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Tween Titans Tween Titans

my daughter got in the middle for no reason

Posted by on Aug. 4, 2012 at 1:54 PM
  • 11 Replies
Two girls (A and B) that were on my softball team that I coached became fast friends....even bffs. well, for the summer, one mom (A) helped the other parents out by watching.her daughter (B) for the summer while they worked. She is very nice and her daughter (A) is such a sweetheart.....wont hurt a fly.

Well, with so much time spent together, I think they are getting on each other's nerves. Well, my daughter is set to spend the night at B's house (she has already spent the night at A's house this summer. My daughter's named somehow got in the middle.of their spat. B told her mom that A said her and Anny were calling B names when she spent the night so B's mom contacted me about it. I was shocked because I don't think my daughter would do that....I'm not foolish to know that she could have been influenced or had a lapse of judgement....so I talked to her. She looked confused. B's mom said she talked.to the other mom. I talked to A's mom too and it sounds like B made it up because she was mad at A and wanted to get A in trouble and used the time my daughter spent the night at A's house....which was like a month ago.

It has since been resolved but I hesitated sending my my daughter there but it sounds like her behavior is stemmed from her bio mom...I guess she is a bit erratic and doesn't treat B well. B's dad ans stepmom finally got full custody.

I think that when B feels betrayed, she doesn't know how to handle it well so she lies. B is also territorial so having more than A as a friend is a big deal. I decided to let my daughter go tonight in hopes that she realizes that friends don't have to be territorial. I think my daughter can be helpful to B because my daughter doesn't lime talking bad about people and maybe B can see that talking bad about people isn't cool.

It's a risk but I think she can handle it well but if something goes wrong.....we are cutting ties.
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by on Aug. 4, 2012 at 1:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Wyldbutterfly
by on Aug. 5, 2012 at 12:49 AM

I'm sorry that your daughter was put in the middle like that. While I think it's nice of you to allow your dd to stay there agian...I hope you told your dd to be careful as all. Girls like that can really start drama. I hope she has fun with no issues.








psych_mom
by on Aug. 5, 2012 at 11:40 AM

Hope that she helps her see that they can all be friends. My dd has a friend that is territorial and was trying to cause issues at her birthday party. It was a huge headache.

kmrtigger
by on Aug. 5, 2012 at 1:09 PM

I think you are handling this situation very well. And it sounds like your daughter is mature enough to handle this situation. And I am sure if it gets to be too much to handle she will come to you for help.

Barabell
by on Aug. 5, 2012 at 3:01 PM

It sounds like a good learning experience for your daughter, however hard it might be. It sounds like the situation was handled well.

M4LG5
by Valeri on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:08 PM


Quoting kmrtigger:

I think you are handling this situation very well. And it sounds like your daughter is mature enough to handle this situation. And I am sure if it gets to be too much to handle she will come to you for help.

My oldest thrives when given a task.....something to be in charge of, to complete, or to handle.  Every year the teachers ask the parents what can they do to help motivate their child and other questions like this.  I always mention to them that you have to give her a task or something to be responsible for and she will work really hard to do it.  This is basically what I did and she did an excellent job.  It sounds like they had A LOT of fun together.

fineyouguyswin
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:13 PM

*sigh* not ready for those ages :/

M4LG5
by Valeri on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:16 PM


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

*sigh* not ready for those ages :/

What's funny is that my husband says, "Why are we dealing with drama?"  I look at him, paused, and said, "Honey, you have 3 girls........expect it."

fineyouguyswin
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:18 PM

lmao right. Ummm...why aren't we honey??lol

Quoting M4LG5:


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

*sigh* not ready for those ages :/

What's funny is that my husband says, "Why are we dealing with drama?"  I look at him, paused, and said, "Honey, you have 3 girls........expect it."


JZB
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:21 PM
Good luck
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KenneMaw
by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 12:58 PM

Girl drama!  I think you are handling it well.  If you dd can explain that just because she is friends with others doesn't mean that she can't be friends with B anymore.   My dd is an only child, so she loves having friends over and does best one on one.   She tries to be careful about talking about one girl to another or explaining what she did with so and so.   Some friends handle it better than others.    It is really hard for the one in the middle and they need to realize the situation isn't their fault.  it is the other person's issue.  I wish the best of luck to the girls!  Hopefully everyone will be happy and settle down a bit.

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