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Tween Titans Tween Titans

How are you different from your parents?

Posted by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:17 PM
  • 18 Replies

I was very influenced by my parents in many ways, especially involvement.  I do have to say there are things that I'm very different from them as well. 

For example, dinner time was family time.  My mom just put food on the table, called our names, we got food and went back to what we were doing.  Sometimes some of us would eat at the table but most of the time we ate in front of the TV.  When I heard my friends talk about dinners with their families (eating at the dinner table), I found it so different.

Well, today, we eat dinner at the table together.....NO TV.  We go around the table and talk about each other's day. 

Also, we never really had limits (unless we were getting out of hand) but I do.  It worked to not really have limits growing up - such as specific bedtimes, soda, etc - but, for me and my husband, it works for us to have these limits.

What about you?  What's are the differences between you and your parents?

by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
steelcrazy
by Silver Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:29 PM

I'm sorta the opposite of you.  lol  I grew up in an incredibly strict househould.  There were rules and limits on everything and it drove me crazy.  So I am a lot more lax with my boys than my parents were.  Not saying that we don't have rules, but the world won't come to an end if you don't clean your bedroom on Saturday morning before doing anything else.  The world also won't end if you stay in your pajamas and veg out all day long.

We do eat dinner at the table as a family every night though, I enjoy our conversations so much.  On special occasions, we have a dinner picnic on the familyroom floor.  The boys really love that.

M4LG5
by Valeri on Jan. 28, 2013 at 4:07 PM


Quoting steelcrazy:

I'm sorta the opposite of you.  lol  I grew up in an incredibly strict househould.  There were rules and limits on everything and it drove me crazy.  So I am a lot more lax with my boys than my parents were.  Not saying that we don't have rules, but the world won't come to an end if you don't clean your bedroom on Saturday morning before doing anything else.  The world also won't end if you stay in your pajamas and veg out all day long.

We do eat dinner at the table as a family every night though, I enjoy our conversations so much.  On special occasions, we have a dinner picnic on the familyroom floor.  The boys really love that.

We are not very strict either.  We have our routines and limits and try to follow them but we know sometimes its easier to say "okay, go ahead" then it is to enforce it.  I feel like I'm a happy medium between "strict" and "no routine".

Babujai
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 4:22 PM

 I'm no where near as strict and restrictive as my parents were.

M4LG5
by Valeri on Jan. 28, 2013 at 5:13 PM

I just realized another one........growing up, I saw a divide in responsiblities between my mom and dad.  It was very common to see my dad on the couch watching TV while all of us girls would clean.  Some days when it was those cleaning days, my dad would take my brother out to golf or fish......little did he know that we ALWAYS saved him the crap job of picking up dog poop outside.

In our house, my husband and I are both very involved in cleaning the house and cooking.

mamavalor
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 6:37 PM

We are at about the same level of strictness and relaxness but different in regards to priorities and what really matters.  I never really understood what my parents wanted from me and my sisters.  We were damned if we did and damned if we didn't.  Females were certainly second class citizens at my parents' house.  That is until I became of age.  And then my father was in a for BIG surprise, and still is. :)

My focus is clearer and more honest with my children.  They are certainly more confident, easy-going, and happy than when I was a kid.

M4LG5
by Valeri on Jan. 28, 2013 at 6:39 PM


Quoting mamavalor:

We are at about the same level of strictness and relaxness but different in regards to priorities and what really matters.  I never really understood what my parents wanted from me and my sisters.  We were damned if we did and damned if we didn't.  Females were certainly second class citizens at my parents' house.  That is until I became of age.  And then my father was in a for BIG surprise, and still is. :)

My focus is clearer and more honest with my children.  They are certainly more confident, easy-going, and happy than when I was a kid.

I'm definitely more honest with them too.  My parents never talked to me about the changes that I will be going through or sex.  I just kinda had to go with it when it happened.

steelcrazy
by Silver Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:34 PM

The "me time" post reminded me of another way that I am very different from my parents.  My children know that I am a person other than just their mom.  I have friends and interests and do things that don't involve them or their activities.  My every waking moment doesn't revolve around my kids and taking care of them.

psych_mom
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:46 PM

It was the same way in my house- my step dad would have had a heart attack if he would have had to prepare a meal or doing any house work. My husband cooks and cleans and never complains at all. Very opposite of when I was growing up. Although, my mom made my brother and step brothers do it as well.

Quoting M4LG5:

I just realized another one........growing up, I saw a divide in responsiblities between my mom and dad.  It was very common to see my dad on the couch watching TV while all of us girls would clean.  Some days when it was those cleaning days, my dad would take my brother out to golf or fish......little did he know that we ALWAYS saved him the crap job of picking up dog poop outside.

In our house, my husband and I are both very involved in cleaning the house and cooking.


psych_mom
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:48 PM

I am the same way. My mom lost her identity of who she was when I was a kid and growing up. She still doesn't know who she is or what makes her happy any more. I don't want to be that way when my kids are grown so I make sure to make time for myself and do things that I enjoy.

Quoting steelcrazy:

The "me time" post reminded me of another way that I am very different from my parents.  My children know that I am a person other than just their mom.  I have friends and interests and do things that don't involve them or their activities.  My every waking moment doesn't revolve around my kids and taking care of them.


psych_mom
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:50 PM

I grew up in a home with a lot of fussing, arguing and chaos. I don't like that in my home. Mat and I have disagreements, but we don't let them get personal, we talk things through and we move on. We work on our marriage daily and he truly is my best friend and I want to still know who he is each day.

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