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daughter is driving me crazy

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she is getting a divorce (her idea) from a wonderful man who i love like he was my own son.  she has a boyfriend who bought her a house and will soon move in with her and my granddaughter age 8.  my granddaughter is my main concern.  she seems excited about the move because she;s been promised a new phone a new dog and new bedroom.  but she doesn't understand what the impact will be on her life.  my daughter is not forthcoming at all with me.  she won't let me meet the boyfriend and she just acts very secretive about the whole thing.  she is 39 years old and she's acting like a teenager.  i asked her yesterday what the custody agreement was and she said it's none of my buisness.  there is something really fishy about all this.  i would like any advice or thoughts about this.  thank you very much for reading this.

by on May. 2, 2012 at 7:31 AM
Replies (11-19):
Celeste611
by on May. 3, 2012 at 3:54 AM

I thankfully had not had to deal with a situation like this but I think all you can do is try to keep a level head when you are dealing with your daughter so she will not keep you from seeing your granddaughter. My heart felt wishes are with you. Take care 

EmilyMarshall
by on May. 3, 2012 at 3:58 AM
1 mom liked this
sorry


LadySaphira
by Lisa on May. 3, 2012 at 5:40 AM

Same here

Quoting Celeste611:

I thankfully had not had to deal with a situation like this but I think all you can do is try to keep a level head when you are dealing with your daughter so she will not keep you from seeing your granddaughter. My heart felt wishes are with you. Take care 


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gmadiane
by on May. 3, 2012 at 11:43 AM

I hope everything works out for all of you

amylulu1
by Amy on May. 3, 2012 at 12:23 PM

 I tend to agree with Coey on this...I am the daughter of a very critical mother.  I honestly wish that I had the balls to tell her none of her business sometimes.  I am not saying, OP, that you are critical, however, there is a reason that she has been secretive and/or rude to you about this situation.  She may be feeling self-conscious about her decision already and all of your questions may have made her uncomfortable.  Sometimes it's not what you ask, but how you ask.  She is an adult and very capable of making her own decisions and should not have to run it by someone else before, during, or after making the decision.   If you are worried about your granddaughter, I would just let her know that you are there for her if she wants to discuss her feelings about mom & dad getting divorced. 

I'm sorry that your feelings are hurt, but you have your own life to live and you shouldn't stress yourself over her life and decisions.   I have a daughter with a grandchild and have had to decide that I can't live her life or agonize over her decisions- she needs to do it herself- I will just be there if she needs me...

DixieL
by Dixie on May. 3, 2012 at 1:00 PM

I don't blame you for being nervous. Even though your daughter isn't saying anything, don't they say kids and animals have a sense for people. If that is true it sounds like your granddaugher likes him. Maybe it will turn out well.It sounds like you daughter is just trying to be hateful about this.Good Luck

Shellness
by Michell on May. 3, 2012 at 3:47 PM

 Can't you talk to the father of your Granddaughter?

DesignGirl450
by Lynda on May. 3, 2012 at 9:24 PM

Actually, the custody agreement really is  none of your business.  Maybe she is being evasive because she knows how much you love her husband, but this is her life, and decisions to make.   I hope her daughter will be ok. 

rosebud727
by Rose on May. 5, 2012 at 1:58 AM

Well unless you were in her marriage 24/7 you didn't live her life and she has reasons for divorcing. Are you two close, or does normally not include you in her private matters? Maybe because you are so against this divorce she has elected to not confide in you.

To be honest, telling you something is none of your business is not rude, unless of course it's said in a rude way, imo.

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