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Tween Titans Tween Titans

When is it the right time?

Posted by on May. 14, 2012 at 10:28 AM
  • 14 Replies

My oldest son is about to turn 11.  I know he's going to start hitting puberty soon. ( I am so dreading it.  Why do they have to grow up so fast?)  My question is, when is the right time to start talking to him about the changes he is about to go through?  How do I even begin to have "The Talk" with him?  I know it's probably my husband's job but he procrastinates on everything and I dont want my son to start junior high in the fall without at least some knowledge of what he will be facing soon.  He's a nervous kid and doesn't deal well with change.  Help me out Moms.  What should I do?

by on May. 14, 2012 at 10:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
momofthree929
by on May. 14, 2012 at 10:48 AM
1 mom liked this

Every child is different. We started talking with our boys I guess last year. They will be 12 in a week. My hubby does most of the talking since they are uncomfortable talking to me about some of it. I would tell him as soon as you think he is ready to know. When you think he will understand. I would rather my boys learn from us than to learn false stuff from their peers. I also told them to please ask questions if they hear anything at school.   GOOD LUCK!

momto3infl
by Bronze Member on May. 14, 2012 at 11:04 AM
I started with answering any questions as they have grown up. Then start main talks between 8-9 yrs old.
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psych_mom
by on May. 14, 2012 at 11:35 AM
1 mom liked this

We started talking to our oldest when he was about 9 or 10. He is now 11 and has started puberty. You really should talk to him soon since it can happen at any time.

TGOLD1
by Member on May. 14, 2012 at 1:41 PM

Have you already discussed this w/ your husband at least? I would let him know taht this can't wait & he needs to step up & do it. Then if that falls through, go ahead & talk to him yourself.

steelcrazy
by Silver Member on May. 14, 2012 at 2:36 PM
1 mom liked this

My 11 year old has body hair already and is well into puberity.  I would let your husband know that he needs to start talking to your son about puberity now, before it is too late.

styler7
by on May. 14, 2012 at 4:45 PM
Around 8-9 years old. Puberty can hit at anytime. I'd talk to him now ;)
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Wyldbutterfly
by on May. 14, 2012 at 4:54 PM
1 mom liked this

Start talking to him now and keep on talking Momma. Let him know that it's okay to come to you with any question(s) he may have and that none are stupid or silly.

sbp8276
by on May. 14, 2012 at 6:06 PM

I have talked to my husband about it for probably the last year and a half.  Every time I bring it up, he says he'll do it but he never does. He says the same thing anytime I ask him to do something.  I can't just keep waiting for him to do it.  I dont want my son to learn the wrong things from other kids. My parents never had "the talk" with me and I learned everything from my friends or sex ed at school.   I want my son to know the facts and know that it's ok to ask any questions he may have. 

Quoting TGOLD1:

Have you already discussed this w/ your husband at least? I would let him know taht this can't wait & he needs to step up & do it. Then if that falls through, go ahead & talk to him yourself.


mariC67
by on May. 16, 2012 at 3:46 AM
1 mom liked this

I've always talked to my kids and never had a set time or age to have a discussion...if they showed any interest at all in their bodies or asked about where babies came from they were explained in age appropriate detail... opportunities come up all the time to talk to your kids, you just have to listen for it and dont stop trying either. Its embarassing at first but does get easier, now we even joke about sex with our 22yo and his friends cant believe the things we talk openly about.

Saille717
by on May. 16, 2012 at 7:58 AM

To help break the ice, I used a book called: The 'What's Happening To My Body?' Book for Boys.  It helped a lot.  I gave my son the book when he was 9 and we started discussing it in bits and pieces.  If you don't start talking to him, he's going to learn things from his friends...and who knows what kind of misinformation he'll get from them.  It's really awkward at first, but as you talk more and more, you do get more used to it.  

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