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scheduling Christmas

Posted by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 3:31 PM
  • 7 Replies

I thought we had all of our Christmases scheduled, and pretty well too - meaning, that at each Christmas, we were going to be able to get almost everyone there.

Now, DH tells me that his ex wife will have his kids for the time we planned on doing Christmas with his parents. He then proceeds to tell me that the time we were planning on Christmas with my family, she will also have the kids. And THEN - he tells me he's not exactly sure of the older two boys' schedules anyway (1 home on college break, 1 coming home on leave from the Navy) so he doesn't know if the plans would work anyway.

THEN, my mom decides that we should change ours so that we can combine it with my dad's birthday party.

I'm thinking of running away. This is crazy! How can we make plans if we are trying to plan on people who we don't know what their schedules are, like the college and Navy boys?! GRRR..

Do you guys have this problem too?

by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 3:31 PM
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Replies (1-7):
deccaf
by Platinum Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 3:34 PM

Run!  Run far away!  Do it like some do for weddings!  Elope Christmas.  You have it with whoever is available, and tell everyone else later!

OK, that won't work, but I know how you feel.  We can only plan well due to the limited number of people we work around.

the3Rs
by Platinum Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 3:43 PM

Yup.  We have similar problems.  The folks we need to organize include my parents, my aunt & uncle, my DH's parents, my brother and his family (5), my 2 cousins and their families (3 each), my DH's brothers (no families) and of course the 5 of us.

Years ago, my brother made a decision that he would no longer celebrate Christmas on Christmas Day with anyone except his immediate family.  So - because he's, you know, god and all, the rest of the family did what he wanted.  So, I admit it's kind of nice just having the 5 of us on Christmas Day. 

We *used* to then all get together the weekend after...but of course that isn't working out for anyone this year.  My brother can't meet with any of us until JANUARY 12 unless it's on New Year's Eve Day.  But if it's NYE day it has to be EARLY not late.  (yes my brother rules the world).

Well, both DH & I work on NYE this year.  I wanted to do it later that day - bro said no.  So, Jan. 12th it is because my mom can't bear to disappoint him.

Of course, the rest of the family (aunt/uncle/cousins & their families) refuse to wait that long, so they're having their own Christmas without my parents or us the weekend after Christmas.

As for DH's side of the family, they're usually quite flexible as it's only 4 of them total, but this year we might not do anything because his mom is really sick.

:(

adamsmom0116
by Gold Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 4:07 PM

 Um, yeah. That sounds like my mess. We are trying to juggle DH's kids and their schedule with their mother, the 1 son's leave schedule, my parents, DH's parents. I wouldn't think it should be this hard. I'm sick of all the changing of plans, and I'm sick of trying to make plans around people who don't tell me what they already have planned so I can work around that......Thinking of taking Decca's suggesting and "eloping"   :)

Quoting the3Rs:

Yup.  We have similar problems.  The folks we need to organize include my parents, my aunt & uncle, my DH's parents, my brother and his family (5), my 2 cousins and their families (3 each), my DH's brothers (no families) and of course the 5 of us.

Years ago, my brother made a decision that he would no longer celebrate Christmas on Christmas Day with anyone except his immediate family.  So - because he's, you know, god and all, the rest of the family did what he wanted.  So, I admit it's kind of nice just having the 5 of us on Christmas Day. 

We *used* to then all get together the weekend after...but of course that isn't working out for anyone this year.  My brother can't meet with any of us until JANUARY 12 unless it's on New Year's Eve Day.  But if it's NYE day it has to be EARLY not late.  (yes my brother rules the world).

Well, both DH & I work on NYE this year.  I wanted to do it later that day - bro said no.  So, Jan. 12th it is because my mom can't bear to disappoint him.

Of course, the rest of the family (aunt/uncle/cousins & their families) refuse to wait that long, so they're having their own Christmas without my parents or us the weekend after Christmas.

As for DH's side of the family, they're usually quite flexible as it's only 4 of them total, but this year we might not do anything because his mom is really sick.

:(

 

cjsmom1
by Platinum Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 7:22 PM

I don't have this problem. My ex doesn't care about holidays so ds is always with me and the ex stops by to see ds open gifts and usually has dinner with us. Everyone comes to my house so there's no scheduling issues.

My frustraion is my mom is spending the night at my house so ds can open his gifts from her in the morning so she expects me to pick her up from work. Well my sister works nights and expects me to pick her up from work after dropping my mom off because buses won't be running. Then I have to pick my mom up from work at 4 so we can have dinner, then drive everyone home. I hate being the only one with a car and license.

trfgirl56701
by Melissa on Dec. 18, 2013 at 9:19 PM

I'm trying to figure ours out too. We're probably opening our gifts on Christmas Eve since I have to work both days and DH refuses to go to his parents on Christmas. The big issue is I have to work late on Christmas Eve. DH is off both nights but he will be sleeping his normal hours and isn't wanting to get up earlier to see DS open his gifts -grr- I am a little irritated that my in-laws are planning to open presents at 10 and then have lunch afterwards and I won't be there for it since I don't get off work until 3 :(

preacherskid
by Silver Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 10:56 PM

Everything is actually (knock on wood) going smoothly.  We have our friends on Sunday, my parents on Christmas Eve, our personal celebration Christmas in the morning, and the ILs at noon that day, my dad's side the evening of the 27th, and then my mom's side the 28th around noon.  I think it will all work out, barring weather and health issues.

leahbeah143
by Leah on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:47 PM

 thankfully no! Christmas will probably be laid back at home. The only thing we will have to schedule is when to do Christmas with my sister because she has to work that day.

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