Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Moms with Adult Kids Moms with Adult Kids

So, over the holiday, our girl was home for three weeks or more. She finally seemed more herself, almost back to normal. Her brain got back and being ADHD she began arguing a great deal about anything and everything which is the her we know. We were happy though it's frustrating too. At least we know her as a capable fighter instead of a person who gives up, and isn't capable at all.

I think she had been through so much with illness and world view changes and giving up certain goals and dreams that it just took time to get better. I also think being home helped her regulate her habits, behaviors and take her meds, though there were still days or parts of days she forgot and I didn't check. Honestly, I don't think anyone should have to check.

Another change that was good was that all of a sudden she told me she could tell she felt better, was more functional and did better when she took her meds. She has often hated taking them. She has even thrown up because she worked herself up over it before. I told her, if you had a heart disease you'd take meds for that and not fuss about it, why not this? She has often had a hard time, telling if the meds were helping or not. She has a hard time telling how things make her feel and with memory sometimes. So I was happy to see her finally come around on this.

She began the semester happy to get back to her apartment and to college. Yay! Second day of classes she didn't make it because her phone charger died and therefore her phone alarm didn't go off. I was upset about it but told her not to let this be a marker about how her semester would go. I do wonder why chargers of any kind "die" on her so often. It's really strange. The other three of us don't have those problems. It has to be related to ADHD and not being careful with things.

So the third day was a snow day.

I took her back to her apartment yesterday. She played a role playing game with her friends until 3 a.m. Sunday night / Monday morning. Today she "didn't feel right" and felt like "she needed to come home for a few hours." So we did that, even ate out because she thought that would help. I take her back to her apartment this evening and she breaks down and says, she needs to come home and have me drive her to class in the morning. *sigh*

I've checked her pill box. She's taken them.

She claims nothing has happened or upset her.

She claims she hasn't been doing any non prescription drugs or alcohol but this is scary and disheartening.

Hopefully she catches up on her sleep tonight and is all better the rest of the week. I'm so tired of her clinging to me and needing something else we can't figure out at all.

Tomorrow is a new day and now, an earlier day. I hope it's sunshine for her and for me!

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 10:56 PM
Replies (11-20):
Bleacheddecay
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:14 PM

She wouldn't go for that. I think if I weren't around she might end up in something like that during one of her low periods court ordered though. In her good times she is very high functioning. You just never know.


Quoting homeskoolmama:

Would a group home be an option for her, they have freedom but also someone to 'remind' them of medicines and kind of help keep them in line. Would she go for that if one is available? It would help your stress level too.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She is 22. She moved out three years ago but still spends a lot of time at home. She goes to counseling on a regular basis. I've made that a requirement for her mental health.

She has been in emotional "crisis" for over a year now. It's exhausting and if I don't answer the call every single time, she might harm herself. She is not okay just the way she is. She is not always functional and it's always a scary thing if she will be for a particular day / task / semester or not. Since last fall, she hasn't been. I thought, maybe she had come out of it.

Too early to tell today if she will be able to cope or not.

I do believe no matter what your issues or challenges are, you have to figure out how to cope. If only she would.




Bleacheddecay
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:15 PM
1 mom liked this

Thanks. She is having a better day today. *crosses fingers*


Quoting nana9106:

 hopefully things will level out. Maybe she needs different meds? I will be praying for her....and you

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She is 22. She moved out three years ago but still spends a lot of time at home. She goes to counseling on a regular basis. I've made that a requirement for her mental health.

She has been in emotional "crisis" for over a year now. It's exhausting and if I don't answer the call every single time, she might harm herself. She is not okay just the way she is. She is not always functional and it's always a scary thing if she will be for a particular day / task / semester or not. Since last fall, she hasn't been. I thought, maybe she had come out of it.

Too early to tell today if she will be able to cope or not.

I do believe no matter what your issues or challenges are, you have to figure out how to cope. If only she would.

 



nana9106
by Darlene on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:16 PM
1 mom liked this

 Well, one day at a time they say...easier said than done, i know.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

Thanks. She is having a better day today. *crosses fingers*

 

Quoting nana9106:

 hopefully things will level out. Maybe she needs different meds? I will be praying for her....and you

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She is 22. She moved out three years ago but still spends a lot of time at home. She goes to counseling on a regular basis. I've made that a requirement for her mental health.

She has been in emotional "crisis" for over a year now. It's exhausting and if I don't answer the call every single time, she might harm herself. She is not okay just the way she is. She is not always functional and it's always a scary thing if she will be for a particular day / task / semester or not. Since last fall, she hasn't been. I thought, maybe she had come out of it.

Too early to tell today if she will be able to cope or not.

I do believe no matter what your issues or challenges are, you have to figure out how to cope. If only she would.

 

 

 

 

Bleacheddecay
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:20 PM

Thanks everyone. She is having a better day today. I feel like making her a check list for when she is having a bad day.

Did you?

1.) Take your meds?

2.) Eat three balanced meals and two snacks?

3.) Get enough sleep?

4.) Work out?

And so on . . . but she claims check lists don't work for her.

After I got up earlier than I would have otherwise had too (and I'm sick right now) I got her to school, got the oil changed in my car, came home and found that despite my telling her to take everything she'd need if she stayed and felt good at college, she'd left her meds. *sigh*

So that was yet another trip to her apartment I hadn't planned and then on to work. Just rying to make it through the day.

LadySaphira
by Lisa on Jan. 22, 2013 at 5:26 PM

It sounds like she has a lot more than ADHD going on to me. I have it and although I realize no two people are the same, talking back and her other actions do not soudn like ADHD to me. When has she been evaluated last? She could have other issues that have not been found yet or she could just be emotionaly immature.

Bleacheddecay
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 8:16 PM

She also has PTSD, anxiety and depression. She was last evaluated four years ago. She sees her doctors and therapist often.

Quoting LadySaphira:

It sounds like she has a lot more than ADHD going on to me. I have it and although I realize no two people are the same, talking back and her other actions do not soudn like ADHD to me. When has she been evaluated last? She could have other issues that have not been found yet or she could just be emotionaly immature.



LadySaphira
by Lisa on Jan. 22, 2013 at 8:19 PM
1 mom liked this

That explains things a bit more...I hope she  finds her way soon and that you can coninue to be strong for her untill then.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She also has PTSD, anxiety and depression. She was last evaluated four years ago. She sees her doctors and therapist often.

Quoting LadySaphira:

It sounds like she has a lot more than ADHD going on to me. I have it and although I realize no two people are the same, talking back and her other actions do not soudn like ADHD to me. When has she been evaluated last? She could have other issues that have not been found yet or she could just be emotionaly immature.




Click on my siggy to help find a cure for cancer!

Maddie24
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:16 PM
2 moms liked this

 I can only imagine how hard this must be.  I am so sorry. 

homeskoolmama
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 9:08 AM

Very stressful I'm sure. I have a friend who's grandson is like that. Finally at 21 she had to let him go and do his own thing. She prays a lot. So far so good.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She wouldn't go for that. I think if I weren't around she might end up in something like that during one of her low periods court ordered though. In her good times she is very high functioning. You just never know.


Quoting homeskoolmama:

Would a group home be an option for her, they have freedom but also someone to 'remind' them of medicines and kind of help keep them in line. Would she go for that if one is available? It would help your stress level too.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She is 22. She moved out three years ago but still spends a lot of time at home. She goes to counseling on a regular basis. I've made that a requirement for her mental health.

She has been in emotional "crisis" for over a year now. It's exhausting and if I don't answer the call every single time, she might harm herself. She is not okay just the way she is. She is not always functional and it's always a scary thing if she will be for a particular day / task / semester or not. Since last fall, she hasn't been. I thought, maybe she had come out of it.

Too early to tell today if she will be able to cope or not.

I do believe no matter what your issues or challenges are, you have to figure out how to cope. If only she would.





Bleacheddecay
by Gold Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 12:08 PM

My girl would not be able to cope. I'm the one person she can count on in life, including herself.


Quoting homeskoolmama:

Very stressful I'm sure. I have a friend who's grandson is like that. Finally at 21 she had to let him go and do his own thing. She prays a lot. So far so good.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She wouldn't go for that. I think if I weren't around she might end up in something like that during one of her low periods court ordered though. In her good times she is very high functioning. You just never know.


Quoting homeskoolmama:

Would a group home be an option for her, they have freedom but also someone to 'remind' them of medicines and kind of help keep them in line. Would she go for that if one is available? It would help your stress level too.

Quoting Bleacheddecay:

She is 22. She moved out three years ago but still spends a lot of time at home. She goes to counseling on a regular basis. I've made that a requirement for her mental health.

She has been in emotional "crisis" for over a year now. It's exhausting and if I don't answer the call every single time, she might harm herself. She is not okay just the way she is. She is not always functional and it's always a scary thing if she will be for a particular day / task / semester or not. Since last fall, she hasn't been. I thought, maybe she had come out of it.

Too early to tell today if she will be able to cope or not.

I do believe no matter what your issues or challenges are, you have to figure out how to cope. If only she would.







Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN