfsweb.wyo.gov/child-support-enforcement

Quoting mzhottie2581:

Mine is Wyoming 

Quoting Linda_Runs:

I just checked.  Idaho has all types of interstate capabilities.  What is your state?

Quoting mzhottie2581:

I found it odd as well. Yes I do have an order now. Suppose to get 879.00 now with arrears and hes over 15,000.00 behind. Everytime they put in a work order, he changes jobs. The only thing Im looking forward to, is that usually this time of year he files unemployment so I get a little bit automatically for awhile. 

Quoting Linda_Runs:

That is odd that they would cancel it.  I don't think there is a state that doesn't have an interjurisdictional support order system with the other states.  I can tell you from personal experience that almost every state, if not every state, has an interjurisdictional support order enforcement system or policy with every Canadian provincial jurisdiction for child support.

To get a successful enforcement, the payor must be able to be identified, located and have a garnishable income.  There are enforcement tools as well such as fines, suspension of licences and even jail time.

Do you have a child support order now?

Quoting mzhottie2581:

Well, I have a cs case through child support services. Have had for 2 years, through our divorce decree since march 2017. He has been living in Idaho for 1 1/2 years. CS services originally started legal action against him but with him being in another state they cancelled it. They have tried to send him papers holding him in contempt but the last they told me was they kept getting them back because they couldnt verify an address for him through the post office. He dont have an address in his name. I did call them monday and updated them on where he's currently at. He's up for his license to be suspended but they said they have to go through idaho, although he doesnt have an idaho one. Im hoping they will catch up to him eventually but Im losing hope. Do you think it could help to contact cs services in idaho myself?

Quoting Linda_Runs:

I deal with this on a professional level actually.  What is the enforcement system like where you live?


alexsmommy51405
by Member on Dec. 6, 2017 at 8:53 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't deal with it. 

I've never expected child support from my ex and I was right to never expect it. He's a total douche. What's really insulting is that we can't refuse to let them see the kids even if they're SOOO behind in child support. Like here you go have your cake and eat it too. 

Recently, on Thanksgiving I allowed my ex to see the boys for a few hours, the youngest one was sick with a virus but I took him anyway. He doesn't get to be a dad only when it's conveinient for him and if the kid is sick and you want to see him you're going to take care of him too. 

Insulting the way they treat single moms in this country. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Dec. 8, 2017 at 6:47 AM
1 mom liked this
My ex is 49 with an MBA and doesn't have a dime to his name..he job hops, runs up credit card, and screws us other monthly...not to mention is a pathological liar..I feel your pain..keep pursuing him legally, that's what I'm doing.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Dec. 8, 2017 at 7:01 AM
1 mom liked this
Good luck. I've taken my ex to court for cs 5 times already. They've threatened over and over. He goes a few months without paying anything, makes promises, and won't pay anything until I push and push and threaten him with more court. Problem is, it ends up costing me money. He takes his visitation and acts like the best father in the world. Takes them out, excessively buys them junk and treats other kids around with pizza. Meanwhile I have to tell my kids we cannot afford extras because we have to pay for food and other bills.

He was hurt that I even enforced support through the courts because it meant I didn't trust him. Uh, no I don't. Then he quit his job and lost their health insurance. We went to court and they told me to get them on state insurance. Funny thing, if I went on trust and he did the same thing, the state would make me file through them for support to get the insurance anyways.
AzariahsMother
by Member on Dec. 8, 2017 at 1:23 PM

Why don't you file paperwork to find him in contempt of court?

mzhottie2581
by Member on Dec. 14, 2017 at 3:21 PM

Yea I do not agree with the laws of them not paying CS but we have to let them see the kids. Its like you signed the support papers and agreed and know you are responsible to pay X amout monthly but wont, dont get in trouble BUT if I refuse to let him have visits, I can get in big trouble. How is that at all fair. You said it right. They get their cake & eat it too....

Quoting alexsmommy51405:

I don't deal with it. 

I've never expected child support from my ex and I was right to never expect it. He's a total douche. What's really insulting is that we can't refuse to let them see the kids even if they're SOOO behind in child support. Like here you go have your cake and eat it too. 

Recently, on Thanksgiving I allowed my ex to see the boys for a few hours, the youngest one was sick with a virus but I took him anyway. He doesn't get to be a dad only when it's conveinient for him and if the kid is sick and you want to see him you're going to take care of him too. 

Insulting the way they treat single moms in this country. 



mzhottie2581
by Member on Dec. 14, 2017 at 3:23 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh I have...A few times. We have a coming up court hearing for it in March.  They dont seem to be real concerned with it. Makes me so mad!!

Quoting AzariahsMother:

Why don't you file paperwork to find him in contempt of court?


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