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Moms with Adult Kids Moms with Adult Kids

Do Your Adult Kids help you with anything?

Posted by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 1:27 PM
  • 24 Replies

My husband has asked my DS to do things for us that we can no longer do for ourselves - like cut down a dead tree.  Even if you ask for something simple to be done, he has to "think on it" and won't commit to anything.  He is 48 years old and would think he would want to help.  The last few years he has changed so much.  He started doing odd jobs like cutting neighbor's grass, etc., when he was about 12.  Now he doesn't work, but stays home to be "Mr. Mom" to his youngest son, who is 4 years old.  He lets his GF work and "bring home the bacon" when he could earn a lot more than she does.  I don't get it.

by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 1:27 PM
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Replies (1-10):
suzeebloch
by Ronna on Sep. 3, 2012 at 1:31 PM

I don't need my "adult kids" help - yet. 

But on the flip side, I'm an adult child, too, at age 53, and live alone.  My brother, who just turned 50, lives at home with my parents, ages 80 and 79.  He is always "helping" them with things.  I, too, help whenever asked!  I am blessed to have wonderfully supportive parents and as the adult children, We never think twice about helping them when asked or when we know it's needed without asking! 

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by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 1:33 PM

While my kids don't live home or too close,
Youngest is the closest being about an hour an a half away,
If I asked him to do something he would.
Oldest is in another state.
However if I needed him to do something & he was in town I feel sure he would help :)



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atlmom2
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 1:51 PM
We are 50 so we do not need them to. Our girls probably won't. Maybe our son in laws will someday. Heck, my mom and stepdad used to visit us and do all kinds of jobs for us. They were late 60s and early 80s, lol.
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mac1940
by Mary Ann on Sep. 3, 2012 at 4:11 PM

My kids, though they don't live in the same town, have always been very helpful.  My daughter and her family live about six hours away and usually try to come over once a month.  She and her hubby always are hlping to do things while they are here - in fact instruct us to keep a list of things we would like done.  My oldest son lives in Virginia, too far from Washington stateto do much doing, but always want to hire someone to come do it for us.  I am blessed.

darmomusaf
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 4:37 PM

My kids try to help as much as possible when they are around. DS helped moved some things today before he left to head back to Deleware. DD is living with us this semester and she usually cooks dinner when she gets home before me, so I, too, am blessed

homeskoolmama
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 4:57 PM
1 mom liked this

middle age crisis? I don't know. I am 46 and when I go to my parents house I work myself silly. They can't do everything anymore so I do all I can. My dh will take a day off and go do my moms honey do list. My oldest son lives less than a mile from my parents, he cuts their grass every week. Which he should, she gives him free child care!

CoeyG
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 5:26 PM

He is 48 years old and has been working since he was twelve and you say you don't get why he would want to stay home and be with his child?  What is it that you don't get?  There is nothing wrong with a man staying home for the sake of his children.  So what if his girlfriend makes less than he does, if they are a happy family that is all that counts.  As for his not helping your husband how about hiring a 12 year old boy to do the work?  Your son has the right to not have to work for you and his father.  

enafaye
by Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 6:44 PM

My adult kids are all very busy. They have to travel to visit, and the time they do give us, we usually use in different ways.  My one son, does come to help us ie; clean out the attic or tool shed.  We rarely ask for much help.

jurnee14
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 7:06 PM

My older daughter and her family live just down the street from us,so we help each other out all the time, usually with babysitting. My mom is just a few blocks away and I help her with things, mostly stuff like dealing with her insurance, paperwork and things of that nature. When she had her house my and my one brother would do her yard work, hang christmas lights etc. 

amylulu1
by Amy on Sep. 3, 2012 at 7:11 PM
I don't think a 12 year old kia should be trying to cut down a tree...with that said, I think I, too, would be disappointed if my kids acted put out or didnt want to help me. Do you have any other family that may be able to help you?
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