What has been your biggest challenge in parenting adult children?
I have had no problems with my adult children - we got those out of the way when they were teens.
Basic Training. LOL. Just being infantry & having that long training of 4 months. Someone controlling when you can talk to them ( which was very little ), etc. Just had to get through that part & now he is at his new command/First Duty Station. It all happened right out after graduation & only about 6 weeks after he turned 18. So it was just easing into it LOL.
Watching them hurt, or make mistakes. It's hard to stay out of their business but it gets easier over time - mostly because they are learning from the mistakes they've made just as I'm getting more comfortable with staying out of their business. lol.
As far as hurting - my 23 year old son who moved 1800 miles away when he was 18 (for college) was diagnosed with a brain tumor when he was 19 and that really sucks. I allow myself to wear my Mom hat a lot for him when it comes to that stupid tumor but of course this is totally different than a self-imposed hurt!
My only, 22 years old, is a really good kid, and the only problem is to encourage her to knuckle down and finish a degree so she can get a career and be financially independent.
My 22 year old can't be alone and goes from woman to woman in a blink of an eye.
Good question. At one point it was watching one get serious with what would have been a terrible choice. Generally speaking, it's keeping quiet when you'd like to advise them or listening to them try & give you advice.
Not giving advice unless asked for.
I guess the biggest challenge is watching your kids get their heart broken or go through trials. Nothing we can do anymore (but pray).
Financial independence was a challenge with both of them. My oldest had my DGD when she was 18, so I supported them for 9 years - now she has graduated from college, employed, self supporting and a wonderful mother - but it took a lot of time. We had some really great times, but we had some hard times as well. Another adult child did not 'know what she wanted to do with her life'. I had to sit her down and tell her she had to 'do' something to support herself. It was just some very hard roads to get them to adulthood. I don't doubt that my over protective parenting and assuming their consequences contributed to their 'delayed' adulthood. Thankfully they are happy and living their own lives. I sure did not realize how many challenges I would face with adult children.
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