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Tween Titans Tween Titans

Open fridge policy

Posted by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 10:52 AM
  • 81 Replies

Yesterday DH was complaining to dd about how some of her friends always seem to come to our house to eat and then leave. I tried giving him a look behind her back, waved my arms, made shooshing gestures but he just kept going, saying that she needed to tell her friends to back off, we're not feeding the whole neighborhood. After his tirade I took him aside and explained reality to him, that although we are far from well off, many of our dd's friends live in households where there is little money, food stamps get sold for drug money, parents are often absent, etc. No we can't afford to feed all dd's friends but we're gonna do it anyway. He says it's not our responsibility to take care of everyone else's kids. I think when it comes to making sure kids are fed, it is very much all of our responsibilities. Do you have an open fridge policy in your house? If you don't is it because you can't afford it or some other reason?

by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 10:52 AM
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M4LG5
by Valeri on Sep. 6, 2012 at 10:57 AM
7 moms liked this

No, we don't have an open fridge policy in our house even for our own kids.  Outside of meals, they need to ask permission.  The reason I have them ask permission is because I don't want them snacking all the time.  Also, there are things that I bought specifically for certain meals that I don't want them getting into or sweets that are given only for certain times (i.e. after dinner).

Other adults are often surprised when my kids ask permission to get food.  I'm not strict and often say yes but i just don't want them to get into the habit of going in the fridge anytime they want.

As for your situation, feeding them snacks is one thing....letting them go into your fridge anytime they want is another.

If you do feel that you do need to feed them, prepare a snack time for all of them or a meal time for all of the kids there and do it at the same time. 

Barabell
by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 11:04 AM
1 mom liked this

We have an open fridge policy. My son knows not to eat too much when snacking, and if it gets close to a meal time, he'll ask first before getting a snack.

His friends don't live in our neighborhood though, and so they aren't in our house every day. He usually has a friend over once every week or two. One week this summer, he had 3 kids over within one week (two spent the night) but not all at the same time, and that was usual.

psych_mom
by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 11:05 AM

No, we do let our kids snack when they are hungry and I would feed another kid if they came into my house hungry, but I like to know where my food is going so I know what needs to be replaced and when.

nursemc
by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 11:11 AM

I guess open policy was the wrong phrase for me to use. I totally agree with what you're saying. They can't eat whatever they want whenever they want. I keep certain things that everyone is welcome to and I'm not spoiling anyone's dinner. It's just that the girl in particular he was complaining about the most doesn't get dinner on a consistent basis and many of dd's friends, I know there is nothing or very little to eat in their house. I work nights so I'm home when they get out of school and I make sure everyone gets an after school snack.

Quoting M4LG5:

No, we don't have an open fridge policy in our house even for our own kids.  Outside of meals, they need to ask permission.  The reason I have them ask permission is because I don't want them snacking all the time.  Also, there are things that I bought specifically for certain meals that I don't want them getting into or sweets that are given only for certain times (i.e. after dinner).

Other adults are often surprised when my kids ask permission to get food.  I'm not strict and often say yes but i just don't want them to get into the habit of going in the fridge anytime they want.

As for your situation, feeding them snacks is one thing....letting them go into your fridge anytime they want is another.

If you do feel that you do need to feed them, prepare a snack time for all of them or a meal time for all of the kids there and do it at the same time. 


fineyouguyswin
by on Sep. 6, 2012 at 7:39 PM

I do not have an open fridge policy. However all my kids friends never come over. and if they did we are likely the poorest of them all.

SahmTam
by Member on Sep. 6, 2012 at 8:37 PM

 My kids basically do (with just select items that they are allowed, though). I wouldn't have that policy for kids that just stop by- my kids have food allergies- I would worry about that. And we really can't feed that many kids!

diaperstodating
by Angel on Sep. 6, 2012 at 8:40 PM

Yes we have an open fridge policy in our house.

diaperstodating
by Angel on Sep. 6, 2012 at 8:40 PM

This

Quoting Barabell:

We have an open fridge policy. My son knows not to eat too much when snacking, and if it gets close to a meal time, he'll ask first before getting a snack.

His friends don't live in our neighborhood though, and so they aren't in our house every day. He usually has a friend over once every week or two. One week this summer, he had 3 kids over within one week (two spent the night) but not all at the same time, and that was usual.


cocoroo
by Bronze Member on Sep. 6, 2012 at 8:48 PM
No one just goes in my fridge and gets whatever they want, not even my own children. I would say something to my child about her friends. My children know their friends are their responsibility when at our house. I pay to feed my children, no one else's. Sleepovers and parties are different.
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catngabsmom
by Erica on Sep. 6, 2012 at 10:27 PM
6 moms liked this
I don't have an open door policy, but it isn't closed either. I live in a fairly upscale community, so friends not being able to afford food isn't an issue. My youngest dd does have two friends though who's families are going through very difficult financial issues, I know they have food in the house, but it is enough to get by on with very little extra. When those friends are over, I "open" the door for them without being obvious. I have "accidentally" cooked a double batch, "realized" it was "far too much" for my family and sent the "leftovers" home with them.
My own kids have an open door policy, but they aren't grazers, know what they can and can't have, but they have never taken advantage of it. If there is something I need for a specific purpose, I make them aware, but for the most part I buy food to be eaten, I can always buy more. If they do eat all of the snacks or "junk foods" they know those don't get replaced till I grocery shop again.
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