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Can a working mom be successful with 3 kids?

Posted by on Mar. 9, 2012 at 3:01 PM
  • 27 Replies

Hi! I am new to the group. I am a full time working mom who has two children that are the same sex. I would like to try for a 3rd (opposite sex - fingers crossed) but am having doubts about  "what a 3rd means". I am driven and love to work. I never felt like I was done with 2 children.  Some days, I can't imagine my life without trying for a 3rd. Other days, I think more than 2 would be too much.

Advice? Thanks, all! 

by on Mar. 9, 2012 at 3:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Marti123
by Platinum Member on Mar. 9, 2012 at 3:34 PM
1 mom liked this
Welcome!

I struggle all the time with that same decision! It is tough, as there are soooo many "what-ifs" you cannot plan for; I think you just have to make a personal decision whether to take a plunge off the cliff into the unknown.
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mamadear13
by Member on Mar. 9, 2012 at 3:40 PM

@Marti123  - Thanks  and Thanks so much for the reply....so what did you decide? :)

Ms.Pteranodon
by Member on Mar. 9, 2012 at 3:48 PM
1 mom liked this

While it's not the right time for me and my family, I think eventually we will try for another baby which will put us at 3 kids. Its possible you just have to plan accordingly.

Marti123
by Platinum Member on Mar. 9, 2012 at 4:20 PM
We haven't decided. We have not made permanent plans in either direction. I just keep taking things one day at a time. I know though, whichever decision I make, there will be a piece of me wondering if this was the best decision for our family. My mind and heart differ greatly!

May I ask, are you a younger parent or do you have more time constraints?


Quoting mamadear13:

@Marti123  - Thanks  and Thanks so much for the reply....so what did you decide? :)


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Loveplusmama
by Silver Member on Mar. 9, 2012 at 6:43 PM
2 moms liked this

I think you need ask yourself what you define as "successful?" And that definition is different for every working mom. I knew I was done after I had my second (but didn't know that while I was pregnant) so I think you have to make your own decisions. I know lots of working moms with 3 kids though, so it can be done!

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Mar. 10, 2012 at 10:52 AM

I'm a full time working mom and have 3 kiddos. I don't feel like having a third child changed much about the way we do/did things. Our routine changed some when he arrived but it wasn't drastic. Our children are older (18, 9 and 6) now so it seems like everything seems to flow better. 

twinplus2
by Member on Mar. 10, 2012 at 3:59 PM

Follow your heart. I too felt that I wasn't done with two. Then I was  blessed with identical twin girls. I choose to keep working and it does get a bit easier as the girls get older (my twins are now 4). But I will say that things aren't really set up for working moms with more than 2 kids. I get six days of "family sick" time which is good, but goes really fast when spread among 4 young children. The family tax credit is 5k, but my daycare costs are many multiples of that amount. Most cars fit 3 carseats across the back, but with 4 young children a minivan is a necessity.  That being said, I wouldn't change a thing. A full active house is a blessing.

Javamom00
by Member on Mar. 10, 2012 at 4:39 PM
Three kids a lot. I have thee boys. Your SO had to be by your side on it. I work many and early hours, the bonus checks make up for it, as long as u can maintain a quality of life
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mamadear13
by Member on Mar. 11, 2012 at 11:20 AM

Thank you everyone! As for age, I have some time (3 or 4 years)  before my age/body will make me call it quits, but I don't want to wait that long because I don't want to have a huge spread between the kids ages...right now, my first two are 3.5 years apart. My second just turned 3.  I have to make the decision this month or next. I wish I had a crystal ball...

Quoting Marti123:

We haven't decided. We have not made permanent plans in either direction. I just keep taking things one day at a time. I know though, whichever decision I make, there will be a piece of me wondering if this was the best decision for our family. My mind and heart differ greatly!

May I ask, are you a younger parent or do you have more time constraints?


Quoting mamadear13:

@Marti123  - Thanks  and Thanks so much for the reply....so what did you decide? :)



jbwd2012
by New Member on Mar. 24, 2012 at 10:21 AM

 I have 3 kids and work full time (with overtime on top of that).  It's hard, but I manage.  My opinion is that if you work full time, the only way to possibly be there enough for your kids is to be there all the time when not working.  I don't go the the gym, go out with friends, watch much tv, have hobbies, etc.  How could I work all day and then do any of that?  I guess what I am saying is that I have given up pretty much everything so that I don't have to give up time w/ my kids.  For now while they are young, this is how I manage.  I feel better knowing that I spend several hours of quality time every day with them, rather than spending my free time doing things for me.  It's frustrating sometimes, but I don't see another way as long as I am working.

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