Your post regarding your dilemma has gotten snowballed with replies ... and they seem overwhelmingly to say choose your daughter over this man. If you read through all the replies, you will find tucked and hidden in some of those replies the feelings expressed by young women who are not yet "Moms With Adult Kids" - yet some of these young women have mothers who chose a man over them ... and that hurts deeply.
I think you know in your heart what your decision must be - but I can appreciate what a tough decision this will be for you to follow through on. I am sure most of the ladies here at MWAK will agree with me in stating we are here to support you. I sincerely hope you will stand by what I feel you know down deep is the RIGHT decision ... and I just wanted to say that I am here to share in that journey, if you choose it.
I wish you the best in your decision.