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40ish and beyond... 40ish and beyond...

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So Tayler comes home from day care tonight with 2 bite marks on him! The 1st was on the back of his arm and the other on his back!! I called his provider and she says "the kids take toys from her Grand daughter so she bites to retaliate!!! She is also a 3yr old!! I get it that Tayler shouldn't take her toys but her biting makes me mad!! A 3yr old is old enough to use her words and not bite am I right??? To make things worse his provider DIDN'T know that he was bit!! I asked T if he said anything or cried he said "NO I am a big boy I didn't cry!!" Any ideas on getting her to stop??

***UPDATE***

The child bit AGAIN..And her Mother decided to pull her!! SHE (as well as the rest of us) were concerned for all of our kids!! So no need to worry EVERY time I drop off Tayler!!!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jun. 15, 2012 at 5:55 PM
Replies (11-17):
javamom12
by Bronze sister on Jun. 15, 2012 at 7:56 PM
1 mom liked this
I would think about looking for a new provider..
sunflowers12
by Silver sister on Jun. 15, 2012 at 9:33 PM
Put some vicks on his arm it won't hurt him or her if she gets him again.. but its supposed to be a big no no in day cares biting or hurting others... Regardless if she is a grand or not same rules for everyone... You child's safety is just as important if not more because I am sure you pay for him to be there... The grand may just be there... Just saying if its not for paying customers you won't have an income probably need to wrap their minds around that one.. unless the got the daycare market cornered... Hope things get better..
valleymomma1
by Bronze sister on Jun. 16, 2012 at 1:20 PM
That looks sore the bitter needs constant supervision by an adult to step in and mediate & redirect her so she does not escalate & bite that is definetly a behavior not to be taken lightly by the grand mom.
Ms.KitKat
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 1:34 PM

Biting is tough thing. as the "victim" you might think the biter is old enough to use her words but then again- she IS only 3. and if she was able to use her words effectively- she would have done so. It is also a learned behavior to some degree. She bit a kid once and the kid stopped doing what ever was annoying her. The next time another kid crossed her boundaries- she bit again and that kid stopped. see the pattern the biter is learning?

It is a shame that your DS kept quiet. He really did "take it like a man"  But chances are- he won't be taking any of HER toys away from her again.

Best case scenerio- the caregiver must address the situation right then and there. This girl needs to learn that it is not acceptable. But up to this point- her biting has been a very effective tool for her.

None of my kids were biters. I contribute this to the following story: each of my 3 kids did bite me when they were toddlers- 13 months-ish or so. My first I recall very distinctly. I was carrying him in my arms, he was on my hip and his chin was resting on my shoulder. He chomped down with his little baby teeth so hard on my shoulder I SHREIKED in such pain and nearly dropped him. At first I thought I was stung by a wasp. AUGH! the PAIN! I looked at my shoulder and saw the bite mark and verbally reprimanded my DS.

He was so frightened by my reaction- he never bit again. He was not being malicious I don;t think. He just wanted to give a little bite. He learned not to do THAT again.

You would have thought I learned my lesson by the time baby #2 and #3 came along but I did not. They each tried to take a chunk out of me and each time I shreiked. It was just enough to scare them and to learn it was not worth the reward.

 

bella1492
by Sister on Jun. 16, 2012 at 4:59 PM

Does the "one free bite" rule apply to daycare providers children (or grandchildren) just like it does for dogs?

Actually for me it wouldn't. I'd FIRE her arse, and just for her nonchalant reply I'd report her to whatever state licensing agency is applicable. I used to do a home daycare and I would be tripping over my tongue apologizing for one of my kids pinching another even if it left no mark whatsoever. There is simply no excuse for that woman's response to this situation.

redlady125
by Silver sister on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:33 PM

NO BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN DOING THIS ,HOW SHE DIDNT NO JUST BECAUSE HE DIDNT CRY THERE WAS SOME KIND OF FUSS ,I WORK WITH CHILDREN AND THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING TO MAKE U LOOK OVER AT THE KIDS ,MAKE SURE U CLEAN IT

Poed0216
by Sister on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:43 PM
Those are really bad bites. I can't believe he didn't even cry . That's crazy that it went unnoticed . I guess I would be really concerned about what else the caregiver is missing?
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