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Tween Titans Tween Titans

Lying????

Posted by on Jun. 13, 2007 at 11:53 PM
  • 5 Replies
My 12 year old has recently started to lie.
Usually about little things--Did you pick up the towel from the floor etc...
But now, I  get a message from the school, letting me know she hasn't turned in her homework!!!
I know she does it--I see her!
I know it gets into her backpack for school.
All the teachers say what a great kid she is--never a problem in school, friendly, participates--gets 92 or above on all her tests/quizzes.
I have no idea why.
I want to be ab;e to trust her, but I'm afraid that if she lies about little things, wht will happen when something big comes along???
I have never spanked her.
And try to be positive.
What can I do?
WHY is she lying?
by on Jun. 13, 2007 at 11:53 PM
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Replies (1-5):
sh44s
by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 12:21 AM
Welcome to middle school.  I don't know why your child is not turning in completed homework.  Maybe it's peer pressure to be cool by being aloof or maybe she's forgetting it.    You're not alone with the lying though.  I am a middle school teacher and parent, and I see it in all types of children.  If the teachers are saying she's a good kid, you need to focus on that.  Trust me, they would tell you otherwise.  As a teacher, if a parent came to me with these concerns, I would tell them to focus on positive.  It is a HARD time for middle school kids, and they are in the process of discovering who they are.  If her grades drop or attitude changes, then there's a problem.   Encourage her to choose friends and remain friends with those who have the same values.  I don't know if that was much help. 
Sweetmom191
by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 12:26 AM
Wow. That is EXACTLY what my 13 year old daughter is doing! She lives with her dad a couple hours away. When I do visit with her and talking on the phone with her I know she's lying and it breaks my heart because she's not raised that way. Unfortunately some of the reasons are peer pressure and some is because how strict her dad is. He told her flat out she wouldn't have a social life and now she's gone to extremes. She's so not the daughter I remember! Ever since she started school she has loved it! The last year she's hated it and is barely making it to high school next year. I hope things go better for your daughter. Hopefully it's just a phase. Good luck.
premiergymmom
by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 12:15 PM
I feel the pain.  I have been struggling with my oldest since middle school with not turning in his homework.  He will be a senior in the fall and still has a paper that he needs to go to school and work on from this spring.

Keep the line of communication open with the child and teachers.  Teachers have been my strongest allies in this fight.

When things got really bad, my husband, mother, father and I took turns going to school and spending the day with my son.  This only lasted 3 days and then he got a little better.

If anybody has any other tricks let us know.
momjosie
by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 8:27 PM
my son had exact same thing  He was forgetting to turn it in  maybe she needs help remembering or maybe there is something keeping her mind busy
Brehi
by on Jun. 19, 2007 at 4:02 PM
            My tween does noy lie to me and I'm hoping that she won't start but my seven year old has started to lie to me about a month ago.
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