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Tween Titans Tween Titans

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Posted by on May. 30, 2007 at 4:43 PM
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My 11 year old daughter ran away yesterday. She didn't go far (less the 100 yards to my dads house) but still she ran away. Upon her return she told me that I broke a promise to her and she hates me. Apparently she remembers me supposedly promising her years ago that I would never get married, that there would never be a man in my life. I don't remember making such a promise as it is not something I could promise. I have a new friend in my life, at this point that is all it is...friendship but may possibly grow to more and she wants me to end it. I love my children dearly but is it wrong of me to want some adult happiness to? He is great with my kids, they have known him most of their lives...it's not as if he is a stranger to them.
My kids spend ALOT of time with my sister (because of my work), so much so that I believe they like her more. I asked her (my daughter)  if she thought that when I am not at work that I should be sitting at home waiting for them to decide to spend time with me...she said yes. I was devestated! Apparently mom's are not supposed to have lives...My number one priority in life is to make my children happy....but how can I do that when she doesn't want me to be?  I know it's a tweenaged thing but I want to try to fix it....any suggestions?
by on May. 30, 2007 at 4:43 PM
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MoonWitch_Mom
by on May. 31, 2007 at 3:21 PM
Hello there, I am a Mother who recently got remarried three years ago, and when I first started dating my son wasn't all that happy about it, even though like your children both mine knew and liked the man I was beginning to date.
When I encountered the resentment I turned to both my kids and asked them will they never be moving out of the house, and never have any other friends besides me because I was afraid to grow old all alone if they left me and moved on with their lives when they were out of school. I also asked them never to have a boy friend or girl friend because what would I do if they loved someone else and not me?! Role reversal does not work with all kids but it did work with mine. I also had my sister in law, who watched them for me while I was at work, talk to them about me possibly dating and she helped them work through their anxieties and encouraged them to encourage me to spread my wings and fly into my adult life with other adults.
Hope that helps just a little.
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