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The children we have problems with

Posted by on Sep. 30, 2012 at 7:54 PM
  • 7 Replies

I was wondering this. I have a son that gives me issues. He was hard to raise and is still very hard to be around. 

He has emotional/mental problems. I have taken him to many doctors and he has been on medications...this has been going on since he was 13. I started noticing problems when he was 3. 

There are many women in this group who have children that give them the same type of grief that my son does. So my question is, do your children also have emotional issues/mental issues? Have they been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, depression, things like that? 

I feel sorry for my son because I know it is hard for him to handle his emotions. Even if I can't be around him much. I was just wondering about yours.

by on Sep. 30, 2012 at 7:54 PM
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Replies (1-7):
DysphoniaBec
by on Sep. 30, 2012 at 11:38 PM

Yes.  My son is 48 and is hard to be around, too.  He was ADHD before they called it that.  He was put on Ritalin when he was 4.  I had all sisters and just thought he was all boy.  When he was finally diagnosed with a learning disability, I read everything I could get my hands on and joined and became involved in the local support group.  Though there were others with hyperactive children, no one had the problems I did with my son.  I tried to do everything I could to get him help, but things just got continuously worse.  He didn't get in an LD class until he was in fourth grade.  He was expelled from a self-contained LD class in fifth grade before Halloween.  Things went down hill from there.  He has always resented being labelled AND put on medication that doped him up (his words).  The medication only slowed him down some.  He was still VERY hyper   .Also, he talked constantly.  My ears got/get tired from all his talking.  He is very persuasive and could sell snow to an Eskimo and make them think they got a good deal!  lol 

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by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 12:09 AM

My sons are very different, yes,
However while one has given us more *challenges* then the other ..
It was more about choices then anything else.

Hugs to you hon :)

Why123
by Nancy on Oct. 1, 2012 at 9:55 AM

I think that all children are difficult at one time or another.  If we look back seriously we will see that we were too.  Mine get along reasonablely well with each other as long as they don't live too close together.

LadySaphira
by Lisa on Oct. 1, 2012 at 10:00 AM

The only one who has given me any issues os Roo and his is moslty not listening/arguing. He has been diagnosed with severe ADHD, PDD-NOS, mild anxiety, SPD, and moderate MR

amylulu1
by Amy on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:11 PM
1 mom liked this

 My youngest son (J) is learning disabled as well as ADHD.  He still cannot read very well and he is a sophomore in HS and will turn 18 next month.  I sent him to his father's last year due to the problems he has given me- and that was only because he was too big to discipline anymore!!  I have had continual problems from him since he was in daycare.  He was kicked out of 2 daycares, he was held back in Kindergarten and 1st grade (he was finally diagnosed after that), and was expelled from school in the 5th grade.  He had to go to another school in a class for kids with LD and behavioral issues.  Honestly, the weird thing is that he was very well behaved at home (until he got older and I was working 2 jobs)!!!  These issues would only manifest at school.  They got slightly better once he was diagnosed and on his medication, however, the acting out was still there.  I honestly think that his disabilities weren't being addressed properly, therefore, he couldn't follow along in class and either got bored or frustrated and would act out inappropriately.  By inappropriate, I mean talking out loud, banging on the desk, getting out of his chair, interrupting other students and as he got older, being argumentative with the teachers.  He was extra sensitive to how they treated him.  If they spoke to him firmly yet gently (??) he was fine, but if they raised their voice or were at all condescending, it was chaos.  He would get up and leave the class. Again, it was hard because he is such a dear, sweet kid.  The kind of kid that takes up for younger kids if they're being bullied.  The kind of kid who is so quick to help when you ask for it and soaking up hugs and kisses.   He volunteered at a place called Spirit Horse and would clean stalls and feed horses, etc.  It was just so hard to consolidate this sweetness with him ALWAYS getting in trouble.  After dealing with this for 10 years (I actually lost a very good paying job because I had to leave and go to his school so much), I finally asked his father to take him in and start being a role model to him.  I was working 2 jobs and he had far too much freedom.  He was hanging with the wrong kids, breaking curfew, fighting, stealing and ended up in the hospital twice for stitches from breaking windows.  I HAD to have both jobs to make ends meet and there was no way for me to be there monitoring him constantly.  He was 16 so too old for daycare.  I miss him terribly and we talk quite often on the phone.  His father is married with children and his stepmom treats him just like the other kids.  His father is well known in his community and able to keep close tabs on him.  J is 6'5" and his dad is 7'1", so he tends to listen to him much better, as well.  My son has gotten much better now that his father is involved and I sincerely wonder if that was also part of the problem.  I did the best I could.  I know that sometimes my best wasn't good enough, but I can actually hold my head high and know that I did my best.   Here is something that he posted on facebook last week...it made me cry!!

The one person i can trust and talk to is MY MOM..she been there if me my hole life the good times and bad.i just want to say I LOVE U...ikno we been through things but we got past them,i never really got to say bye.but i guess you can't miss that person in till there too far away...it wasn't till I got on the train that I knew I wouldn't be able to see you for a long time..but it was too late to tell u..just want u to know that i love and adore you ...i miss my mom

amylulu1
by Amy on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:14 PM

 And sorry for writing a book.  Thank you for letting me get that out, as well. 

Bmat
by Barb on Oct. 2, 2012 at 6:24 AM

I can't say about all children, but I know that mine went back and forth on who was harder to raise and get along with. Right now they are about equal in difficulty. :)

Quoting Why123:

I think that all children are difficult at one time or another.  If we look back seriously we will see that we were too.  Mine get along reasonablely well with each other as long as they don't live too close together.


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