Simply stumped with this one. Let me start by saying I have b/g twins. My son has been fully potty trained (but not night time yet) for about 6 months. He's a people pleaser, so PT him was a piece of cake. My daughter is bright, intelligent, beautiful, talented, funny -- all wonderful things. She's also strong willed! Poor little thing gets that from both mommy & daddy. Issue is this. I did as the books instruct, and let her decide when it was time (Stress Free Potty Training). We are 1/2 a week in now and she has fabulous days with maybe 1-2 accidents, and then other days where it's 6-7 accidents. I simply don't know what to do. Is she doing this on purpose??? I thought that by waiting until she was this age and letting it be her decision that it might go a little easier than this. The truly baffling thing is that she had an accident (while we were at the gym) -- I took her to the RR, changed her, did my best to not show any signs of frustration, washed hands, headed out to the car -- maybe 8 minutes total time from change of clothes (again!) to arrival to car. As we are entering car I notice her dress is a little wet. I ask, she denies. I ask if she has to go, she says no. I get her into her car seat, lift up her dress, panties are wet. No UTI's, no illness. This was her 4th accident of the day, and it was only 12:30p. It can't be that she doesn't feel the sensation because other days she does great, and tells me when she has to go, holds it long enough to get there, etc... Defiance? I don't know. We've been doing a sticker chart/reward system. I decided today to take it down, and no longer reward. She seemed fine with the idea, took the chart down herself and tossed it into the trash. Maybe it's time for negative consequences??? I don't know. Any similar experiences out there???? Any help you may have is so very appreciated. I'm ready to pull my hair out!
She's plenty old enough to be fully trained like her brother. Seems to me she's just doing it on purpose.
If she can go days without messes (not accidents because she knows how to use the toilet and CAN do it without problems some days) so expecting her to go every day without messes is appropriate.
She's old enough to start understanding that her CHOICES have consequences. I'd recommend putting her into a cool/lukewarm shower every time she messes on herself. Sell it as a consequence, not as a punishment. Let her know that if she makes the CHOICE not to use the toilet, then she's making a CHOICE to have a cool/lukewarm shower to get cleaned up. The shower is a consequence to her choice. If you go that route, make the shower very business-like. Get her in, get her clean and get her out- no toys, no playtime, just business.
Potty training gone wrong!
- DeeAnna1971
on May. 24, 2011 at 3:48 PM