Common courtesy or none of your business? Update question.....
Just a question.....
If your married adult child goes out of town/state for the weekend, is it common courtesy to let you (as his/her parent)? Or is it none of your business?
Let me rephrase: Is it common courtesy or none of your business, to let you know that they are going out of town. Not what they're doing, just to inform you they're going.
With lastest technolgy of cell phones and things, does anyone take into consideration that cell phones die, and/or lose signal? Does this play into the safety/ emergency issue?
Angels Lending A Helping Hand
In my family we tell each other if we were leaving town... It has always been that way so I don't really question it. Seems like common sense to let them know I was going out of town in case something happened.
If I am planning a trip out of town I would mention it to my family because I talk to them a 1-2 times per week for routine conversation. My parents are retired and travel often on short notice. My dad will always call or text me saying "just wanted to let you know we are going to be in XXX for the weekend". In my family it is just common courtesy and has always been done. When we leave someone's house for a long drive we also CALL or text to say we got home okay. My dad always did this with his parents and we got in a bad (hospitalization required)accident on the way home. My grandparents KNEW something was wrong when we didn't call and they couldn't reach us so they were able to help right away.
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting shadenn766:
lol...it has nothing to do with being nosey...there are family members that tell vacation plans to one another...not about prying or being nosey...its just family communicating with each other... its not mandatory, but a courtesy, they do it because they want to...not because they have to
maybe you dont have people that love you, and/or check in on you from time to time...but a lot of us do...lol...
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting shadenn766:
common courtesy...absolutely nothing wrong with checking in/checking on family
Why would you be so nosey? If the adult offspring is married and not living at home the only one(s) needing to know where that person is would be their spouse and their children. That would be common courtesey. But if it's an adult living on their own then they are entitled to their personal life without having to inform their parents...it's not like this adult offspring needs parental permission to go out of town.
I don't even live in the same state as most of my family, I'm not going to be calling them and telling them everytime I go out of town...they wouldn't care LOL. And yes dear heart I do have people who love me but they don't have to khow about every time I fart.
Well hopefully you have friends that you are close to if not your family,
It really is about how close you are to your family and how often you talk. I talk to my family at least once a week (sometimes more)..... they basically KNOW what is going on with my life. In addition to leaving town, I tell them when we make a big change to the house, when the kids have a milestone (braces, license, grades), if something significant happens a work (big project, promo, layoff), if we have a non-routine doctor appointment and really any other good or bad news. Heck... I even tell them how my pets and garden are doing. And I know all of that about them too.... We are FRIENDS who just happen to be related.
Quoting FindersKeepers:
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting shadenn766:
lol...it has nothing to do with being nosey...there are family members that tell vacation plans to one another...not about prying or being nosey...its just family communicating with each other... its not mandatory, but a courtesy, they do it because they want to...not because they have to
maybe you dont have people that love you, and/or check in on you from time to time...but a lot of us do...lol...
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting shadenn766:
common courtesy...absolutely nothing wrong with checking in/checking on family
Why would you be so nosey? If the adult offspring is married and not living at home the only one(s) needing to know where that person is would be their spouse and their children. That would be common courtesey. But if it's an adult living on their own then they are entitled to their personal life without having to inform their parents...it's not like this adult offspring needs parental permission to go out of town.
I don't even live in the same state as most of my family, I'm not going to be calling them and telling them everytime I go out of town...they wouldn't care LOL. And yes dear heart I do have people who love me but they don't have to khow about every time I fart.
Well hopefully you have friends that you are close to if not your family,
It really is about how close you are to your family and how often you talk. I talk to my family at least once a week (sometimes more)..... they basically KNOW what is going on with my life. In addition to leaving town, I tell them when we make a big change to the house, when the kids have a milestone (braces, license, grades), if something significant happens a work (big project, promo, layoff), if we have a non-routine doctor appointment and really any other good or bad news. Heck... I even tell them how my pets and garden are doing. And I know all of that about them too.... We are FRIENDS who just happen to be related.
I am very "close" to certain family members but they don't live close. I have friends that I've had my entire life but they don't live close. I don't feel the need to tell everyone I love that I'm going out of town. My daughter lives in Texas I live in Pennsylvania there is no point in her telling me she is going out of town when she does. She might tell me about her trip when she gets back but there is no reason for me to know she is going out of town.
Absolutely common courtesy or at least common sense.
We let our children know when we will be away and they always let us know as well. My parents who live several states away still call to let us know if they are going to be away, even for just a few days.
It's actually important to always let someone know if you are going to be away. It's actually recommend by Safety Professionals (Police, Fire, etc) that you notify someone, usually family when you are going to be away.
What if there is an emergency? What if you or they were flying and there was a crash? Who would even know you were missing? It's not even remotely about being nosey, it's about caring and consideration and it's even about being safe.
Why would you assume that just because family members don't update each other on their schedules they don't love each other? What an odd thing to say. I have plenty of people who love me, but I don't feel they need to know what I'm doing all the time. Families communicate in a variety of different ways, and just because some don't exchange itineraries that doesn't mean they don't love each other. And to insinuate that, because schedules aren't given to family members all the time, someone people "don't have people that love you..." is very judgemental.
Quoting shadenn766:lol...it has nothing to do with being nosey...there are family members that tell vacation plans to one another...not about prying or being nosey...its just family communicating with each other... its not mandatory, but a courtesy, they do it because they want to...not because they have to
maybe you dont have people that love you, and/or check in on you from time to time...but a lot of us do...lol...
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting shadenn766:
common courtesy...absolutely nothing wrong with checking in/checking on family
Why would you be so nosey? If the adult offspring is married and not living at home the only one(s) needing to know where that person is would be their spouse and their children. That would be common courtesey. But if it's an adult living on their own then they are entitled to their personal life without having to inform their parents...it's not like this adult offspring needs parental permission to go out of town.
Quoting KittyGram:My daughter and I have enough respect for each other that we do let each other know when we're going out of town. What if the one at home had to reach the other in the event of an emergency? Yeah, I think it's common courtesy. Actually, more like common sense to let at least SOMEONE know that you're going out of town.
Cellphones. My daughter has one, I have one. Wherever we go it's with us, if there is an emergency we know about it...Just like when she called about her hip. Hell she was being wheeled into the OR and we were talking about her getting surgery LOL Not much I could have done about her problem when it happened...She's in Texas I'm in Pennsylvania...I don't think I could have gotten there soon enough considering I'd have to figure out how to have enough portable O2, plus get the dogs ready for the trip, By the time I would have gotten there gangrene would have set in and she would have lost her leg LOL
Quoting CoeyG:
Quoting KittyGram:
My daughter and I have enough respect for each other that we do let each other know when we're going out of town. What if the one at home had to reach the other in the event of an emergency? Yeah, I think it's common courtesy. Actually, more like common sense to let at least SOMEONE know that you're going out of town.
Cellphones. My daughter has one, I have one. Wherever we go it's with us, if there is an emergency we know about it...Just like when she called about her hip. Hell she was being wheeled into the OR and we were talking about her getting surgery LOL Not much I could have done about her problem when it happened...She's in Texas I'm in Pennsylvania...I don't think I could have gotten there soon enough considering I'd have to figure out how to have enough portable O2, plus get the dogs ready for the trip, By the time I would have gotten there gangrene would have set in and she would have lost her leg LOL
It's still advised by safety professionals, as someone else posted, to let someone know where you're staying, and even the route you're taking (if driving), in case something happens during your drive.
Do what you want, but as for me, I'd rather be safe than sorry.
??QOTD?? 5/21/13
- busygramma4
on Jun. 11, 2012 at 12:34 PM