UPDATE: Ooooo...I need to vent. (sorry if this gets long)
UPDATE: Ok we went today and spoke with her guidance councilor. (We love her she was a big help). We explained what was bothering DD and got it all straightened out.
* the moving out thing....The teacher is talking about the future like, "When you decide you don't want to live with your mom and dad anymore you will need to know all this stuff." The way DD took what she said was more of 'Right now you need to move out'.
* The failing comment was because DD hasn't been doing her homework. I can't get it out for her if she doesn't tell me she has it.
* Same with the reading. She saw the assignment as 'you must read a book' instead of 'as long as you read 30 minutes we don't care what you read.' (We'll see how that goes when the teacher actually see what she likes to read about online. Wrestling anyone?)
Also part of the problem that DD could tell me today infront of her Councilor but couldn't say on Friday, was the look the teacher was giving her is part of what made her feel uncomfortable. We think that is because she realized she got caught hoodwinking people.
It was also explained that the particular teacher is a kind of in your face person who cares about her students and it may just be that DD isn't seeing that she has her best interests at heart. I'm (and DD) willing to let it go for the time being and DD has been told to not be such a stranger in the office if she doesn't understand something. That's what the councilor is there for. Also we've come up with a way to get the homework thing straightened around. Back to the I sign the log and the aide signs the log to show that we both checked the homework folder. Hopefully this will straighten things out and we won't have another meltdown for the rest of the year.
Quick Back ground.... I have three kids aged 24, 20 and 19. The two younger kids are both girls with learning disabilities and the 20 year old is in a wheelchair due to Cerebral Palsy. Both girls have IEPs and are finishing up on high school right now. This vent has to do with the 20 year old.
DD#1 is a really smart kid who was painfully shy when she was younger. She took quite awhile to warm up to people and even though she has since found her voice, she still can get upset when someone criticizes her and she isn't allowed to say something about it. Because of her shyness when she was tested early on the scores came out lower than they should have. Because we were military at the time and moved around it was hard for her to warm up enough to shine. That is, until we got to Louisiana. We moved there towards the end of her Senior year. According to her last school she was to graduate with a Special Ed diploma. If you've never had to deal with Special Ed, let me tell you it's not worth the paper it's written on. All through the Junior High and High School DD#1 said that she wanted to go to college and study in the medical field. Kind of hard for her since her diagnosis is Spastic Quadriplegia, she can move but only really has the use of her left hand. Anyway, we were, at that time, okay with the Special Ed diploma because of her previous test scores.
Well during her Senior year we had to move again for dad's work and moved down to Louisiana. We went to register her in the new school and when they were trying to place her in classes so she could finish the year, they discovered that she hadn't been retested since elementary school. They decided to retest and when they did it was discovered that DD#1 is smarter than previously thought and felt that she could get a regular diploma on her own. They told us (something the previous school hadn't bothered to mention) that if She graduated with the Special Ed diploma, that IF she chose to go on to higher learning that she would have to get her GED in order to go to college. We also found out that if she decided to stay in school and start over, she could get a regular diploma before her 22nd birthday. It was her choice though. She decided to do it, as did her sister who also has learning disabilities.
She was doing great at her last school but we had to move again for dad's work and her new school has been great as well and she is still on track to graduate next year.
Now here comes the vent. (Thank you if you have made it this far)
I am fed up with one of her teachers. Thanks to an aide that DD#1 had in her first high school, DD#1 has a hard time trusting people. The woman was beyond annoying and because of what she did (We try not to talk about it anymore since it just upsets her) DD#1 has a hard time trusting people not from our family who try and tell her how to run her life.
*This new teacher has gone so far as to tell DD#1 that she should move out of her loving home and into an assisted living facility/ nursing home.
*She has told her that she needs to learn how to use public transit. (We live in an area that doesn't have a bus system)
*She has told her that she can't do anything for herself and that we baby her. (Duh, Genius, she can only use one arm and can't sit up on her own, but we don't baby her.) This woman has just overstepped her boundaries beyond belief.
*When DD#1 took her English Graduation exam (she has accommodations for tests that include being read to due to eye sight tracking issues) this woman stuck her in the center of the room and read to her from across the room (no problem). When we got the test results back the teacher tried to take all the credit for DD#1's hard work. (test was on computer so DD#1 was able to make her own answers and she only missed by 15 points from passing). The sysem here is different then previous schools and she has been about to do something called Bridge Projects to pass that section. She only had to take the one section.
*She has told other students in front of DD#1 that she has failed my daughter before and if she could fail her, she could fail them. (Hilairious since DD#1 is a straight A honor student) Now the reason she 'failed' DD#1 is because DD#1 came in at the end of the year and due to coming from another state, hadn't been in her class all year and therefore wasn't able to pass the end of year exam due to differing curricula between the schools.
Today DD#1 came home from school and was quite upset when she got off the bus. This teacher (Who DD#1 doesn't even have any longer thanks to passing the exit exam) had started up again. Telling DD#1 again that she's being babied by us. (No we take care of her but she is far from babied) That she needs to learn about the bus and that she (the teacher) can still fail her. She also got on her about reading (DD#1 doesn't even have this teacher for reading and I talked to that teacher today and found out that she is very very happy with DD#1's progress and that she is starting to exceed her IEP goals for reading)
DD#1 is absolutely anal about her grades. We've always been happy with whatever she could do. (Heck she's lived 15 years longer than they thought she would when she was born) She's the one that gets upset when her grades aren't where she wants them to be. If she brings home a 'B' when she's been getting an 'A' she has a panic attack. We've always asked if she tried her hardest, that if she has than we are happy.
Anyway, just needed to get that out. Monday morning I will be going into the school to talk with the guidance councilor about this teacher (from the feeling in the room when we have an IEP and that teacher is there, I don't think anyone likes her.) I don't expect her to move DD#1 from the class this late inthe year but I just want to get it out there so that they can keep DD#1 out of her class next year. Poor kid deserves a fun Senior year after going through high school TWICE! Trying to talk to this teacher is like trying to talk to a perverbial brick wall. Oh and please don't start about her being a snowflake. DD#1 is far from a snowflake LOL... Ask and I will happily tell you about some of the things she's done. Thanks again for reading, sorry it got so long.