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So I just realized

Posted by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:41 PM
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My adoption agency was nice to me until after my surrenders were up, then they became really rude. Any one else had this happen? Can I do anything about it?

by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
vampporcupine
by Silver Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:56 PM
They got what they wanted, your baby, and now they have no use for you. Yes, this happens to many mothers with many different agencies.

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MommieBre21
by Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:06 PM


And there isn't any thing I can do about it is there?

Quoting vampporcupine:

They got what they wanted, your baby, and now they have no use for you. Yes, this happens to many mothers with many different agencies.



PortAngeles1969
by Group Admin on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:28 PM
Very common! Their primary customer is the adoptive family - matching. Once this is accomplished the next "match" becomes the highest priority.

If they are supposed to offer you follow-up services and counseling they do need to follow through with that.

Is there something specific you are asking for and not getting an acceptable response to? We could offer better advice if you are willing to share.

I'm so sorry they do this - it's a loss upon a loss and at a time that you feel so weak. I remember it well and that was 22 years ago
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vampporcupine
by Silver Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:29 PM
Nope. I'm sorry but it is the reality of adoption. Your baby was the commodity that they wined and dined you for so they could turn a profit.

My daughters adoption apparently didn't have an agency (long story). Anyways, her abducters (adopters) were oh so sweet until the revocation period passed then they slammed the door on our "open" adoption. Oh, but they are "Christian". They can f@ck themselves.
Sorry...rant.
Quoting MommieBre21:


And there isn't any thing I can do about it is there?


Quoting vampporcupine:

They got what they wanted, your baby, and now they have no use for you. Yes, this happens to many mothers with many different agencies.






Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MommieBre21
by Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:48 PM

I call and text asking for counseling like they are suppose to but they dont ever call or text back.


Quoting PortAngeles1969:

Very common! Their primary customer is the adoptive family - matching. Once this is accomplished the next "match" becomes the highest priority.

If they are supposed to offer you follow-up services and counseling they do need to follow through with that.

Is there something specific you are asking for and not getting an acceptable response to? We could offer better advice if you are willing to share.

I'm so sorry they do this - it's a loss upon a loss and at a time that you feel so weak. I remember it well and that was 22 years ago



MommieBre21
by Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:48 PM

exactly how I feel right now. I wish I could somehow get my twins back now.


Quoting vampporcupine:

Nope. I'm sorry but it is the reality of adoption. Your baby was the commodity that they wined and dined you for so they could turn a profit.

My daughters adoption apparently didn't have an agency (long story). Anyways, her abducters (adopters) were oh so sweet until the revocation period passed then they slammed the door on our "open" adoption. Oh, but they are "Christian". They can f@ck themselves.
Sorry...rant.
Quoting MommieBre21:


And there isn't any thing I can do about it is there?


Quoting vampporcupine:

They got what they wanted, your baby, and now they have no use for you. Yes, this happens to many mothers with many different agencies.








drfink
by Silver Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 11:23 PM

 I am sorry but that is what agencies do .I doubt they will return your call you have nothing more to provide them and they are busy in their efforts to get new babies.

I am BSE and my agency was "forward thinking" and said they would keep any info I gave so if he contacted them when he was 18 they would connect us uh NOPE.They lied to both for 35 years.He did contact when he was 18 but they told him I never looked as they told me every year.They lied to him the adoptee for 17 years.We think it is because they didn't care about him or even his A.P.s ...they weren't adopting again =no money.

This group will support you however they can.I am sorry you have needed to come to this group ...hugs.

 

ZakkarysMom
by Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 11:32 PM
Im so sorry hun. After my son was adopted the adoptive mother changed her phone number. I called the agency and they wouldnt give it to me.
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PortAngeles1969
by Group Admin on Jan. 20, 2013 at 12:39 AM
1 mom liked this
There is something we can do!!! Send me a message with the agency name and phone number. I will call them and not use your name - I don't even need it. I WILL get the head of that agency to talk to me and you WILL get a return phone call. Trust me - everyone they haven't been returning calls to will get returned calls an I'm sure there are more than just you. I do know how to deal with beuracratic agencies that are supposed to serve people and have to be reminded of that!
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PortAngeles1969
by Group Admin on Jan. 20, 2013 at 12:40 AM
Oh....and I will do it in love. There's a way to call people on their failings in love.
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