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40ish and beyond... 40ish and beyond...

Reality Check For My 12 YO

Posted by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 1:12 AM
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Ok, so my 12 year old daughter thinks she going to a "Halloween Party" with her group of girlfriends from middle school to a hotel.

Uh-huh. 12. To a Hotel.


Here are my problems with it, and you tell me if my radar is off:

1) The hosting girl is new to the "group"; I've never heard her name before now, and I've never met the parents, but she says the parents will be there;

2) The designated hotel is 35+ miles away, tho I have no idea yet what hotel;

3) They plan to watch Friday The 13th.


My husband is currently camping with our younger one, so we can't really talk about it. The sleepover isn't for a couple of weeks yet, so we will have time to talk about it. He's much more "relaxed" in his parenting than I am. Bottom line, though, if Mama says "no" it's no!

Apparently my daughter is THE ONLY ONE (insert drama) who isn't allowed to watch super gory, scary movies, and she's THE ONLY ONE who goes to bed as early as she does....Blah Blah Blah...Is she the ONLY ONE who has parents who actually parent her?! LOL! 

So. Am I way off the mark? Or would you say Uh, Hell NO! too?

by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 1:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
jett286
by BrewMisstress on Oct. 14, 2012 at 1:48 AM

Hell NO!  Is what I would have told my boys.  They were not even allowed to spend the night at friends house if we didn't know them.  The only way I could even imagine allowing this is if we were to go with and have  a room down the hall.  and then it would only be if they could handle the movie.  With our boys we were much more concerned about sexual content than scary/gory and then only when they were old enough to handle it and that is different for each kid.

Good luck with this one and let us know what you end up doing..

Jeanette

"Love is a fabric that never fades, no matter how often it is washed in the waters of adversity and grief". -- Anon.
cuteoverload
by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 2:02 AM

No

AndrewsMomPDX
by Christine on Oct. 14, 2012 at 3:09 AM
3 moms liked this

 I'm not the strictest or most lenient parent, but it would be contingent upon me knowing the parents, exactly who is going to be there and what type of supervision they are going to have. There are just too many variables to this situation. My gut instinct is it is a bad idea unless the other parents put you at ease.

pasteeater
by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 4:25 AM
I wouldn't allow it. Even if I knew the parents. No way.
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dana63
by Momma of 40ish on Oct. 14, 2012 at 5:22 AM
2 moms liked this

 My first impression was why would a parent spend the money for young girls to spend the night to watch scary movies without an adult present? What happen to a simple small party at a child house and maybe a movie or two? When my kids were younger me and a few parents would do this and sat in the other room. You would be surprise how many came out just to"talk" during the scary scenes. 

But all in all I wouldnt allow it either...

omamabean
by Bronze sister on Oct. 14, 2012 at 8:15 AM
Thanks, ladies!
I knew I wasn't off my rocker!
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maryg38
by Sweet Mary <3 on Oct. 14, 2012 at 8:21 AM
No means no, like you if I don't know the parents then the girls stay home.
Hugs for Sticking with your gut instinct
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SuDeNym
by Sister on Oct. 14, 2012 at 10:07 AM

I would say "No" to the hotel.  If it was the same set of circumstances, but being held at one of the girls home, maybe; a hotel, no freaking way....

Perhaps a compromise - since she can not go to the party at the hotel, could you offer to host, at a later date, a sleepover at your house and allow (for this special occasion) a scary movie (I'd go more for classics, "The Birds" is still pretty darn scary).

SuDeNym
by Sister on Oct. 14, 2012 at 10:10 AM
1 mom liked this

Quote:


Apparently my daughter is THE ONLY ONE (insert drama) who isn't allowed to watch super gory, scary movies, and she's THE ONLY ONE who goes to bed as early as she does....Blah Blah Blah...Is she the ONLY ONE who has parents who actually parent her?! LOL!
When my niece was in HS, she complained to me that her nickname with friends was "Strict" because her dad didn't let her do ANYTHING the other kids could.  I told her "Awesome nickname.  Tells me that your dad loves you and wants you safe."
RubyQ
by Gold sister on Oct. 14, 2012 at 10:21 AM

 The fact that the parents would plan this kind of outing for 12 year olds to begin with would cause me to cast doubt on their judgement. Conditioning kids to look at hotels as great places to party isn't my idea of teaching kids how to go about having a social life. And if they aren't making sound plans for their daughter, what makes me think they'll make sound ones for mine when i'm not there?

 When my kids gave me the old tired whine of, "But, everyone else's parents are letting their kids do it!!"  I simply thanked my children for letting me know who the fools are. Consequently, they learned quickly not to use that guilt trip with me.



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