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Need to vent - what's your take on this?!?!

Posted by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 9:59 PM
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This is my 11 year old son's last year in his wrestling club before moving up to junior high next year. He started out in a different club and wrestled there for 3 years but we left because the coach was an idiot! He had been thrown out of other youth sports and then he was offered the opportunity of a lifetime as head wrestling coach of a very large local college and he blew that as well!!!  Needless to say, we joined the club he is currently in and this is his 4th season there. Year by year, I am disliking this coach just as much as the last.  This past Sunday my son wrestled in a dual team meet. My husband has been assisting as a coach when he can, as he works out of town and can't make every practice. He tells our son if he knows that he is able to pin his opponent that he should work some moves first to gain some experience from those moves that he doesn't get to use that often and then he can pin later in the match. (Which he did twice on Sunday.)  Well, the coach gave my son an attitude and told him when he tells him to go out there and pin somebody that he should just go out there and pin somebody and it isn't all about him but about the team and when my son told him what my husband said about working moves first, he went on to tell my son "well your dad isn't the coach of this team"!!!  My son just said "well, my dad is MY coach" and he walked away. He was in tears telling his friends mom "he's dissing my dad"!   My opinion is, a pin is a pin is a pin, regardless if it comes in the first second or the last!!!  I did not see or hear any of this because I take all of the team photographs. My husband did not see or hear any of this because he was keeping score at the table. Anyhow, the coach comes over shortly after to tell my husband his version of the story first (typical 5 year old!) but that was exactly it........HIS version.........he fails to tell him what he first said to my son! My son went 12-1 in the regular league season last year with 11 of those wins by pin. It was the best record on the team,  but what did he get for it??? Was it the outstanding wrestler of the year? NO! Was it the coaches award? NO! He got the Iron Man trophy for showing up to practice every night! Those other awards were given to the coaches "favorites"! My son is a 2X league champion and came in 2nd place last year to a boy he wrestled about 6 times but has never been able to beat. (Oh, and he was also a 2X 2nd place finisher in his previous league with the other team as well.) I don't think anyone on our team has ever held that record! Then last night at practice, this joker goes on to tell the whole team that when he says to pin someboy now he means now, saying this as he's staring my son down the whole time!!!  I usually stay at practice with a couple of other parents but I had to walk away!!! My husband then tells me tonight that this moron actually asked the kids at practice to raise their hands if they cried in their matches on Sunday and then went on to say that he doesn't want any cryer's!!! OMG!!!!!!! They are 5-12 year olds........they're gonna cry now and again!!!!  UGH!!!!!!!! My husband and I just keep telling ourselves and our son that this is his last year!!!!!! What's your take on all of this???

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 9:59 PM
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pamela93
by Member on Dec. 18, 2008 at 9:31 AM

Ok you may not like what I have to say but this is my take.

I have seen were the kid could have pinned his guy but he messed around trying to do other moves to "practice" well the kid got pinned himself. He got caught in the wrong move and couldn't get out. So I do see were the coach is coming from and your son should listen to the coach. My oldest, his father and the coach have gotten into it. Mine you my son is in highschool, about who he needs to listen too. The coach said that he gets paid to be the coach not the dad and if his father wanted to coach him instead then he needs to be there everyday and the coach would step back but not do anything with our son. My ex has since learned to let the coach "coach".

Now how he singled him out at practice like that, that was not right. To me that is being alittle childish. I can see were you are mad.

The crying part, well in a few states that we wrestle at they have a no crying rule. Its were if you are crying on the mat the other guy gets a point. Its because some kids will cry to get the ref to stop the match so they don't get pinned. Now if they are really hurt then there is a reason and the match needs to be stopped and then who cares if there is a point given you are hurt. This is for the youth programs. I have always thought my boys that if they want to go wrestle they need to be tuff and crying is not being tuff. I do tell them that crying is ok off the mat just not on it.

Ok thats my take sorry if it's not what you wanted but you wanted your takes!

mjandaj
by Member on Dec. 18, 2008 at 6:54 PM

OK about the crying first, the coach should have said, turn them tears in to anger.  That helps, not there is going to be no crying.  It is sometimes hard for kids to adjust.  Not ever kids first year is easy, well heck I don't know one kid yet that has a awesome year, that has never wrestled.

 

About the pin thing,  so where you just at a normal tournament or duels?

If it was a regular tournament, I don't see what the coaches problem was,  my husband has done that many times, it isn't about getting stuck, it is about practice.  Sometimes kids don't have good competetion in there own league, so when they do go to tournaments that is were they practice there moves.  So I do understand.   I don't know if that helps you at all.

One other thing, look for another league or club don't take your son out of the sport because of a coach.

 

June

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