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what have u experienced?

Posted by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:22 AM
  • 10 Replies

I have not been on cm for quite some time. My now 18 yo dd moved out of our home 6 months ago, graduated high-school in Dec early and is going into the Marines end of January.She has had MUCH chaos with the roommates she has had (their apartment was searched by cops and one roommate flew the coop and left out of state before the cops got him but another roommate they found drug paraphernalia in his room and marijuana and he has already had his first court case, awaiting his next one, the other roommate had an alcohol problem and went into rehab but came out 2 weeks ago and is drinking again (but trying to control it) Hope it works... but doubtful. I could go on and on but sure hope the service wakes her up and makes her 'fly right'. Anyone else have a kid move out so soon and have such dilemmas?

by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:22 AM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:41 AM
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My oldest moved in with a boyfriend when she was 21.  They broke up 14 months after they moved in.  They dated a year before they moved in together.  

I hope she picks better friends from now on.  

FYI my son in law is an active duty Marine in Hawaii.  

suzeebloch
by Ronna on Jan. 13, 2017 at 9:50 AM
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Hi cat, and welcome to MWAK!

Long story short (I really should be working right now!!) my daughter is now 36 and has finally "settled down".

but our problems started when she was about 14 - drugs, sex, pregnancy scares, running away from home, etc.  When she turned 18, she refused to clean the house after she had had a party while  was out of town and so moved out.  She moved in/out until she turned 26!  In trouble with the law for DUI, lost her DL for a year, spent a week in jail, horrible with keeping jobs, spending money, maxxed out credit cards - oh wait, this was supposed to be long story short!   She finally settled down in her early 30s but not until after a couple of suicide "attempts" when she and her BF would get drunk and have a fight.  They are still together, actually.  He was in jail for over a year from DUI.  They still drink but stay home to do so now.  He has taken over her bills/finances.  At 36, she is finally doing a lot better and the two of us are actually pretty close.  She has apologized numerous times to me in the last couple of years for all her bad behavior as a teen/young adult and thanks me over and over for not giving up.

So ... hang in there!  Time had a wonderful effect on my daughter!  There is hope and a light at the end of the tunnel.

Cenedra64
by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 3:31 PM
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I haven't had probs with my kids and drugs *knock on wood*  But I have been through a rough spell (putting it mildly) with my oldest a few months ago.   we've been reconciling lately. 

Kimmybabe
by Silver Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 4:48 PM
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Welcome to our corner of the cafe!!!

Hopefully, the Marines will be able to give her stability and improve her as they often do.  

kuntrylady56
by Platinum Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 7:03 PM
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Welcome to the group,Cat. My daughter started doing drugs and running with kids older then her, got kicked out of school for drinking,then she wanted to quit but the principle actually worked with her and she ended in a alternative school and got her diploma.  But has been a hard time since then with no jobs, the wrog guys, getting preganant at 18 and not ready, I have custody of my granddaughter and she will be twelve in June. DD is still in abad relationship and has two more children,the guy she is with is not the best type of person.But she is trying and has held a job now for over two years and is overnight manager so am proud of her for that. So yep, been there and did that.lol


jabs54
by Jeanine on Jan. 13, 2017 at 8:38 PM

Yikes.   She's lucky she wasnt accused of having drugs too.   I always told my kids to be careful who you hang out with.   Good luck to her in the Marines!

Marinefranksmom
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 11:23 PM
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No, but my son is a Marine, now a veteran.  He didn't have these dilemmas, he lived home and went to college for 2 years and then left for boot camp.  He was 20 and a great kid, but needed direction and maturity, and he got that an more in the Marine Corps.  He was an MP, deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan.  In his last year just before he deployed, he met and married his wife.  They had their first child when he got back, and when his active service ended, he became a police officer.  Life in the military is not easy, but it's an experience that will last a lifetime.  I wish your daughter good luck.

stepof5
by Silver Member on Jan. 14, 2017 at 6:35 PM
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Hello and welcome back. We have had problems with some of our kids taking on too much at a young age and moving out Time has helped and one is doing fine now. The other two are still not hanging out with the best influences and still going through things. I have heard great things about the military and how it can help individuals find direction and "shape up" so to speak. I hope it goes well for her.
cat4458
by New Member on Jan. 15, 2017 at 10:29 AM

I know, that's exactly what I thought. Birds of a feather, flock together... She worked with 2 of the guys that got caught. One slinked his way back out of state so they couldn't come after him and the other stayed and went to court... The other one went to rehab but is drinking 'just a bit'she says. It's a slippery slope, I would think! Some learn the hard way and some NEVER do. She is learning by watching, I hope. So far so good, she has done stupid stuff but not illegal. Sure hope being in the service makes her stronger yet.



Quoting jabs54:

Yikes.   She's lucky she wasnt accused of having drugs too.   I always told my kids to be careful who you hang out with.   Good luck to her in the Marines!


cat4458
by New Member on Jan. 15, 2017 at 10:32 AM

That's great she's held down a job & she's learning through 'hard knocks'



Quoting kuntrylady56:

Welcome to the group,Cat. My daughter started doing drugs and running with kids older then her, got kicked out of school for drinking,then she wanted to quit but the principle actually worked with her and she ended in a alternative school and got her diploma.  But has been a hard time since then with no jobs, the wrog guys, getting preganant at 18 and not ready, I have custody of my granddaughter and she will be twelve in June. DD is still in abad relationship and has two more children,the guy she is with is not the best type of person.But she is trying and has held a job now for over two years and is overnight manager so am proud of her for that. So yep, been there and did that.lol


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