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How do you disipline your tween boy for this mouthy attitute?

Posted by on Jul. 14, 2007 at 1:16 PM
  • 16 Replies
Hello girls!  I dont know what to do with my mouthy ass boy. I have tried everything but the only thing that does any good is letting my husband spank his ass. he is to big for a spanking but damn it its either that or I am gonna drop kick him sometime.LOL
He's not always mouthy, most times he is a non mouthy kid. Oh and teen boys do sweat like nasty asses!
by on Jul. 14, 2007 at 1:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
CubScoutMom3
by on Jul. 14, 2007 at 10:53 PM
I take away Kory's Pokemon stuff, AND his Gameboy Advance along with ALL of his games... If I get upset enough, I also take away other privileges like TV and phone. Sometimes he'll get the hint and try to beg for his stuff back... He's 9 1/2.
Michelle
becc
by on Jul. 15, 2007 at 2:36 AM
I wish I could say that at his age things will get better, trust me I have vented on friends and family and almost reached the end of my rope as well. My oldest boy is 16 as of last month. He entered the "I don't have to take this crap" stage at about 9yrs old and he is still in it. I have tried everything, friends at church tell me to pray harder, friends at a restaurant I go to every Sun. morning tell me bust his butt more often, doesn't work- just created resentment, I haven't found any thing yet. Lots of patients, understanding, crying, and letting some things go.... might help eventually. Hopefully we can all find answers and friends in here.
boyzmom112
by on Jul. 15, 2007 at 2:49 AM
I can honestly tell you that I work his hindend off!
I have a 13 year old and a 9 year old and when they start that mouthy crap I put them to work.
And depending on how bad their mouth runs is depending on how bad I will work them.
I tell them that if they are going to talk and act like the grown up then they will work and earn their keep like one!
hey it works here
One time they were very bad about it and I have a steep bank that is behind my house, I sent them down there with the kid scissors and told them I did not want to find one weed or piece of brush on it.  If I did I was trashing the video games.
It took them about three days until I gave in and they have not mouthed me or anyone else for about six months now.
I wish you luck because not everything works for everyone.

Happy-Duckof6
by on Jul. 15, 2007 at 3:01 AM
good luck! I have a 16 year old- good boy, doesn't talk back... 13 year old girl-good girl doesnt talk back...

but the 11 year old boy- well, hard headed and his favorite word is "why" and " i don't care, so what".. if i take it away- he will help me pack it up- if i say, lets throw it away -= he says fine, do it.... if i say, lets bust your butt- he says fine- i'll call child protective services, i would reither live with them than with you anyway... i have tried it all- grounding, working his butt off- and trust me- he will just sit there and say "make me"... "I am not doing it".... stand him in the corner, at the table all day, no tv, no video games, no friends, no phone, nothing works! --- i pray about it- i ask the preacher- i get religious about it- and say "what would jesus do?"... nothing works!

Thank GOD- most of the time he is very very good- caring, loving, sweet- but sometimes- he just flat out - says no-and I don't care!....

Sorry, i have no answers-if anyone has some or can offer me help, let me know- I am thinking about couseling and talking to our pedi about does he need to be put on medicine.. does he have add? adhd? autism? can't figure it out!  They tried him on strattera-- anxiety/add med.. but it made it worse!!!

be patient- as i am---- i have wonderful kids and a great husband- 95% of the time-- but somedays i just want to cry about how i am treated so bad!
  I try to remember that "parenting" is what it is - and no one said it was going to be easy!....

Add me as a friend to chat anytime!  I am here for you!
wlbunny
by on Jul. 16, 2007 at 10:09 AM
Well it looks like alot  of us if not all of us are in the same boat. My son will be 10 next month and let me tell you the last year has gotten worse. He has now started  to cus me and his dad out and tells us he hate us and he is going to run away but i just remind him we love him very much and he cant do any thing to change that. Spanking him makes him just  yell and hates us more. The best thing we found is just let him cool off then we tallk to him in a normal tone voice and get down to the point of whats bothering him.  We tried grounding, spanking taking tv and games away and even went all the way and left only a pillow and blanket in his room and still he cares less. Hope you can find what works best for you... Remember it will eventully get better but might get worse frist but we will survive..
wendy1466
by on Jul. 16, 2007 at 10:56 PM
My 12 year old has started this and I have a couple of ways that I handle it.  I put him to work like the other mom said and if he argues I tell him that I only argue at 10 o'clock (so far he hasn't chosen to argue with me at 10).  By the time 10 o'clock rolls around he has forgotten what he wanted to argue about.  Sounds weird, but it works!  If he ever chooses to argue at 10, I will be using the argument that if he wants to act like an adult...he can work like one.  The other thing I do is tell him that I will be happy to talk to him when his voice is as calm as mine and I refuse to listen to him until it is--this works really well for me, but I am not sure why?  I tried taking privileges away but this made him resentful and angry and more moody.  Hope this helps as he is my oldest, I am figuring this out as I go!
stolz4
by on Jul. 17, 2007 at 3:08 AM
My husband and I were at our wits end with our 11 yr old son. We tried everything but nothing seemed to work. Now that it's nice out and there is no school we decided to try something different, good old fashioned work. He was mouthy last week my husband had him dig up an old gardening area so we can plant grass. It took him three days and he was miserable but when he realized that he wasn't going to be able to do anything else except eat, sleep and go to the bathroom he started to pick up the pace. This past Saturday his started up again so we found another outside project to do. Again, he was miserable but neither one of us backed down and he finally got to work, it only took 2 days this time. After he was done we explained to him that this was going to be his new form of punishment. Screw around and get put to work; dirty, sweaty work. Behave and you'll get to do the fun stuff. I think he is finally getting it. He would rather be playing in the pool, riding his bike w/ friends or playing video games then doing manual labor in the yard. Part of me is hoping he mouths of again so I can get another outside project done, lol.
OverItNow
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 8:32 AM
I love using the work thing too and it does work.  I have a garden and there are LOTS I mean LOTS of rocks in it.  Depending on the crime, depends on how many buckets of rocks he has to pick out of the garden.  I like weeding too!
MusikMama
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 8:40 AM
I was just reading a story in Chicken Soup for the Mothers soul about how a boys mom would write him little note and stick them in an envelope that said "Open when alone" as she put it under his pillow.  HE was going thru a phase of defiiance etc. when this started.  He said for years, he would find those notes, and they really touched him,even though he NEVER even mentioned to his mom that he had read them or even seen them.

Maybe try writing him a note when emotions won't be involved so fiercly, he just might listen.

I encourage my kids (11 year SD) to write me a note if she want s to talk to me about something but doesn't want to face to face and stick it in my purse.  Then I write her back.

~Kate~

http://www.cafemom.com/group/detox

"The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have"


mimiswanson
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 10:18 PM
I love the outside manual labor idea. I am too having problem and all I have are threats for my 10 year old.
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