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Visitation/CS ??

Posted by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 2:12 AM
  • 4 Replies
I have a question --for you mothers who have been through it with the whole child support and visitation thing...
I filed and the case was open as of 8-7, does anyone know about how long it will take for anything to start rolling on it? or when we will even be contacted? I called to ask and all they say is that is in the first phase right now. Usually I am pushy about things, but I just am going to ride this part out until we get to the finances part bc im not in dire need of it right now, ya know.
But I was just wondering.

And... If we decide something before we go to court or whatever for visitation and stuff, will that stand or will they still tell us the times and stuff to get him? I mean, i know they dont control it... but i was just wondering...

This is SOOOOO HARD for me!!!! I never thought we would be in this situation dealing with all this... it was supposed to work, ya know :(
I am not okay knowing that he will have my baby for a whole weekend at a time. I am not that trusting of him --and I want to know where he is and that he is eating, snacking, napping and all the details. But i know its not healthy for me to keep calling constantly either??

This is just SOOOO HARD and i feel like i dont know what to do or think about anything!!!!!!!!

  ~Love, Reva

by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 2:12 AM
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by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 3:16 AM
It all varies by location.  I am going through it right now in Michigan.  We are getting divorced but right now still live together.  All the paperwork has been filed.  I just have to let them know when we actually split up, then it goes into effect in about one week for the support.  Visitation is instant of course.  Also, we agreed completely on what we wanted for visits and support, and they accepted it just fine.  Of course, I don't know how it works if you don' t agree, or if they don't think your idea is good for the kids.  Hope this helps.  Feel free to chat with me sometime.
by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 4:14 AM
Hun..its your case..CALL CALL CALL!! you have the right to know what position your case is standing in, and you have the right to know when things will get moving. As far as not feeling comfortable with your child being alone with their father for an extended period of time..bring it up in the case. They will usually investigate any types of suspicions brought up but they will come to a decision with something that usually works for people. When i file for my Child Support, im telling the judge straight up, if Her father wants visitation..i refuse to let her go unsupervised with him until he shows proof of his AA meetings, proof of meeting with a therapist or counselor about his mental issues, and can prove that he is a fit parent for her.
Its our right to do whats good for our not feel like you have no say in it, because you have every voice in the world when it comes to your child.
by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 10:10 AM
Who did you file with? Did you get your own lawyer or go through DHR Child Support Services (that's what it is called here in Al)? I filed for child support through DHR (Dept. of Human Resources) over two years ago and have yet to receive a penny. I've heard that you have to call a lot with them to get them to actually take you case seriously. It's not something I'm really worried about though. Though, a little extra money every month would be nice. It's not worth my son's biological father having access to him. He walked away when I was 6 months pregnant. Though, I am curious as to why it has been this long. I mean, he still lives in the same city and works for the same company that he did three years ago. If I actually wanted child support and for the bf to be involved it would be extremely frustrating. 
If you're having issues about your baby being with his father for the weekend, bring it up in court. They might set up supervised visitation and make him take parenting classes... I hope this helped you out some... Hope everything works out for the best for you and your baby! 
by on Aug. 22, 2007 at 10:16 AM
That is your baby, and you have every right to call him 100 times an  hour if you need to.  Child support takes forever and 3/4 of the time im left fighting on the phone with those people and broke.  My child father is MIA and that is really for the best, even though I sued him for custody and got sole custody without a fight.  So im not sure how much trouble your childs father will give you.  And if you guys get something agreed on the courts will put that time in your custody agreement.  But from my experience once that agreement is made, its pretty much not enforcable.  They can not force him to see you're child, but if you interfere to much with him seeing the child they will fine you.  I'm really not impressed with the family court system, I really dont think they do that much for you or your child, other than if his father kidnaps him your custody agreement will be how you get your baby home.
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