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Advice Needed: Using the manners your teaching your children

Posted by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:34 AM
  • 17 Replies

In my household we expect our children to use Yes\No ma'am and sir when talking to us. Me and my husband believe if we want them to say it we should too. My family and friends find it strange when we are talking and we use these terms with one another.

example:  My husband and I went out to eat with friends and He asked me if I wanted a coke to drink before i went to the restroom. Without much thought I said Yes sir and walked off. My friend was very confused. "Does he make you talk to him like that?" "No but its respectful!"

Do you find this strange or out of the ordinary? If you do please tell me why. I want to hear feed back from both points of view

by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:34 AM
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Replies (1-10):
usmarinewife1
by New Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:35 AM

Let me say sorry for the Grammer mistakes. I really need to revives my post before sending them off.

Sorry

kay283
by New Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:38 AM

Honestly it does sound a bit strange. I wouldn't do it. It's too formal for family.

usmarinewife1
by New Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:42 AM

 

Quoting kay283:

Honestly it does sound a bit strange. I wouldn't do it. It's too formal for family.

 Thanks for your input!

usmarinewife1
by New Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 2:59 AM

BUMP!

deccaf
by Platinum Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 9:40 AM
1 mom liked this

I grew up in a military household.  Normal to me.  It helped me through boot camp.  And now we use it for Steph, too.  But mostly because it is expected at her karate class.

dmom27
by Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:21 PM
We do not use sir or ma'am very much at all. I never hear anyone use that anymore, so I haven't really made it a point to teach my boys. I am fanatical about please and thank-you, though. I am surprised how many children do not say "yes, please" or "no, thank-you.". I might introduce sir and ma'am when they are a little older...
Roo1234
by Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:29 PM
1 mom liked this
I think using sir and ma'am between two equals or familiars isn't appropriate. While it is a sign of respect, it negates the affection.

I see no problem with encouraging and role modeling manners. I would just choose to do so differently
usmarinewife1
by New Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:36 PM

 

Quoting Roo1234: I think using sir and ma'am between two equals or familiars isn't appropriate. While it is a sign of respect, it negates the affection.

I see no problem with encouraging and role modeling manners. I would just choose to do so differently

 I dont believe it affects out affection for each other at all. We dont say this to each other all the time. It just slipped out because thats what we are teaching our childern. If i said yeah or sure etc he would be fine with that comment as well.

cjsmom1
by Platinum Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:39 PM
I don't say maam or sir and don't expect d to. I have found those teens are typically used in thesouth and are much more common there. I do think it's an odd way to teach it just because those teens are typically used when speaking to your elders, not your peers.
Marti123
by Platinum Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 4:28 PM

I really do not view those terms as flattering or respectful. I am not in the military nor have I ever been. I strongly dislike the term ma'am as it means your old in the area where I grew up. 

I think there are many ways to teach respect and manners, those terms not included. 

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