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How to help my daughter with her anxiety?

Posted by on Jan. 26, 2011 at 8:23 PM
  • 7 Replies

Hi everyone I am new to this group and I am trying to help my 10 year old daughter with her anxiety and panic attacks.My daughter is a sweet shy and caring child but she gets overwhelmed  when she does not understand her assignments or when her friends do not include her in things.I have a open door conversation relationship with her so she comes to me for everything she was bullied from 2nd grade to 4th grade and i know that effected her she speaking to the school social worker and taking yoga to relax but at times I feel overwhelmed and I feel like I failed as a mom.I  appreciate everyones advice .

by on Jan. 26, 2011 at 8:23 PM
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Replies (1-7):
SuperLooneyMom
by on Jan. 26, 2011 at 10:57 PM

I think you are doing a great job as a mom. It is so nice to hear that your daughter is open to you. As I guess is what she needs. And I think your doig everything it takes to help her. I am not sure I would do anything different. As for the bullying, has it stopped? if not, has there been something in the works to try and corral this. Bullying has become a major issue among students as I am sure you are aware. back in the day we could call the kids parents and speak to them. Now it seems as if your talk to parents the worse it is for the victim. I think bulling should be treated like harrassment.

I might recommend, tho during school hours that if your dd feels a anxiety attack coming on perhaps the facility can allow her  private room to calm in. without a students presence and maybe the school social worker nearby. My son has a mood disorder and with the schools help we are able to improv on his school and homework. My son needs a lot of encouragement and positive in his life. We are using a reward system and my ds only has to do what he an on homework. And what he cant do and needs help I initial and he can go the the Learning Center at school and get the extra help he needs. All apart of the 504 program . Maybe check into that too..

standstill
by Member on Jan. 27, 2011 at 8:52 AM
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement as for the bullying it has stopped due to my daughter stood her ground and stood up for herself. I will talk to her teacher about letting her have a private room when she feels a panic attack or anxiety coming on as you suggested.
onlyiknew
by on Jan. 27, 2011 at 9:05 AM

Just continuing what you are doing the being there and trying is more than most of the parents I know unfortunately. I wish you all the luck my daughter is high strung but no where near as bad as yours it is not always easy but being there number one. good luck

Zamaria
by Silver Member on Jan. 27, 2011 at 9:35 AM
I don't have any experience with anxiety attacks in kids. My husband panics over things like tests though. It helps him to sit and think of the worst possible outcome then he realizes that it really isn't that bad. Hope she gets better soon!
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wolfgirlbec
by on Jan. 27, 2011 at 4:48 PM

Hi and welcome! I,too,have a 10 year old daughter that has anxiety/panic issues,though hers,we are told,stems from her recent dx of clinical depression(DH has it as well),as well as being dx'd as gifted 3 years ago.In our situation, think it's a combo of the pressures and expectations a gifted child has foisted on them,as well as a factor of her depression,though the meds she is on now and the regular therapy sessions are helping her too...also,my daughter,like yours,has often been made fun of and yes,bullied by some of her fellow peers.I immediately reported what was going on to the school prinicipal and she also sees her guidance counselor fairly frequently as well.Have you informed the school as to what's been happening btw? I ask because most every school now has and is supposed to enforce a ZERO TOLERANCE for bullying in or on school grounds. Another thing,and I hope you don't think me too nosy for asking but,has your daughter started going thru puberty yet? I ask because Sally has and I think the hormonal changes,too,could be another factor as to why our girls tend to be so anxious.I hope that helps you a little. Last but certainly not least,have you ever considered taking her to see a therapist outside of the school environment? Perhaps,being away from the school altogether might make her feel more comfortable and therefore more apt to "open up" and talk about what is bothering her. Becuase my daughter,too,comes to me for pretty much anything and everything but regular therapy could really benefit her as well as teach her strategies on how to cope when she starts to feel anxious.I hope this helps and I hope you know that you are not alone here! light and lovingkindness always!:-)

SuperLooneyMom
by on Jan. 27, 2011 at 7:26 PM
I too want to add my son is dx'd ADHD and anxiety w depression. It he was 7 1/2 when we had him seen by a md. He is currently on meds that we are changing so often just to balance the 2 diagnoses. He is finally on one med that allows him to focus and keep him emotions in check. My first post I didn't want to push meds as they are not always the answer. But should this continue it may be a option in the future. I just chose meds because my oldest is ADHD and I am ADHD with depression .anxiety and my tolerance is very low.
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jlynnet73
by on Jan. 28, 2011 at 11:18 AM

I understand this completely! My daughter is not shy, but at times she exhibits such low self-esteem. When she starts to feel anxious she will say, "mom my chest hurts and I cannot take a deep breath." So normally we do easy things. I hold her and have her take deep relaxing breaths. Sometimes this works better than others. Mostly, distractions help and sometimes even talking about what is bothering her, if there is something. I know this is basic, but know you are no the only one struggling with this.

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