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Tween Titans Tween Titans

Concerned about 9yo DS please advise

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 1:44 PM
  • 9 Replies

Recently my mom told me when she had my 9yo DS & 11yo DD over for the night my DS mentioned killing himself because he doesn't like it "here" (meaning in the world I guess).

Today DS was the ball boy at my 16yo DS's JV soccer game. Even though 9yo was on the other side of the field I could tell the 16yo yelled at him for something & I could see 9yo DS wiping away a tear. Then I saw not only a coach but a ref go up to him (9yo) & talk to him & give him a pat on the back. During half my 11yo DD (who was the other ball kid) ran over to the other side of the field & talked to 9yo. When she came back she said 16yo had yelled at 9yo & 9yo had made a motion as if to stab himself in the heart & wiggle around the (invisible) knife.

I'm concerned because I have never had to deal with this before. Some backstory- my ex & I seperated back in 2006 when 9yo was only 3 at the time & the youngest of 4 kids. We finally divorced this past April, but nothing in our routine has changed much. Infact, since ex & I decided it wasn't working out ex has been coming around alot less (he also has another son that our kids don't know about yet).

I did at one point think my 9yo had ADHD & we saw a behavior specialist who determined that he did not have it but she did seem someunderlying anxiety issues. I chose not to go back to see her (mainly for fear that insurance wouldn't cover the visits). But now I am thinking (especially with school starting) that maybe we should go back & see her?

by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 1:44 PM
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Replies (1-9):
Rogue35
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 3:14 PM
It sounds like something is bothering him. I would be talking to him or telling him to write down how he is feeling. I think I would find him a councler to talk to.
fineyouguyswin
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 8:39 PM

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??

CampClan
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 9:00 PM
Well he has never done well in school to begin with (repeated 2nd grade & is now going into 3rd). This past year the pediatrician suggested he get an official learning diisabilities evaluation. The school psychologist said because he had made significant gains over the course of the year she did not feel there was a need (said if he had made no progress at all or went backwards then she would).

I think I am going to call the behavior counselor we had seen before. Just because my church is between pastors right now & the only youth that is really a true leader is my 16yo. WHO btw did tell me the 1st chance he got went over & apologized to my 9yo because he realized he had yelled pretty bad.


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
fineyouguyswin
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 9:02 PM
1 mom liked this

What state are you in?? I'm in Texas I know here a group called Speco handles all this stuff. If you go down to your district office they may be able to tell you. You can request a parent requested evaluation. They HAVE to evaluate him if you request it.

Quoting CampClan:

Well he has never done well in school to begin with (repeated 2nd grade & is now going into 3rd). This past year the pediatrician suggested he get an official learning diisabilities evaluation. The school psychologist said because he had made significant gains over the course of the year she did not feel there was a need (said if he had made no progress at all or went backwards then she would).

I think I am going to call the behavior counselor we had seen before. Just because my church is between pastors right now & the only youth that is really a true leader is my 16yo. WHO btw did tell me the 1st chance he got went over & apologized to my 9yo because he realized he had yelled pretty bad.


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??


CampClan
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 9:40 PM
Ugh! I'm on mobile & my phone is acting crazy. Let's see if I can do this again.

At the beginning of his 2nd year in 2nd grade we were told his skills were mid to end of 1st grade level. At the end of the year he was mid to end of 2nd grade level. Since he made signifcant gains they saw no reason to evaluate.

His grades are not the concern here- it's his attitude/seemingly suicidal thoughts.


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

What state are you in?? I'm in Texas I know here a group called Speco handles all this stuff. If you go down to your district office they may be able to tell you. You can request a parent requested evaluation. They HAVE to evaluate him if you request it.

Quoting CampClan:

Well he has never done well in school to begin with (repeated 2nd grade & is now going into 3rd). This past year the pediatrician suggested he get an official learning diisabilities evaluation. The school psychologist said because he had made significant gains over the course of the year she did not feel there was a need (said if he had made no progress at all or went backwards then she would).



I think I am going to call the behavior counselor we had seen before. Just because my church is between pastors right now & the only youth that is really a true leader is my 16yo. WHO btw did tell me the 1st chance he got went over & apologized to my 9yo because he realized he had yelled pretty bad.




Quoting fineyouguyswin:

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
CampClan
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 9:41 PM
BTW- I'm in Ohio

Quoting fineyouguyswin:

What state are you in?? I'm in Texas I know here a group called Speco handles all this stuff. If you go down to your district office they may be able to tell you. You can request a parent requested evaluation. They HAVE to evaluate him if you request it.

Quoting CampClan:

Well he has never done well in school to begin with (repeated 2nd grade & is now going into 3rd). This past year the pediatrician suggested he get an official learning diisabilities evaluation. The school psychologist said because he had made significant gains over the course of the year she did not feel there was a need (said if he had made no progress at all or went backwards then she would).



I think I am going to call the behavior counselor we had seen before. Just because my church is between pastors right now & the only youth that is really a true leader is my 16yo. WHO btw did tell me the 1st chance he got went over & apologized to my 9yo because he realized he had yelled pretty bad.




Quoting fineyouguyswin:

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
kblpooh
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 9:50 PM
You need to take your son to the local hospital to have him evaluated immediately. This is not something to wait and see.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
fineyouguyswin
by on Aug. 26, 2012 at 9:41 AM

We have many students who are EXTREMLY intelligent but still suffer from things like autism, adhd, bipolar and more. School psychologists are very very trained in finding those. All of them can cause suicidal thoughts and struggles in schools because they see how different they are from others or even how different their thinking is.

Quoting CampClan:

Ugh! I'm on mobile & my phone is acting crazy. Let's see if I can do this again.

At the beginning of his 2nd year in 2nd grade we were told his skills were mid to end of 1st grade level. At the end of the year he was mid to end of 2nd grade level. Since he made signifcant gains they saw no reason to evaluate.

His grades are not the concern here- it's his attitude/seemingly suicidal thoughts.


Quoting fineyouguyswin:

What state are you in?? I'm in Texas I know here a group called Speco handles all this stuff. If you go down to your district office they may be able to tell you. You can request a parent requested evaluation. They HAVE to evaluate him if you request it.

Quoting CampClan:

Well he has never done well in school to begin with (repeated 2nd grade & is now going into 3rd). This past year the pediatrician suggested he get an official learning diisabilities evaluation. The school psychologist said because he had made significant gains over the course of the year she did not feel there was a need (said if he had made no progress at all or went backwards then she would).



I think I am going to call the behavior counselor we had seen before. Just because my church is between pastors right now & the only youth that is really a true leader is my 16yo. WHO btw did tell me the 1st chance he got went over & apologized to my 9yo because he realized he had yelled pretty bad.




Quoting fineyouguyswin:

Since he is in school have the school evaluate him. You can talk with the principal or counselor and they will help him find the right place and if needed medication to help calm his feelings. How are his grades normally??



TempestRayne
by on Aug. 26, 2012 at 5:14 PM
Quoting kblpooh:

You need to take your son to the local hospital to have him evaluated immediately. This is not something to wait and see.

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