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UPDATE: I am only human... Am I wrong for feeling this way.

Posted by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:50 PM
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Read my Journals on my home page for the entire story...


My husband had been in Ohio for over 6months. He left my 3 children and I when he lost his job, now he reside with his mother.

Our house went under and I had to think on my feet fast to support my children.

I filed for a divorce yet, he do not want to sign the papers.. Therefore, I am going to work around him.

My children and I are doing fine. We reside in an apartment and living average ( it's not what we are used too but we are blessed we have a roof over our heads).

I am still in Medical School, working part time and always tired as heck.. Yet, I make sure I make time my kids by taking them to the park or going out on an outing.

It's hard but I am doing what I have to do for my children...

Ladies, Would it be wrong or selfish of me if I made time for myself and maybe date every onces in awhile?

Again, if you want to read the whole story... Stop by my home page  and feel free to read my journals.



Ladies, I thank you all for taking the time out to read my post. I also thank you all for making suggestion. They helped out a lot!

Well Ladies, I took a break for "ME" time this weekend. I went to a festival at the park and listened to classical jazz live. It was awesome! I felt so relaxed listening to the smooth jazz.

In the mean time..I haven't spoke to my husband in a while. Because I needed a piece of mind. He call and text me all times of the night.  He had the nerve to ask me do I still want him to send me some money.. I didn't respond at all to either of his text messages nor calls. I felt like I didn't have to respond to his text messages. Reason for: He know I need help with our children.


I know we do not suppose to question God.. I did yesterday because my husband sent me a text saying " I took the job in New York.. They going to pay me a nice salary, also they are going to pay for my gas, food, and housing.. Not to mention they letting him stay in a house on the property which has 3 bedroom and 2 baths. He said he is not coming back to GA because he is not  strong enough.


Ladies, after I read the text messages I cried and cried. I asked God why are you blessing him and he left his family? Why is he getting everything his heart desire and I am struggle with 3 kids.. I am not angrywith God but I don't understand how he is getting blessed knowing I need those blessing.


It seems like when a person live for God.. Hell always come none stop.. But when a person does wrong it seems like blessings always come their way.

I am here struggle everyday! I do not have enough money for pampers, gas, or the utilities bills. I am flat out broke... He has gotten his check. Yet, he haven't sent us nothing.


Last week I put him on Child Supprt.. Because I cant go on thinking he will come around..

He feels like he is a single man.. He thinks he has no responsibilities..

Sometimes I feel like giving up because it is to much for me to bare.. I try to be strong for my children.. Everyday its something else, or more bad news..... Every day I think how am I going to get through the day.. How will I pay this or that..


Yet, my husband is living stress free..

I just don't understand ladies...

I am drain and tired...



by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:50 PM
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by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:07 PM

Hang in there!!!

riches dosen't give u happiness

u r blessed to have ur kids with u!

he isn't, he is over there by himself thinking of you and ur kids knowing he wont get u back and thats hell to him!

god is testing you to see how much faith you ahve in him!

we r in a similar situation me and my hubby lost our jobs havent worked for 6 months but we never gave up faith and neither should you!

we will pray for you and ur family!!praying

by on May. 24, 2009 at 7:16 PM

Big ***HUGS*** to you momma!  Hang in there, you'll get through this.

Know that your not alone in ?ing God.  We have a 4yr. dd w/ Autism, she's beautiful, but she is nonverbal and has many struggles.  I see so many other people that don't treat their kids well and make a lot of bad choices and their kids are jsut fine.  Here we are struggling w/ our dd, we do the right thing, we make good choices, we treat them all well, but this is what we get.  I know it's hard to hear and even harder to understand, but there is a reason for Gods plan.  Whether we like the reason or not.  I used to say if God were in front of me I'd smack him for what he's done to our dd, but w/ time I'm changing.

So hang in there, do you have any close family or friends who can help you out?

by on May. 24, 2009 at 7:25 PM

Yeah right!  You have horrid grammar and you're trying to tell us you're in medical school?!  I spell bull shit.


by on May. 24, 2009 at 10:27 PM

No your not wrong for feeling angry about your husband leaving.  I've had some bad things happen in my life too.  I've been through a lot and at the time I couldn't see my way through.  I didn't know how I was going to make it.  Now that I've come through those things I realize that God carried me through.  I don't know why some people have it easier than others, but you need to trust God and rely on him.  I'm telling you, have I not been through those things, I never would have learned to trust God.  Now I know that God will always be there.  The Bible Said's that God sits down in the middle of praise.  So when your feeling down.  Tell him thank you any how and that you're still going to put your trust in him, and watch the way that he blesses you.  I promise he will.  As for your husband, he did you wrong and you can't make somebody want to be with you.  So at least he has a good job so that he can pay good child support.  That might be the reason that God allowed him to have it.  Go to  this will prepare you for the future, it did me. GOD BLESS You from the soles of your feet to the top of your head.  The Bible said that when any two persons touch and agree on anything it will be done.  I want you to agree with me that you will get through this,and that you will be blessed until the bless call you blessed.

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