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Need daycare ideas

Posted by on Apr. 9, 2014 at 1:42 PM
  • 19 Replies
We started ds2 in a home daycare 1 day a week about 5 weeks ago. Last week he went two days. This is the same dcp ds1 has and she's amazing. Today she told me ds2 really is not happy there (and he's a very happy baby). He fusses if carried,cries if put down, pushes ds1 away if she tries to work with ds1 to calm ds2. He's just generally miserable. She's giving us until the end of April but doesn't think it's a good idea for him to keep going. He's 10 months. Any ideas on how to make a 10 month old more comfortable?? Otherwise we will have to start looking for a nanny. If she can't handle him in a daycare setting, I truly believe no one can...
by on Apr. 9, 2014 at 1:42 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Marti123
by Platinum Member on Apr. 9, 2014 at 3:21 PM
My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he?

Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too.

I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO.

MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!
Nighttiger
by Ashley on Apr. 9, 2014 at 3:44 PM
This week and last week it is 2 days. DH is not willing to give him up more than that or to pay the money. I know 1 day isn't great but hes been there about 7 times now. I was hoping (and our dcp was too) that he would start to get more comfortable. I'm tempted to see ifshe would be ok with me hanging out there for a few hours two days next week to get him more comfortable. I don't want to confuse him but I also want him to know he's safe there and since he feels safe with me then maybe he will connect the two...

Quoting Marti123: My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he?

Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too.

I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO.

MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!
Nighttiger
by Ashley on Apr. 9, 2014 at 3:47 PM
Older brother was home whenever she was closed (so at least once a month) plus when school was out and every Monday and Wednesday at 1130. His preschool was 9 to 1130 m, w.

He's napping no worse or better than at home but she says he gets happier in the afternoons..



Quoting Marti123: My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he?

Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too.

I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO.

MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!
calsmom62
by Silver Member on Apr. 9, 2014 at 8:22 PM
1 mom liked this
In my previous life I was asst direct of a large child care ctr. We discouraged less than 3 days a week because the children didnt adjust well to the center otherwise. Babies need routine and continuity and one or two days a week isnt enough for him to build the pattern of. "mom drops me off , I have fun then she picks me up "".

Quoting Nighttiger: This week and last week it is 2 days. DH is not willing to give him up more than that or to pay the money. I know 1 day isn't great but hes been there about 7 times now. I was hoping (and our dcp was too) that he would start to get more comfortable. I'm tempted to see ifshe would be ok with me hanging out there for a few hours two days next week to get him more comfortable. I don't want to confuse him but I also want him to know he's safe there and since he feels safe with me then maybe he will connect the two...

Quoting Marti123: My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he?

Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too.

I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO.

MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!
Marti123
by Platinum Member on Apr. 9, 2014 at 11:29 PM

That's tough, would you have to pull your ODS out of his routine for the nanny. I know our budget was so tight, I could not afford both school for the older ones and a nany for the young one. Nanny searching was HArD, but your DH will be home, so that is an advantage! 

Another thought, maybe just pay for him to go for two to four solid 5 day weeks, so he can really bond and appreciate the caregiver, then back him off to 2 days a week again. Might be worth the investment in the long run. 

Quoting Nighttiger: This week and last week it is 2 days. DH is not willing to give him up more than that or to pay the money. I know 1 day isn't great but hes been there about 7 times now. I was hoping (and our dcp was too) that he would start to get more comfortable. I'm tempted to see ifshe would be ok with me hanging out there for a few hours two days next week to get him more comfortable. I don't want to confuse him but I also want him to know he's safe there and since he feels safe with me then maybe he will connect the two...
Quoting Marti123: My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he? Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too. I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO. MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!


Nighttiger
by Ashley on Apr. 10, 2014 at 12:25 AM
She also only has two days a week open. The plan was to move him to 4 days (shes closed mondays) when school got out and she could take him :(

To get a nanny will mean pulling ds1 out of his routine. We are break even cash flow now with ds1 in 2 days school, 3 days daycare and ds2 2 days care. To bump ds2 to 4 days will put us negative cash flow about $400 a month. So a nanny without pulling ds1 is out of the qyestion.

Add more complication in that my sister asked if we could help her kids this summer. Bigger argument for a nanny who can take 4 kids BUT her dh doesnt go for shift bid until may so she has no idea days yet.

Between this and everything at work..i want to cry!!


Quoting Marti123:

That's tough, would you have to pull your ODS out of his routine for the nanny. I know our budget was so tight, I could not afford both school for the older ones and a nany for the young one. Nanny searching was HArD, but your DH will be home, so that is an advantage! 

Another thought, maybe just pay for him to go for two to four solid 5 day weeks, so he can really bond and appreciate the caregiver, then back him off to 2 days a week again. Might be worth the investment in the long run. 

Quoting Nighttiger: This week and last week it is 2 days. DH is not willing to give him up more than that or to pay the money. I know 1 day isn't great but hes been there about 7 times now. I was hoping (and our dcp was too) that he would start to get more comfortable. I'm tempted to see ifshe would be ok with me hanging out there for a few hours two days next week to get him more comfortable. I don't want to confuse him but I also want him to know he's safe there and since he feels safe with me then maybe he will connect the two...

Quoting Marti123: My first reaction is, 1 day a week? My only thought, my babies and toddlers thrived more on routine, and he is not feeling any, just this weird & out of sync day with this stranger daycare worker and his older brother sans parents, and older bro wasn't at home previously during his days, was he?

Is he napping? Getting over-fatigued could cause issues too.

I just think he needs more time and he will adjust to any environment, IMO.

MaeLena is struggling with transition too, but it is getting better. I hope you find something that works for him!

cubbies23
by Member on Apr. 10, 2014 at 9:30 AM

I am a home daycare provider. From experiences one day a week is very hard on any child to adjust to a new enviroment. If possible I would try to send him at least 3 days a week. I would not be able to let you stay at the house for a few hours to help with him. You would need to have all the paperwork from the state filled out. I think it would be harder for your son to adjust. You also need to think about the other kids and if it would be a disruption for them.   If you can't add more days then a nanny maybe your only option.

Nighttiger
by Ashley on Apr. 10, 2014 at 9:52 AM
We cant add more days due to the dcp schedule. We just moved our oldest from thurs to wed to open a thurs spot for the younger. Still only 2 days though. :(

Quoting cubbies23:

I am a home daycare provider. From experiences one day a week is very hard on any child to adjust to a new enviroment. If possible I would try to send him at least 3 days a week. I would not be able to let you stay at the house for a few hours to help with him. You would need to have all the paperwork from the state filled out. I think it would be harder for your son to adjust. You also need to think about the other kids and if it would be a disruption for them.   If you can't add more days then a nanny maybe your only option.

Marti123
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2014 at 10:18 AM
2 moms liked this

 *hugs* ahh, well, just focus on the moment then for now. That's all you can do. Majority of days, baby is with father, he is healthy & happy. And even on his grumpier days, his basic needs are met. At the end of April, you can pull DS2 out if things continue as they are, as your husband's shcedule is flexible. Then you can hang tight until your sister's DH finds out when the nanny will be necessary. Then you can start the hunt for nannies, but just focus on today. If you look at all the "what ifs" and "when will I know" it does drive you batty, trust me, I know.

Quoting Nighttiger: She also only has two days a week open. The plan was to move him to 4 days (shes closed mondays) when school got out and she could take him :( To get a nanny will mean pulling ds1 out of his routine. We are break even cash flow now with ds1 in 2 days school, 3 days daycare and ds2 2 days care. To bump ds2 to 4 days will put us negative cash flow about $400 a month. So a nanny without pulling ds1 is out of the qyestion. Add more complication in that my sister asked if we could help her kids this summer. Bigger argument for a nanny who can take 4 kids BUT her dh doesnt go for shift bid until may so she has no idea days yet. Between this and everything at work..i want to cry!!

 

Marti123
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2014 at 10:20 AM

 I actually would opted not to use a home provider once, when she told me I could not visit for long periods of time. I saw it as a red flag, I had no idea it was a state legal thing. My franchised daycare settings lets me stay any time or any day I wish. Wonder why the difference?

Quoting cubbies23:

I am a home daycare provider. From experiences one day a week is very hard on any child to adjust to a new enviroment. If possible I would try to send him at least 3 days a week. I would not be able to let you stay at the house for a few hours to help with him. You would need to have all the paperwork from the state filled out. I think it would be harder for your son to adjust. You also need to think about the other kids and if it would be a disruption for them.   If you can't add more days then a nanny maybe your only option.

 

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