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Opinions on whether or not you think this is okay…PIOG

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 6:13 PM
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Just wanted some people's thoughts on this:

About two months ago 2 little boys (between 10-12) knocked on my door, the older boy was carrying a broom and asked if I had any house cleaning he could do that I could pay him for, I said no, he left.  Since that time, the 2 boys have come by 3 more times as well as 2 little girls, who have come by 3 times asking "do you have any work you can pay me for?", we have told them no every single time as well as asked them not to come back...this past time (last Wednesday) when we told the girls no they asked if they could water our grass when they could clearly see our sprinklers were on then they asked us if we could give them a donation, my husband asked for what and they had no response, because there was no donation, they just wanted us to give them money.  Then they asked if they could have a drink of water from our hose so my husband went and got them each a bottle water and continued what he was doing (yard work) while the girls sat on their bikes in our driveway drinking the water...they then spit their gum in our drive way, which ended up on my 3yr olds shoe which ended up in my car and took 3 water guns from our neighbors front yard (the neighbors weren't home)...I sent out an e-mail in my neighborhood egroup because I think this is just wrong and another neighbor came forward and said these boys have asked for "donations" numerous times and each time she asks for what they tell her never mind...the "head" of the egroup is kind of brushing it off saying that he thinks it's great that local kids are making the effort to make some extra money by trying to find work in the neighborhood and yes what these kids did with the water guns wasn't right, but it's nice they are trying to make some extra money...

My thoughts are first it is hugely inappropriate for a child to be knocking on a strangers door (I have NO CLUE who these kids are or where they live) offering to clean the inside of their house, let alone for an adult to allow children they do not know into their house to clean...besides they could get hurt, they could take something or lie about something happening that didn't...I'd like to think that either of the latter wouldn't happen, but I don't know sometimes.  I also think it is down right wrong for these kids to be turning around and asking for fake donations and if I found out either of my kids was doing this I would be PISSED and so upset with my kids and feel that these kid's parents need to be made aware of the situation.  Plus it is disrespectful to spit gum in someone's driveway and wrong to take something that is not yours.  My "head" of neighborhood egroup is acting like I'm over reacting...

Thoughts?

**EDIT** These kids are not homeless, the girls are always on bikes and they are clean and wearing different clothes everyday and the boys are always on foot, but again clean…they may be poor I couldn’t say for sure, but definitely not homeless…I also found out last night (after NUMEROUS neighborhood e-mails) that my head of neighborhood knows who these kids are as well as where they live (border of our neighborhood, but not in our neighborhood) and is still giving the brush off…one of my other neighbors has said that she has frequently seen the boy in the 7-11 which is where he has asked her for “donations” for school supplies and when she has told me she has school supplies she can give him if it’s okay with his mom (she’s a daycare provider) he tells her no it’s okay, my mom will buy them for me.

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Siggy

I am a formula feeding (by choice), never co-sleeping, tummy sleeping, vaccinating, sleeping in their own room, time-out, CIO and spanking (when need be) believer, pro-induction (with Epi, of course), pro-choice , tattooed and pierced (and yes my daughter’s ear’s are pierced too), needs to lose some weight mama.
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 6:13 PM
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smilinghug
by Member on Aug. 26, 2009 at 11:36 AM

 The next time they come around demand that they take you to their parents house and go and talk to their parents. Tell their parents that their children are NOT to come knocking on your door anymore, and if they spit out their gum in your driveway again they will be forced to scrape it up. If it continues you could call the police (if you find out where they live) and tell them that these children are harassing you, they will then take it up with their parents.

I had 3 children do this 2 years ago right after I moved here and that's what I finally had to do they lived right across the street, but they were over here every day asking if they could do anything for $$. I always told them no and that the answer would ALWAYS be no, so not to come back. They would always come during my daughters nap and wake her up. I had enough, I went and talked to their parents and told them to have their children stop, they assured me they would. The next day they came back I called the police and since then they haven't come back.

Good luck,

 

Nicole080984
by Member on Aug. 26, 2009 at 1:10 PM

Do you know what the police could and/or would do?  I mean obviously they wouldn't arrest them, but do you know if this is something the police would handle?  I found out last night (after NUMEROUS back and forth neighborhood e-mails) that my "head" of neighborhood knows who these kids are and where they live (on the border of our neighborhood, but not in out neighborhood) and is pretty much giving me the brush off telling me he feels they are under privileged and just need love and parenting and direction and if we redirect them and possibly help show them the right things to do and offer in trying to make extra money that may fix the problem...if the kids are under privileged of course I would feel bad for them, but that doesn't excuse what they are doing and also doesn't make it any safer and I know I sound like a b*t*h, but it is not my job to love and parent these kids, especially if we don't know that they aren't getting this at home...I'm not going to assume these kids are not loved and show them "love and affection" if they have perfectly good parents at home, you know?  I know that makes me sound so mean, but I feel what these kids are doing is dangerous (if they knocked on the wrong door, etc) and feel their parents should be given the opportunity to take care of it because my "head" of neighborhood bans together to love and support these children...

 

 

 

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Siggy

I am a formula feeding (by choice), never co-sleeping, tummy sleeping, vaccinating, sleeping in their own room, time-out, CIO and spanking (when need be) believer, pro-induction (with Epi, of course), pro-choice , tattooed and pierced (and yes my daughter’s ear’s are pierced too), needs to lose some weight mama.
PrincessAdika
by Group Owner on Aug. 26, 2009 at 4:08 PM

I agree with Raquel, these kids need to know that you mean business and that Your not going to tolerate it any more. they are a nuisance, nothing you say to them from here on out is going to get  threw their think skulls!

The police will come out and talk to the children and their parents about the issues. No there is nothing legally that they will do but in my experience it is enough  for the kids and the parents to know that you are serious and not going to take it any more.

I would call the none emergency line to the police department explain that your family is being harassed and solicited on a daily basis and have the come out. I Had to do this because kids were throwing rocks at my house and they came out and put the kids in the car cuffed until their parents arrived to pick them up. That made enough of an impact on the kids that they have not been seen science.


Good luck on this one! I hope everything works for you!

PrincessAdika
by Group Owner on Aug. 26, 2009 at 11:47 PM

This just came to me...If your head of the homeowners association Wants everyone to give these kids a break so badly and to show them some love by giving them jobs and such. Why don't you point them in his direction and let him deal with them for a while and see if his tune changes after he See's whats really going on.

I would walk them to his front door and let him deal with it from there!


Just a thought

Windy

Nicole080984
by Member on Aug. 27, 2009 at 2:33 PM

Windy you’ve got me laughing as I read that because I told my husband that same thing…after I read “head’s” e-mail about how these kids just need love and yada yada, I looked at DH and said if that’s what he wants fine, next time they come here I will give them directions to his house! 

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Siggy

I am a formula feeding (by choice), never co-sleeping, tummy sleeping, vaccinating, sleeping in their own room, time-out, CIO and spanking (when need be) believer, pro-induction (with Epi, of course), pro-choice , tattooed and pierced (and yes my daughter’s ear’s are pierced too), needs to lose some weight mama.
smilinghug
by Member on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:30 AM

 So just a thought...but could it be that he is being so leanient because they are either HIS children, or they are family??? Just so you know most parents would NOT be okay with their children doing this! On that same token, it's possible (which is why I always recommend you contacting the parents first) that they don't even know. Then when you do address it, it could stop because they will deal with the rath of their parents. But if it doesn't then call the police. No they won't arrest them (unles there is harm being done), but like Windy said, having the police come to your door to tell you that your children are mis-behaved generally gets the message across!

Nicole080984
by Member on Aug. 28, 2009 at 5:42 PM

 No, def not his kids, I know his kids and they are both under 6...he's just "that" kind ofguy...he's super nice, but there are things he think's are "awesome" that other people would think were a little weird...apparently this is one of them...our neighborhood is pretty close knit and I get the feeling it's a mixture of A) he apparently thinks it's the most awesome thing in the world that kids are trying to make money by doing "odd" jobs and 2) I think he thinks our neighborhood is safe (which I feel it is as well) so the kids that are doing this are obviously safe as well...he's very big on this "being a community" stuff and feels if we come together as a community and yada yada then all will be fixed...well that doesn't change the fact that these kids stole someone else's kids toys and safe neighborhood or not, kids should not be knocking on strangers door and should not be offering the jobs they are offering, plain and simple...He has told me he knows where they live, but won't tell me the actual house, just general direction...and I highly doubt he will say anything to them...so I'm hoping he will tell me exactly where they live so I can talk to their parents or maybe he will deal with it directly althou I doubt the later will happen...if they come by again I'm going to ask where they live and AGAIN ask them not to come by...if Ican get out of them where they live, I'll talk to the parents myself, if I can't, I'm taking yours and Windy's suggestions and calling the non-ER number.

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Siggy

I am a formula feeding (by choice), never co-sleeping, tummy sleeping, vaccinating, sleeping in their own room, time-out, CIO and spanking (when need be) believer, pro-induction (with Epi, of course), pro-choice , tattooed and pierced (and yes my daughter’s ear’s are pierced too), needs to lose some weight mama.
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