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Working Moms Working Moms

I'm not trying to do it all but what I do feels like it's not enough

Posted by on May. 7, 2014 at 12:55 PM
  • 2 Replies

I work full-time as a college advisor for an AMAZING program that supports college students that were in foster care.  It's so great to be part of this and know the students.  In order to make this program successful and thrive (maybe even get donations for scholarships), I need to do more.  I need to show the need, the success, and do a lot of work to outreach for donations....which this is something that I've never really done.  It's a lot of work and due to the work, I was supposed to be classified higher but there seems to always be something holding it back from happening.  On top of this, I really need more staffing.  I cannot do this all.

On top of this, I coach youth sports.  It's my passion and I love it but this year has been particularly hard.  My husband usually coaches our twins (just turned 8) and I usually coach my 10 year old's teams and we help each other when we can but since he is now a vice principal, he doesn't have time.  There are not many good coaches in our league and since I've played softball through college and coached at all levels from 3 years old - college, I decided to take on their team as well.  I've been able to manage it really well and there are very few days that it conflicts.  Sure it's tiring and my only day offs are Mondays most of the time but I'm enjoying myself except when I deal with the adults.  The problem is the other coaches.  I have 2 male coaches that rarely show up to practices so I'm doing most of the work by myself and then will criticize the hell out of me and my coaching though they never really played this game before.  One doesn't know softball AT ALL but he is like the other coach's puppet and whatever he says, this guy does so it's quite difficult.  I have a great female assistant coach for my 8U team but when my husband comes out (mainly to games) he tries to take over and then ends up doing things that I don't want the girls to do.  When I ask tell him that isn't what i'm doing, he rolls his eyes and huffs and puffs and talks under his breath....yes, people are seeing this.  So, i am trying to coach and have to deal with an immature butthead. 

I continue to try and make it fun as much as I can and view myself as a pretty good, knowledgeable coach.  Many of my past players have said they had the best year with me YET......the males coaches that I've been working with this year try to take over even though they are not there half the time.  I've been persistent at what i'm coaching and maintaining what I'm doing but they make it sound negative.....probably because I'm a female coach. 

It's interesting that when male coaches talk, people listen.  When female coaches talk, they are questioned and have to prove their knowledge.

Anyway, I'm stressed and don't feel very good right now.  I don't feel appreciated for my efforts.  I just needed to vent.

by on May. 7, 2014 at 12:55 PM
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Replies (1-2):
calsmom62
by Silver Member on May. 7, 2014 at 8:46 PM
Hugs!!!!!!! you are amazing. Id have a meeting with your asst male jerks i mean coaches and lay it out. that its a team of kids and you all serve as mentors. and out in the field if they disagree with you save it for later and you all can discuss it.
Marti123
by Platinum Member on May. 7, 2014 at 11:42 PM

What a bunch a a-holes. I mean just how big if balls do they have, criticizing when they bother showing up to help! I bet you are an awesome coach, stand your ground, bluntly tell them, "hey, you weren't at the last 3 practices to voice your opinion, so I would appreciate, if you could support all the decisions *I* have made.

i have remember your job situation being like this a year or so ago to. Our school has a whole person dedicated to go out find us money! I know it's tough! 

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