I'm a mom with two adult sons. Twenty and twenty two. My twenty two year old has given me problems since he was twelve. First it was telling me he hated me to hitting me back and now calling me a f*(*&n bitch. I was a single mom for a while until I met my husband. He's been their CYO coach, mentor and father. He's been great and very patient. I've tried to get him help for his anger but he always ends up stopping his sessions. I always felt if he could hit me he would hit anyone he dated. One of the last times he pushed me I made him leave, called the police and they escorted him out of my house. He moved in with his girlfriend and parents until that night came. He hit her. Of course when her father found out he kicked him out. He lived there for about a year. When he was kicked out he asked if he could come back and stated he was tired of being the way he was and needed help. My husband, son and I made the choice together. We decided to let him come back home.
Of course once home we were all walking on egg shells wondering when his next episode would occur. We called them episodes because they happened every year. Well we lasted almost a year and the latest episode happened again, a month ago. He went on to call me crippled, bitch, sorry excuse for a mother and so on. I told him to leave and told him he would never be welcomed here again. I told him as far as I was concerned I only had one son and only he was welcomed. The sad thing about this is that I miss my son and still want to be part of his life. I have never been involved with any man who physically or mentally abused me. The sad thing is I have a son who does this. I don't know anymore how to help him. We haven't talked at all. I cry eveyday and this week I found myself not being able to get out of bed, therefore I have missed work for three days. I don't want to be like this, and my husband doesn't understand my depression. Things I should laugh about make me cry. As soon as my alarm rings in the morning I get anxiety thinking I have to get up. I feel when people look at me they know I'm depressed and I have a son he treats me the way he does. I feel I cannot ever trust him but yet can't imagine not having both my sons in my life.