Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Moms with Adult Kids Moms with Adult Kids

Common courtesy or none of your business? Update question.....

Posted by   + Show Post

Just a question.....

If your married adult child goes out of town/state for the weekend, is it common courtesy to let you (as his/her parent)? Or is it none of your business? 
Let me rephrase: Is it common courtesy or none of your business, to let you know that they are going out of town. Not what they're doing, just to inform you they're going. 

With lastest technolgy of cell phones and things, does anyone take into consideration that cell phones die, and/or lose signal? Does this play into the safety/ emergency issue?

                                          
                                               Angels Lending A Helping Hand 

                                
          

by on Jun. 11, 2012 at 12:34 PM
Replies (111-119):
Bmat
by Barb on Jun. 15, 2012 at 9:41 AM

They should inform you of where they can be reached, and the same goes the other way, when you are going out of town they need to know.

bertie4
by on Jun. 15, 2012 at 3:26 PM

I think it's nice to know they will be gone. I tell my Mom and in laws when we go anywhere for more than a day. My adult kids tell me, not details, just they will be gone. Lots of time they are excited to be going and just talking about it in conversation. It's nice to have someone keep an eye on the house, pick up mail etc.

CoeyG
by on Jun. 15, 2012 at 4:13 PM


Quoting mariC67:


Quoting CoeyG:


Quoting DixieL:

Common courtesy. If my son disappeared without telling me I would be scard to death. He always tells me where he is going and about when he will be back

In this day and age it is a bit difficult for an adult to "disappear" unless someone removes them from the face of the earth.  There are cellphones, Ipohnes, Ipads all kinds of communication devices I've heard tell that you can access the internet on your laptop in your car now.  When Shannon and I came cross country from Caliofnria almost 5 years ago we got a flat tire, pulled over, pulled out the cell phone and dialed AAA, within a half hour I was heaed to the nearest Firestone place to get a free tire because they were still under warantee.  Shannon's dad knew we were heading this way so that evening Shannon called to let him know that we'd probably be a day later than we had planned because of it.  There was no reason to contact anyone else regarding the flat tire, not much anyone else could do about it.  Yes people knew we were moving here but that is because we were moving not just goihg out of town.  Like I said, I have people who love me, but they don't need to know every time I fart.

You are quite wrong there as far as it being difficult to disappear..modern technology just makes it easier to stay in touch with those that want to be connected. I live in a rural area and there are many places around me where there are no cell phone signals, hell I get not even 3 miles out of town and I lose my signal, if I break down I'l be walking and many times I've been on stretches of road where there is nothing at all and many times after dark I've seen hogs, panthers, black bears, coyotes or wild dogs and gators, either on the road or on the shoulder. You could sit there for hours before some one came along and then god knows who that could be. Not to long ago they pulled a car out of a canal not far from here that had the remains of a woman still inside it. She had been missing for over 2 years. Those canals have dark water in them and you cant see more than a foot below the surface. Things can and do happen unfortunately, I know it probably wouldnt have saved the womans life but if someone had known where she was going the family could have put things to rest sooner.

Okay so you sit in your car for hours waiting for help.  This is why you keep your car prepared for such events like I do.  I have a suitcase in my car at all times that has a first aid kit, blanket, even a change of clothes.  It has all kinds of things in it for my needs. including two O2 tanks and a several means of opening them and I also carry severl of those means in the glove box and on my person at all times.  I'm on O2 24/7/365 and yet I don't feel the need to tell anyone that I'm going out of town when I do...if "God forbid" happens that would probably mean that "God" had already planned it.  

lisamarie1265
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 12:53 AM
1 mom liked this
Quoting CoeyG:




You can prep your car all you want all of our vehicles have the necessary items in them, i.e. first aid kits, car safety kits, blankets, tools to cut the seat belt, smash a window ect.... All of that cannot protect you from a car jacker, or an accident that could render you unconscious..ect telling family and friends where your going to be is a safety issue as well as common courtesy. ... It's not about being independent or even passing wind as you so blatantly put it ... It's about caring. Sharing with family and friends where your at and so forth is not a crime, we are leaving Florida tommorow afternoon, mom and dad and my brother got a call today. They will get one before we hit the road, they will get one if we decide to stop for the night as our time schedule would be delayed... And when we get into Ohio my aunt down here will get a call telling her we are home... It's called caring about one another, when your tight knit like us... We just feel it necessary. Just an opinion....
lisamarie1265
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 12:54 AM
Quoting bertie4:

I think it's nice to know they will be gone. I tell my Mom and in laws when we go anywhere for more than a day. My adult kids tell me, not details, just they will be gone. Lots of time they are excited to be going and just talking about it in conversation. It's nice to have someone keep an eye on the house, pick up mail etc.




Absolutely agree with you ...
mariC67
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 1:18 PM


Quoting CoeyG:


Quoting mariC67:


Quoting CoeyG:


Quoting DixieL:

Common courtesy. If my son disappeared without telling me I would be scard to death. He always tells me where he is going and about when he will be back

In this day and age it is a bit difficult for an adult to "disappear" unless someone removes them from the face of the earth.  There are cellphones, Ipohnes, Ipads all kinds of communication devices I've heard tell that you can access the internet on your laptop in your car now.  When Shannon and I came cross country from Caliofnria almost 5 years ago we got a flat tire, pulled over, pulled out the cell phone and dialed AAA, within a half hour I was heaed to the nearest Firestone place to get a free tire because they were still under warantee.  Shannon's dad knew we were heading this way so that evening Shannon called to let him know that we'd probably be a day later than we had planned because of it.  There was no reason to contact anyone else regarding the flat tire, not much anyone else could do about it.  Yes people knew we were moving here but that is because we were moving not just goihg out of town.  Like I said, I have people who love me, but they don't need to know every time I fart.

You are quite wrong there as far as it being difficult to disappear..modern technology just makes it easier to stay in touch with those that want to be connected. I live in a rural area and there are many places around me where there are no cell phone signals, hell I get not even 3 miles out of town and I lose my signal, if I break down I'l be walking and many times I've been on stretches of road where there is nothing at all and many times after dark I've seen hogs, panthers, black bears, coyotes or wild dogs and gators, either on the road or on the shoulder. You could sit there for hours before some one came along and then god knows who that could be. Not to long ago they pulled a car out of a canal not far from here that had the remains of a woman still inside it. She had been missing for over 2 years. Those canals have dark water in them and you cant see more than a foot below the surface. Things can and do happen unfortunately, I know it probably wouldnt have saved the womans life but if someone had known where she was going the family could have put things to rest sooner.

Okay so you sit in your car for hours waiting for help.  This is why you keep your car prepared for such events like I do.  I have a suitcase in my car at all times that has a first aid kit, blanket, even a change of clothes.  It has all kinds of things in it for my needs. including two O2 tanks and a several means of opening them and I also carry severl of those means in the glove box and on my person at all times.  I'm on O2 24/7/365 and yet I don't feel the need to tell anyone that I'm going out of town when I do...if "God forbid" happens that would probably mean that "God" had already planned it.  

Try sitting in your car in 98 degree heat with 98% humidity - you'll fry and those critters I mentioned are not just out at night, have you ever seen the damage a hog can do?. And by giving some one your itinerary, it very well could save your life whether or not god planned it. Living in a rural area this is just part of common sense, when you go hiking or camping you need to let someone know where you are going and when you'll be home so that if you dont return they know where to send a search party. Like I said 3 miles out of town we are off the grid so its not any different that going on a hiking trip. My travel kit that I keep in the car is like yours (minus the O2) but also includes water and food as well as a knife and a baseball bat, I even have some fishing line and hooks.

caro100
by Carol on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:01 PM

It is none of your business, however having said that, I always let someone know if I'm going on a trip.  There are serial killers out there and you just never know.  just makes good sense to let someone know, maybe just not your parents.

CoeyG
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 6:39 PM


Quoting lisamarie1265:

Quoting CoeyG:




You can prep your car all you want all of our vehicles have the necessary items in them, i.e. first aid kits, car safety kits, blankets, tools to cut the seat belt, smash a window ect.... All of that cannot protect you from a car jacker, or an accident that could render you unconscious..ect telling family and friends where your going to be is a safety issue as well as common courtesy. ... It's not about being independent or even passing wind as you so blatantly put it ... It's about caring. Sharing with family and friends where your at and so forth is not a crime, we are leaving Florida tommorow afternoon, mom and dad and my brother got a call today. They will get one before we hit the road, they will get one if we decide to stop for the night as our time schedule would be delayed... And when we get into Ohio my aunt down here will get a call telling her we are home... It's called caring about one another, when your tight knit like us... We just feel it necessary. Just an opinion....

How is telling family members you're going out of town going to protect you from a car jacker?  

Moms_Angels1960
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 6:44 PM

While I would like to say Common courtesy It is none of our business where they are going. I would like to be informed I know that isn't going to happen anytime. My dd sometimes tells me but not very often.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN