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Inappropriate messages from ex

Posted by on Feb. 2, 2018 at 10:50 AM
  • 5 Replies

Does anyone else have an ex that sends inappropriate messages? I've been divorced going on 6 years this April. We have 4 kids together (3 are still minors) so there's no way I can block him. Just yesterday he sent me a text basically asking me to come have sex with him. I replied "Are you serious? Totally inappropriate" & he apologized for asking something of me in his "moment of weakness" (his words). I really dispise this man & he thinks that he can get what he wants from me?! OH & I know it's not ME he wants... he wants his exGF who I am "friends" with (she has a child with him so we get along for the sake of the kids but we don't hang out together). And she told me the other day she had to block him again because he was sending HER similar texts!!! They broke up 4 years ago & he has been like this ever since... back & forth between us. If he's not sending her messages like that he sends them to me! I have told him in the past he is not allowed to text me unless it's about his parenting time or the kids' extra curricular activities.

by on Feb. 2, 2018 at 10:50 AM
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by Carrie on Feb. 2, 2018 at 10:56 AM
Only respond to messages about the children.
by Member on Feb. 2, 2018 at 11:01 AM
This month is 1 year anniversary of my divorce. When we initially split, there was some tension but then we settled down and started becoming great co-parents. I honestly believe he saw the our amicable relationship as us maybe getting back together. He text to see if we can go do something together. I was so confused. I thought he meant me, him and the kids. No...he meant just us. I told him that I don't want anything to would be us trying to be better co-parents.

Not that long after we were both at a mutual friends birthday party. We barely said anything to each other because we were both talking with different friends. He text me later that night and said I looked sexy and asked again if we can hang out. I said "let's talk about it later" because I had to get to wake up early for my daughter's soccer tournament and I didn't want to get into it right there.

Then he said "ok...can you send me a sexy pic?" Oh...mother effer!! I responded: "No...that is inappropriate and don't ask me again."

I honestly believe he was horny. I believe he had someone waiting for him after we split because he was suddenly "busy" but not too long after that, he seemed interested in me again.

I think most men need someone and can't be alone.

by on Feb. 2, 2018 at 11:24 AM

This is difficult. Kudos to you for standing your ground, l agree with virginiamama71, just ignore these messages. It sounds like you have already made it clear to him that this is unacceptable, I guess maybe if you ignore it he will just give up. Sorry you have to go through this, hopefully he will get the message. 

by on Feb. 2, 2018 at 11:42 AM

I think if you ignore the inappropriate messages he will start to lose interest and just stop sending them all together. I think he is just doing it to get a rise out of you. Respond to the ones you have to and delete the others.

by Group Admin on Feb. 2, 2018 at 4:18 PM
I agree with the ignoring advice here, but there is a point where this becomes harassment. If that is the case there are websites that help people with difficult divorces and communication. It's basically a website you both go to in order to communicate with each other. It's all tracked and recorded in case it's needed for court. Some people are so bad that they are court ordered to use one and not allowed to communicate in any other way. If you are at the harassment stage, this is what I would recommend. I don't remember any of the site names. Maybe one of the other moms will.
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