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Need to have the "talk" with my daughter.

Posted by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:21 PM
  • 6 Replies

What is the best appropriate age to have the "talk" with your daughters? How far should the details go? Are there any really good and appropriate books anyone would recommend? My daughter is almost 13. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:21 PM
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mummie2b2010
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 3:34 AM

American girl has a nice book called all about you. And if she asks always anwser so she doesnt go asking others. And With our society today I think NOW is the perfect time to talk about it ALL where I live girls are getting pregnant at her age-hurts me to see it! Make her feel comfortable so she always comes to you no matter what it is

mummie2b2010
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 3:37 AM

and sneak things in you know ask questions while you guys are watching tv or pay attention to her interests lately-things she watches on tv,reads conversations she has with friends like i said before MAKE HER FEEL COMFORTABLE! If she comes to you with a crush dont make her feel bad about it but do explain everything

LizKyleighsMom
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 3:50 AM

I was just about to recommend that American Girl book!  It is absolutely wonderful and covers everything you can think of from head to toe...basic hygiene, to the different types of bras and why girls sometimes need different ones, to acne, pre-period, menstruation, sex, you name it.  I got mine from Barnes and Noble online used for like $4. 

My oldest daughter is almost 10 but I've always tried to nonchalantly include sex education in our everyday lives.  Things like when I go get my birth control pills from the pharmacy, I tell her what they are for; or (we are a very open household) when I'm using the bathroom and need a tampon from the other bathroom I'll ask her to get it...even my 2 yo knows what they are for.  I would get something that tells her exactly what is going on with her body and let her know what her choices are...some might disagree and preech abstinance only but that rarely works...my best piece of advice is just be honest.  At 13, she probably already knows more than you think she does...I actually lost my viginity at 13 because no one had ever talked to me about sex...I mean really, really talked WITH me.  Let her know that no matter what happens, she can always come to you with no fear of punishment.  That's not to say she won't hear something she doesn't want to, but reward her for her honesty by not punishing further.  If you haven't already, I would also talk with her about her body being "her body" and what to do in a situation where someone makes her uncomfortable or makes advances she isn't comfortable with.  Give her the words to use in that situation and make her aware.  Don't mean to write a book here but as a 31 year old mom of 2 girls who lost her own virginity at 13, this is a serious thing.  I don't want your daughter or mine to make the same decision I did;o)  Just be honest momma, she might roll her eyes but hey...better she roll her eyes and pretend not to care than the alternative!  Good luck!

me4stepmom
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 10:41 AM

I think everyone so far has said a lot of good things.  Does the American Girl book cover STD's and how condoms won't protect you from quite a  number of STD's including Chlamydia or HPV--which causes cervical cancer?   

mummie2b2010
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 4:38 PM


Quoting me4stepmom:

I think everyone so far has said a lot of good things.  Does the American Girl book cover STD's and how condoms won't protect you from quite a  number of STD's including Chlamydia or HPV--which causes cervical cancer?   


no but theres a number of books for that and many other resources and of course "word of Mouth" a book cant do everything you do have to use your words.

momto3infl
by on Dec. 16, 2009 at 6:05 AM

Well I have always talked and really went into to detail with sex and body at age 9yrs old and she is now 11yrs.  My 8 and 5yr I answer questions so far and soon will be having the talk with my 8yr son. 

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