Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

New to ADHD

Posted by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 2:18 PM
  • 9 Replies
  • 195 Total Views
I am not the parent of an ADHD child. But I am now a child care provider to an ADHD child. This is all brand-new to me. His mom says things have just recently gotten worse and she doesn't know why. I believe part of the problem is just too many changes at once. His previous child care provider quit, it was the end of the school year, he started going to summer camp and then coming to my house afterwards. That's a lot of changes for anybody.

I want to help this child--for his sake, his mom's sake, and my own! He was recently kicked out of his summer camp program, so I will have him full-time until school starts.

A few moms already gave me some basics in response to a post in another group. But since it looks like I'm going to be involved on a more full-time basis, I thought I'd join the group and see what I can learn!

I will start digging through posts to see what I can find, but if anyone has a moment to give me some basic thoughts on the following, I would appreciate it!

Diet: I know it's probably a good idea to avoid a lot of sugar. But are there any specific foods that HELP at all? I've heard that omega-3s are important for ADHD kids (the rest of us too). But is there anything else? He's a picky eater, as many kids his age are.

Activities: This child's mom said that it helps if he has things he can do with his hands--like Legos and Lincoln Logs. Are there any other specific activities you can recommend?

Other: Like I said, I am BRAND NEW to this. So feel free to load me up with your best advice! Right now I only have a few kids, but when my license is approved I will have more. I'm concerned about how to give this child the attention he requires without neglecting the emotional needs of the other children. I don't want anyone to feel that I'm 'playing favorites.'

Thanks in advance!
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 2:18 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
jinxmom
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 2:39 PM
How old is the child?  Is this child on meds or not?

I will tell you that structure is very important to an adhd child also keeping them busy.  The mom should be helpful in letting you know what works or doesn't work as far as how she disciplines, likes and dislikes in foods, sugar intake, when and if the child will have a meltdown etc.  Most adhd kids are loveable, creative and intelligent.  Their energy level is very high but much more (if on meds) when the meds start wearing off and they need to release that energy.  Make sure the rules and the consequences for breaking them are posted and/or told to the child and mom and be consistent.  Mom may have helpful info as far as how she handles the breaking of the rules. 

What activities do you have planned?  Is the child old enough and responsible enough to help?  Can the child help?  Mom has said hands on activities are good for the child so it sounds like puzzles, legos, building materials will keep him/her busy.  Hope this has helped.
RobynS
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 2:55 PM
Thank you so much. He is 7 years old and on meds. His doctor recently said that he also has OCD. I don't know if that's common in ADHD or not, but he is on meds for both.

I just started doing day care and haven't really worked out the specifics of a schedule yet. I know that's important, so I'm working on it! I'm having a hard time getting him to follow the rules--I have to tell him over and over and over and over again. Each time he acts as those he's hearing it for the first time.

I keep telling his mom to pass along as much information as possible that would be helpful to me. The thing is, she is doing this alone and she is really struggling right now. His behavior has gotten worse and she can't figure out why. I asked about a reward system for good behavior. She said things like that only work for a short time and then he loses interest.

She threatens him with belt spankings. I, of course, will not be spanking any child in my home! He has gotten physical with me once already, and I'm not really sure how to handle that.

I can see that he desperately wants attention. I know that all kids do--and it doesn't really matter if it's positive attention or negative attention. If they're not getting enough positive attention, they will act out to GET YOUR ATTENTION.

Any kids in my care will have to understand that this isn't Disneyland. I'm not here to amuse them for 9 hours a day. I will try to make it fun and provide interesting activities, but I also have to cook, clean, etc.

Thanks again for hearing me out. I have a lot to learn!
jinxmom
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:09 PM
Is there a possibility that his meds aren't working or working against each other.  The mom might need to let the doctor know he is getting worse and adjust his meds or change them.  I know its stressful and frustrating I have a 13 yr old dd w/adhd.  I have heard that boys have worse symptoms than the girls.  Not sure how true that is but regardless adhders have so much to offer and they need so much love and understanding along with consistent discipline.  The mom is right with saying rewards etc. works for awhile then they lose interest so you have to try other things, then  they lose interest in other things then you have to go back  and start all over again.   Yikes I know its a viscous circle.  Hope this has helped.
4greatkids
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:20 PM

I am fairly new to this to, howevre with regard to food, I have found that my child does better if I cut out:

Caffeine - often found in unexpected places
Red Dye
Yellow Dye
Blue Dye

tlgmcg
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 5:06 PM

Quoting 4greatkids:

I am fairly new to this to, howevre with regard to food, I have found that my child does better if I cut out:

Caffeine - often found in unexpected places
Red Dye
Yellow Dye
Blue Dye

My son actually does better on caffeine.  It's a stimulant and often has the oppisite effect on ADHD (but not always).

My son is 7 and we use a reward chart with him.  I do think it is getting old for him.  I recently started a sticker bag so that I can "catch him being good" and instantly reward him.  I know this age tends to like the instant reward thing.

Also, you could try rewarding him with the things he likes to do, like the legos or stuff.  Just try to keep things positive (which can be near impossible sometimes). 
RobynS
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 5:12 PM
This is all great!! Keep it coming! Regarding the dyes... I JUST finished giving him rainbow goldfish crackers for snack. D'oh!

We are actually having our best day so far. He desperately wants me to give him a 'good report' when his mom comes. He's trying so hard!
pjjordan
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 10:11 PM
I have a 6 year old w/ ADHD so I can recommend what works for me when he is out of control, when I see him way too anxious I practice breathing exercises w/ him I also tell him to take a bah, not a shower a bath and I put some chamomille and lavender soothing bath from jhonson's I know is for babies but it helps him a lot, make him color books, cut papers, do puzzles, anything that requires concentration, as a reward when he behaves I let him play 30 minutes with his video games, he loves that, but only 30 minutes, I noticed that he burns a lot of energy when i take him to the beach or the pool, and when he doesn't behave I hold his hands, look at him directly and the eyes and talk slowly to him and after I give him directions or orders of what I want him to do or not to do, I ask him if he understood me , and when he says yes , I tell him"of course you understand, because you are such a good and smart boy and thats why I love you, after I do that he feels so happy that he behaves so he can hear it again, this usually works, but when it doesn't work I talk to him and tell him he has to sit  quietly and think of what he is done, after 5 minutes he comes to me to apologize and to tell me that he loves me, I try to avoid sugars and too many carbs, I also make him read a lot, he is also in a baseball team, and every other weekend i take him to the park so he can run freely and burn energy .I hope this helps you.
RobynS
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 10:54 PM

Quoting pjjordan:

...when he doesn't behave I hold his hands, look at him directly and the eyes and talk slowly to him...
Thank you. I just have one question. What if they won't look you in the eye? I tried putting my hands on this child's shoulders when I had him in time-out the other day, so I could gently talk to him about what had happened. He REFUSED to look me in the eye. He turned his head and when I tried to 'follow,' he quickly turned back the other way. He squeals and/or growls at me. That's usually my first sign that he's about to have a meltdown.

Today was the BEST day we've had so far. He was trying really hard and I made sure to praise him for that--though, if I don't praise him often enough, he will ask for it! "Am I doing good today?"

I'm so glad you all are willing to take the time to share your wisdom with me.


pjjordan
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 11:05 PM

well my son used to turn his head too, but I kept on doing it until he looked me in the eye It took me a lot of talking and encouraging phrases until he didn't feel embarrased around me,

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)