Help! My 12 y.o. girl is dressing like a tramp!

[ddbz]

Suddenly this year, my daughter has started wearing very short skirts and shorts, revealing shirts (the ones with the multiple bra-straps) and tight everything. I was with her when she bought these clothes and somehow didn't realize how inappropriate they were until I saw her wearing them at school.
She insists that everyone else dresses that way, but I can see that they are not. She is also taking pictures of herself that look very mature, and we discovered her MySpace page, where she is posting these photos of herself and claiming to be 14 y.o.
The other day, we made her change out of a very tiny skirt and into a pair of pants, and when she came home in the afternoon, she was wearing the tiny skirt!
I keep telling Daniel (my husband, her father) that we are no longer her friend, we are her parents. And we are going to have to take away most of her clothes and buy new ones for her $$OUCH!$$.
Is anyone else dealing with this?

[Desire1010]

I have a 12yr old too and I'm not really dealing with her dressing like a tramp but I sure know what you're talking about. Alot of the kids these days are wearing clothes from Abercrombie and hollister and I think the clothes are made for elves!! Have you seen how small the shorts are in those store? I told one of the clerks that they should be half off cause there was only a hlf a pair of shorts!! Anyway it is tough especially if she is trying to keep up with the other girls in her grade. I would tell her that she either picks more appropriate clothes to wear or you and dad will have to dress her everyday until she does. I promise she won't want that and she'll find something that she can wear and still feel comfortable in!

[elysee]

OMG my daughter is the same way. She is 14 and has developed quite well so anything looks like that on her. It has been a constant struggle!!!

[cdgoldilocks]

 I know all about this problem. Some of my daughter's friends dress trashy. They also have myspace pages with inappropriate songs and backgrounds that say "sexy" or have playgirl bunnies on the back. My daughter wants to fit in with some of these girls, as they have become popular. I made a myspace page so I could add her friends and monitor what they are doing LOL.  

My suggestion to you is to make sure you go with your daughter every time you shop for clothes. Make sure she tries everything on and shows you the outfit while she is wearing it. If she won't show you, then you don't buy it. If you don't approve, she doesn't get the outfit.

My daughter is 11, so I KNOW how much they whine when they don't get what they want. This subject, however, is one of the few topics we don't argue about. My kid knows that I have final say and I will not budge.

My other suggestion to you would be to get rid of those inappropriate outfits and take her to buy some more. I don't know where you live, but summer is upon us and you may not have to worry about this for a few months.

Is she going into 7th grade? This will be a VERY big shopping year for her. Maybe you guys can make an afternoon of it. Make it a bonding thing. Good luck!

[busybee671011]

I had the same problem with my daughter she is 11 she was wearing shorts on Monday that were so short I made her change before she went to school. She went on and on saying how I was so mean to make her change.

As for the myspace I think you have to be 14 to have one. Thats probadly why she has her age as 14. You would would be surprised how many 5th and 6th graders have myspace.

[spoiled2]

Yep that's me too. My daughter is 12 soon to be 13 & yes she is tiny but still. Mine started doing the same as putting things in her backpack so I started checking her backpack before she left the house so that put an end to that. The shorts you can't even buy them hardly without being to short so now I buy her pants take them to grandma's (who is a seamstress) & she cuts them off to make the length I like.Or she adds mateial to the bottom of her shorts to make them longer. The one thing that My daughter has recently started is when she's wearing her tank tops I've noticed she sits or stand with her arms kinda tight to her side so it pushes her boobs up to have cleavage.  Aahhhh As for the my space I wouldn't let my child have access to the internet with out me knowing so a myspace is out of the ?.

[ddbz]

Spoiled 2-
You made me laugh!
Girls-
Thanks for getting back to me about this - I'm glad that I'm not alone.
What happened was that my husband and I sat her down for a serious browbeating session. We took away the miniskirts. We got some ugly attitude. We gave her a sermon on trust.
What I didn't tell her was that this incident just opened the doors for me to become the snooping-est mother on earth.
We shall now begin our descent into the Tween/Teen Parenting World.
                                                      

[luvinmygrls]

Let me just say... OMG!  I understand to an extent what you are going through. My 10 year old tries to get away with that. She also knows we have the final word on what she wears and  how she wears it. I am pretty flexible with alot of things (hair style, color, peircings ect. ) but stand my ground with clothes. I would go through your daughters closet with her there and then get rid off all the inappropriate clothing and buy her appropriate clothing . If you need to go to good will or consignment places. that is what I would do if my child dressed like that.