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4 Years of No Updates

Posted by on Aug. 30, 2017 at 7:01 PM
  • 8 Replies
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Its been 4 yrs since they last sent updates.

Thru my own detective skills (and an alt FB acct) I located pics and even some videos.

The email they set up for continued updates has never been used by them. I spotted her in person at the local pumpkin patch bit was never able to get close enough for a pic.

4 yrs of zero info from them. Its super shitty.
by on Aug. 30, 2017 at 7:01 PM
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Replies (1-8):
2jeffsmom
by Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2017 at 8:04 AM

I'm very sorry. Has there ever been contact? So sad that promises are made for the one goal, then broken.

onethentwins
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 6:23 PM

So sorry Randi. That's super shitty. How fucking hard is it to write an email and attach some pics. Do you still get to send stuff to her? How's Michelle dealing with it?

randi1978
by Bronze Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 7:28 PM
1 mom liked this

No face to face since she was born.  The sucky part is they were totally awesome about the pics and updates for so many years.  When things got stagnant, I just figured they were busy with their lives and kids (they adopted a little boy a few years after my daughter was born), but we're now on 4 yrs of no word at all.

Quoting 2jeffsmom:

I'm very sorry. Has there ever been contact? So sad that promises are made for the one goal, then broken.


randi1978
by Bronze Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 7:31 PM
1 mom liked this

That's what I keep thinking....how hard is it to shoot a quick email with some pics.  Hell, you don't even have to update anything, just a few pics would be nice.

We haven't been able to send anything since her first birthday.  Michelle now lurks on social media hoping to find her so she can tell her about us.  I did explain that it could backfire and to tread carefully, but she's almost 14 and we all know how well they listen at this age. 

Quoting onethentwins:

So sorry Randi. That's super shitty. How fucking hard is it to write an email and attach some pics. Do you still get to send stuff to her? How's Michelle dealing with it?


onethentwins
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 9:20 PM

As much as I hate agencies, can you at least send stuff for the agency to put in her file in case she goes looking?

Quoting randi1978:

That's what I keep thinking....how hard is it to shoot a quick email with some pics.  Hell, you don't even have to update anything, just a few pics would be nice.

We haven't been able to send anything since her first birthday.  Michelle now lurks on social media hoping to find her so she can tell her about us.  I did explain that it could backfire and to tread carefully, but she's almost 14 and we all know how well they listen at this age. 

Quoting onethentwins:

So sorry Randi. That's super shitty. How fucking hard is it to write an email and attach some pics. Do you still get to send stuff to her? How's Michelle dealing with it?


onethentwins
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 9:22 PM

Again, sorry I don't remember the details of your adoption, is there an agency you can complain to about them defaulting on their adoption agreement? Or was it private? Do you happen to know if their son's adoption was supposed to be open or closed?

Quoting randi1978:

No face to face since she was born.  The sucky part is they were totally awesome about the pics and updates for so many years.  When things got stagnant, I just figured they were busy with their lives and kids (they adopted a little boy a few years after my daughter was born), but we're now on 4 yrs of no word at all.

Quoting 2jeffsmom:

I'm very sorry. Has there ever been contact? So sad that promises are made for the one goal, then broken.


randi1978
by Bronze Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 10:47 PM

Private, through a lawyer.  And she has since retired.  Not sure if the son's adoption is open or closed. 

I know there's no way to enforce our agreement, just sucks that it appears to have finally happened.  About the only positive thing is that I'm a tenacious searcher and usually can find stuff if I know where to look.

Quoting onethentwins:

Again, sorry I don't remember the details of your adoption, is there an agency you can complain to about them defaulting on their adoption agreement? Or was it private? Do you happen to know if their son's adoption was supposed to be open or closed?

Quoting randi1978:

No face to face since she was born.  The sucky part is they were totally awesome about the pics and updates for so many years.  When things got stagnant, I just figured they were busy with their lives and kids (they adopted a little boy a few years after my daughter was born), but we're now on 4 yrs of no word at all.

Quoting 2jeffsmom:

I'm very sorry. Has there ever been contact? So sad that promises are made for the one goal, then broken.



onethentwins
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2017 at 11:55 PM

Yeah as much as I hate agencies, they seem to be better than private lawyers because even if the person who facilitated your adoption was evil, the next person may not be. And, the records don't die with the person. 

Quoting randi1978:

Private, through a lawyer.  And she has since retired.  Not sure if the son's adoption is open or closed. 

I know there's no way to enforce our agreement, just sucks that it appears to have finally happened.  About the only positive thing is that I'm a tenacious searcher and usually can find stuff if I know where to look.

Quoting onethentwins:

Again, sorry I don't remember the details of your adoption, is there an agency you can complain to about them defaulting on their adoption agreement? Or was it private? Do you happen to know if their son's adoption was supposed to be open or closed?

Quoting randi1978:

No face to face since she was born.  The sucky part is they were totally awesome about the pics and updates for so many years.  When things got stagnant, I just figured they were busy with their lives and kids (they adopted a little boy a few years after my daughter was born), but we're now on 4 yrs of no word at all.

Quoting 2jeffsmom:

I'm very sorry. Has there ever been contact? So sad that promises are made for the one goal, then broken.



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