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Posted by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 10:07 AM
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Hi, I am wondering how many of you out there may be experiencing the same thing I am with my kids. My son has ADHD and takes meds for it. When he is on his meds and is faced with a problem, his decision making skills are very good, and he makes better choices. However, when he is not on his meds, as was the case yesterday, and he is faced with a problem he resorts to hitting or kicking or yelling to resolve his problem. So, what I noticed was this:

My 8 year old daughter will antagonize my son by doing various things throughout the day...sticking a tape measure in his face, walking past him and touching him, saying something mean, etc. Then when he has had enough he will finally hit her, which was what I saw last night. All day I kept telling her to leave her brother alone, and not once did he bother her, but finally at the end of the day he had enough so he hit her in the arm really hard and she cried. This happened right in front of me, so she looked at me, as if I was going to punish him, and I simply said to her, "I have been telling you all day to leave your brother alone, and you keep starting fights. So, I would have hit you too if you had kept doing that to me all day." What she didn't know is that I had watched her all day as she would passively say or do things to him (things that may look innocent or accidental). I think he handled himself very well all day puting up with his sister, especially not being medicated.

So, I am just wondering if any of you go through any of this, and how you handle the other sibling who is antagonizing the ADHD child.

By the way, when I tucked my son inthat night I told him he did a very good job all day handling his sister, but he really shouldn't have hit her. Although I can't really blame him...a person can only be pushed so far.

Any advice on how I can stop the antagonistic sister?

by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 10:07 AM
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by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 10:30 AM
I wish I could give you advice for this but we are going through the same thing! lol. My 5 yr. old son has autism & bi-polar 2, and his older sister who is 12 going on 2, antagonizes him DAILY. It drives me nuts.


 Mommy to Mackenzie, Colin, and Grace.

by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 10:38 AM
I am starting to think that she loves to see her brother get into trouble. My brother has a lot wrong with him...not sure of his diagnosis...and when we were kids he used to antagonize us all the time, but he was the one with the disorders. He never got into trouble...and we always did (me and my sister).
by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 2:07 PM
Wow, this sounds like my two. My yongest is 8 is on meds, my older son is 14 (going on 3) and will say things to the youngest just to get him going.  It's so aggravating when you tell the older one to QUIT and they keep going, yeah he deserves what he gets from the younger one, BUT, in turn I am trying to TEACH this child to handle is anger in a different way.  I wish I had better advice.
by on Jul. 26, 2007 at 12:38 AM
I know where you are coming from I have four 12,14,16,17 and my youngest is BP and adhd, and some time the rest of him just gang up on him, they think it is funny when he has an outburst. I have even caught my hubby joining in on it, We went trounds about that.
by on Jul. 26, 2007 at 9:55 AM

I have a 2.5 and an almost 5 year old we go through it everyday,  Its my oldest does it to my youngest, and I can understand why you did not punishing him.  Its hard all she does is push him around.  Nothing has worked for us.  But I do make them both go to time out and apologize, also ask if the other needs a hug.  I know some of that wouldnt work for you b/c of your kids ages.  Maybe you can have them write an apology to the other one, or do something nice for them like one of their chores.  Just a few thoughts.

(Mommy to Corrin and Max)

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