Explaining to a 4 year old the feeling to pee. Also dealing with extra ureter issue. Help!

[Wendsdy]

I have a very bright and extremely dramatic 4 1/2 year old. She poops in the toilet every time...luckily!  She rarely pees in the toilet.  She seems to do it when her pull up is at the limit. Its like she knows it won't stand another drop. Today I asked her why she didn't use the toilet, she said she didn't know the feeling when she is about to pee. Is that even possible? She is very dramatic and I wouldn't doubt she is just making that up.  I don't even know the words to use to describe the feeling. Any suggestions?  

FYI: My daughter has a possible medical condition. She has a duplicated collecting system (extra ureter) in one of her kidneys. They don't know where this extra ureter is connected. Meaning she could have a constent leak. That just confuses things. Because of that, I really can't take away the pull ups. We see the Dr. this summer where they will do further tests. A little leaking I have no problem with, its full blown peeing in the pull up. Some is just laziness...I think. Is it possible she doesn't know the feeling? Any suggestions on wording to explain it to her?

Any advice would really be appreciated. Also, if anyone else has dealt with this extra ureter thing, I would appreciate any info you have.  

Thanks so much!

[JanieJo]

I am dealing with the same kind of thing with my 5 year old son, he doesnt feel it when he needs to go and we have been working on this for a year.

[jenniferlee_12]

That is tough and I think that you might have to wait to see what the dr says. You could set a timer and make her try to go every so often and maybe that will trigger something to make her feel that she needs to go.