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What to do about a male role model (or lack of)

Posted by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 11:37 PM
  • 2 Replies
My daughter is almost six, and my ex-, who was never really involved with her on a daily basis even when we were married - almost never sees her. When he does, it's usually with his girlfriend so my little girl is "on show". She always comes back from her rare visit dishevelled and out of sorts. She said to me several times, "Why can't we go to a new daddy store and get a new daddy who's like all the other daddies?" -breaks my heart.

My family don't live in this country, and I worry about the lack of male role models in her life. I work full time and our afternoon care is female. Most of her teachers are female, and most of my friends through our church are female and/or single moms. I'm not dating and even if I was, I couldn't bring someone into her life so soon unless I knew it was really going to be something. Can you give me some advice as to how I can teach my child what it's like to have a strong and positive male influence in her life?

Thanks so much.
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 11:37 PM
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Replies (1-2):
MoniqueMarie
by on Jul. 28, 2007 at 11:01 AM
Well I totally feel for you and your daughter. I have two daughters and I wish their dad was more involved in their lives. These dads don't realize that these girls need their dads in their lives. My kids dads pops in and out their lives any time he feels the need. But do you have any brothers, uncles, or male friends. They should have a big-brother program in your area. You should check into that. But I only thing I can really say is keep talking to her as much as you can.


A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.




                                                                                                      Marie

Dizneymom
by on Jul. 28, 2007 at 12:39 PM
Im sorry that there isnt a male influence in her life right now, but have faith, it will change. I know it must be hard to deal with now, and I do agree that every child should have one, but I dont agree that it always has to be the father. My daughters father isnt involved, but she adores my dad and my brother, and they adore her.

At your church, do you maybe have a male pastor? Or how about in her sunday school? Are there any men there? Church would be a really great foundation for that. But, as important as it is, since it doesnt sound possible at this moment, maybe just try to re-inforce and encourage her that YOU are her influence. You are mom and dad. All you can do is be the best mother, and that will be enough for her. Im sure as time goes on, a man will enter your life. Stay strong!
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