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Does anyone have multiple children and only HS 1 of them?

Posted by on Feb. 25, 2011 at 11:33 PM
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I know I wouldn't be able to teach all of them and its not what they would want anyway, but one of my fears is that homeschooling one child is going to create a cycle of the other 2 saying, "I can't go to school - I'm sick.  I'm nervous.  Why does she get to stay here and I don't?"  My daughter has anxiety and I think she could benefit from teaching in the home but I have some reservations.  Advice?

by on Feb. 25, 2011 at 11:33 PM
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Replies (1-10):
timon95
by Welcome Squad on Feb. 26, 2011 at 12:57 AM

how old are your kids and what grades are they in?

Erin814
by Guidance on Feb. 26, 2011 at 1:56 AM
Personally, I couldn't see myself homeschooling one and not the other(s). I guess it depends on your specific situation though. I would feel like I'm giving one child a better education and more support and opportunity than the other(s).
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mommyofthree73
by Testing the waters on Feb. 26, 2011 at 2:53 AM
I only homeschooling my youngest who is on the autism spectrum. His brother is only a year older and I worried the same way, but he loves public school and doesn't want to stay home. The only thing I wish is that i could include him on our field trips, but I don't want to pull him out for just any and take away his learning. I think though I'm going to take him kayaking with us in June, it's the next to last week of school, so he shouldn't miss anything. Oh, I guess maybe I should have said my homeschooler is doing first grade curriculum and my older son is in 4th grade :). And my daughter is graduating this year :).
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BusCaptainMama
by Helping Hands on Feb. 26, 2011 at 3:09 AM
When I began HSing I was planning on only doing my 2nd child. She has epilepsy, so it was a safety decision. My 1st dd asked why I didn't want her home with us, why I didn't want to teach her. I didn't have an answer ~ we've been HSing ever since & have since added my ds when he got older & will also be adding my youngest ds 'officially' next year :)
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buzymamaof3
by Hall Monitor on Feb. 26, 2011 at 7:58 AM

Agreed.

Quoting Erin814:

Personally, I couldn't see myself homeschooling one and not the other(s). I guess it depends on your specific situation though. I would feel like I'm giving one child a better education and more support and opportunity than the other(s).


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momnotmaid
by Welcome Squad on Feb. 26, 2011 at 10:29 AM

For a little back ground, I have 3 girls, twins who are 10 and in 5th grade and my baby (haha) who is 6 and in 1st grade.  Our school system is amazing and each of my children has an issue; the youngest ADD, the middle twin is lazy and the oldest of the 3 has debilitating anxiety.  She's had a bad year as it is and next year they are entering middle school.  Its new teachers, new big school, new kids who will make fun of her (we haven't made it a full year on the bus yet in their education because my anxiety girl ends up coming home crying from someone doing something and her life is at an end.  Shes dramatic and outgoing and I don't see her having any social issues if she's out of school, she just can't get to school and its getting to the point where I am looking at getting in trouble for her missing too much time (or her getting held back which wont help her situation either) or I have thought of pulling her out on my terms to be taught by me until we see its time for her to go back.

In all honesty, she's missed this entire week of school (we have to have her do an intreatment facility for her anxiety - an even longer story) and I've come to the conclusion that if we had just pulled her and homeschooled her about  2 months ago we wouldn't be looking at hospitalization now.  Its like we're fighting with everyone to keep her in - I have a masters degree in middle school education so its not like I don't know my stuff I just feel like SOCIAL PRESSURE to keep her in.  This kid thing isn't easy.

I know the other 2 are where they need to be, I know that!  They will whine about going but they enjoy being there.  Somedays they're bored but what kid isn't.  With this child I just feel like I'm fighting her hard to keep her in school and pushing her away (which she's stated) and its causing more harm than good.

I'm looking for advice so don't feel like you have to be gentle!

lucsch
by on Feb. 27, 2011 at 2:36 PM

I homeschool 1 of 4. The eldest went all the way through in a private school, while I homeschooled the next two for one year, after they left that school (for financial reasons primarily). The next year they went to public school and are still there. I homeschool my daughter now, who was just a baby when all this school switching happened.

It works for us. I think everyone was/is happy with the arrangement, though my dd has this idea that homeschooling isn't "real" school because her brothers go to public school. No one has complained about the arrangement or said it was unfair. We are doing what we feel is best for each individual child. I actually offered to continue to homeschool the two boys, but they like public school.

maggiemom2000
by Helping Hands on Feb. 27, 2011 at 7:16 PM
I think it really depends on your situation. Clearly you have one child who is going to benefit greatly by being home schooled. I think part of the question is would the other kids benefit as well. If you are anticipating them wanting to stay home as well, then I'd be inclined to just homeschool all of them.

I think it will only work to homeschool one if you are really doing more of a "school at home" method.

Let me explain. I too came onto hooking as an experienced credentialed teacher. My boys has just completed grades 1& 3 in PS when we started homeschooling. What I have learned in my almost 2 yrs of homeschooling that there is a big difference between doing "school at home" and "homeschooling". I have found my approach and educational philosophy change a lot since I've started homeschooling.

When I say school at home I picture similar structured, teacher directed lessons as you'd see in a traditional school setting. There is usually a set time when lessons are completed. When I picture "homeschooling" it is almost more of a lifestyle. Most of the teacher directed lessons and assignments are out. There is no set time for learning, you start to see everything as "school". Homeschool happens 24/7 so it is hard to do it with only one child.

When I first started I was doing more of a school at home approach. Even with more of a traditional approach I quickly realized how little time it took to complete the full day's school lessons. I realized how much of my kids' day was "wasted" with classroom management, and doing worksheets of things they already had masterd and didn't need practice on, but they had to complete the assignment like everybody else. With that in mind I would feel pretty bad having some kids still in school!

You may just have to give it a try for a few months and see how it goes.

Good luck!
Brice75
by Testing the waters on Feb. 28, 2011 at 7:20 AM

I'm having the same problem =(    I JUST pulled my older 2 out of middle school for safety issues and my 4th and 2nd grader are very upset.  My 2nd grader was crying this morning when I dropped her off and my heart just sank!  I see other kids happy at school and that is just not my kids....I am doing an online school...not k12 because they stopped enrollment here, but it seems very well organized and I think I may be able to handle my other 2 as well.

PBBJ
by Welcome Squad on Mar. 1, 2011 at 10:17 AM

I have 3 children, 8,10, and 15. We HS the oldest but since the 2 younger ones have a different dad that doesn't agree with HS we don't them. They whine about it sometimes but they really like PS and are doing great there.

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