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Posted by on Aug. 7, 2010 at 6:06 PM
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hello my name is cheryl and i live in pa..  we are raising 3 of our grandchildren since the day they were all born.. they all have the same mother...  they are 6, 5, and 20 months old.. we also have 5 children of our own, and still two of them live at home they are 22, 14...

we get no help from the childrens parents at all...  we struggle every week to make sure they have food,, clothing and a roof over their heads....  while their mom gets everything handed to her, plus gets help from the welfare department...

I am 44 and my Dh is 48, he is a work aholic, and i have been on disibility since 1991..we try our hardest to get by each day..  right now it's really hard as our daughter will havte her 14th b-day on the 23rd, plus we need to get school clothing for 3 of them... 

It really iritates me that we are struggling and the mother to them isn't...  but if it wasn't for us taking  them in who knows where they would be or who they would be with.... 

I know the good lord is with us and watching out for us all....

Cheryl

by on Aug. 7, 2010 at 6:06 PM
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Replies (1-4):
breezy2005
by Bronze Member on Aug. 7, 2010 at 7:35 PM

I know it's heart breaking and like you said if it was not for you where would the kids be. I don't know what to say really besides just hang in there and maybe some day things will get better. 

I do have to ask, how is the mother getting welfare and you have the kids. Is she saying to them that they live with her? If so I would be making a report and put in for some help for the kids to get welfare while the parents are gone after by them. Try and find out the laws in your state as well and see what kind of help you can get for the kids.

By the way Welcome to the group. We are always here when you need a friend to listen to you on your good and bad days as well.....

Angie 

GrandmaLinda254
by Member on Aug. 8, 2010 at 1:24 PM

Cheryl:  Are the children your daughter's or your son's? I am helping with my son's child.  My son is not married to my grandson's mother.  This makes for an interesting dynamic!  Still, I'm lucky I can be in my grandson's life, and I'm thankful for that.  My admiration goes out to you for the responsibility you have accepted.  It's hard to step in when our children can't or won't accept the consequences for their actions!

mmstacy24
by Group Owner on Aug. 9, 2010 at 10:08 AM

Welcome to the group Cherl. I did draw a check for my two grandbabies until one of their dads started paying child support. Check with your local chapter and see if you might be able to get something for the children. If not I would take the parents to court for child support. I could not imagine raising 5. I'm sorry it's so hard on you.

Michele

dholbert
by New Member on Aug. 11, 2010 at 11:38 AM

Cheryl, I can relate to your situation. I can't imagine raising three, but my husband and I are raising our granddaughter and have been since she was two weeks old. We struggle everyday like you to make sure she has what she needs. I work a full time job, but my husband does not work. He is in the process of getting disability. But it is a godsend that he is not working, b/c we could never afford daycare. So, we struggle by getting only the necessities in life. But that is all we need b/c we have the most beautiful, wonderful granddaughter. Her mom and dad are around, but they don't see her much and they haven't bonded with her. They are young and not responsible enough to be parents. We have guardianship of her, so we can get some benefits. We have WIC and Soonercare insurance. So this really helps. I don't understand how your daughter gets help from the welfare if she does not have the children. But I salute you, you are an extraordinary person to take on 3 grandchildren plus your own children. Keep trucking along b/c God will provide. Good luck. Keep us informed.

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