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40ish and beyond... 40ish and beyond...

Let's break the cycle of bullying

Posted by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:31 AM
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6 moms liked this

 This is topic that we are hearing more and more of. Bullies can be anyone but mainly it is teenage girls from the age of 11-17. This type of behavior has to stop. How do you stop the mean girls (or any bully)?

First parents need to get inolved because if they know what their child is doing then maybe they can stop it before it gets out of hand. Parents should NOT be the child's friend BUT BE A PARENT! If the child is being a bully don't think its cute and contribute to it, act on it and get involved to stop your child.

Most kids that are being bullied will withdrawl socially and their sleep pattern will be off. They will become depressed and some might stop eating, and cry and beg to stay home. Listen to any signs that is not typical of your child.

Most that are bullies are doing it to wound that persons self esteem and could be either being bullied at home by their own family member and so they will want someone to hurt as bad as they do or they want to feel power over that (or other) person.

If your child is a victim of being bullied take a stand and if your child is the bully dont sit back and allow it because it is making them popular or "queen" of the school. Take a stand and be active in your child's life and know what your child is doing before it is too late..

Let's break the cycle of bullying before its too late..

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by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:31 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Mariagma3
by Wild Midwest Lady on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:33 AM

 I couldn't agree more! It's very scary, so sad!!

dana63
by Momma of 40ish on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:41 AM
1 mom liked this

 My sons were the victim of racial bullying and I took a stand and even told the school I would sue if they didnt put a stop to it. After the boys who were doing this got educated on what a bully was they all became friends with my sons and we had no more problems. But in todays society bullying is getting worse and it seems like the parents say the same thing "my child wouldnt do that!" REALLY parents and you know this why? Have you read your childs social media page? did you dig deeper to make sure they were not being a bully and read all text messages? make sure they dont have a dummy acct to throw you off? How about talking to other students in school? What actions did you really take to make sure your child was not a bully?

Did you all know that 20% of bullies (this is teenagers) will enjoy the thrill of the power and will start being a bully to their parents and siblings and threaten them if they tell? 10% of parents killed by their child is because of the bullying and the parents either tried to take a stand or said something..

Carmen66
by Hot Latina on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:47 AM

 im so glad my kids never had this problem because im a very outspoken and tough mama. i would definitely be at the school and the kids house and put my foot down.

Carmen66
by Hot Latina on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:48 AM
4 moms liked this

 

rzmamma
by Sharon on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:55 AM

I agree, bullying has become an epidemic amongst our kids today. It is so sad to read about the tragic death of a young person who took their own life because they felt it was the only way to escape the bullying. My friend's son had a friend commit suicide by hanging himself because he was being bullied.

Arwyn724
by Bronze sister on Oct. 18, 2013 at 9:59 AM
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Neither of my girls were on social media, (their choice), and although they both had a huge circle of friends, they didn't strive to be in the 'popular' groups. My youngest has stood up against bullying all through school, one of her best friends was a target from middle school onward.  I'm proud of the stand she has taken against some very large, mean groups of girls.  My oldest was bullied twice in a summer camp program when she was really young, but we nipped that in the bud right as it happened.  When they were young, I tried to be very aware of what was going on in their lives, and thank goodness, both of my girls have an amazing sense of self-esteem.  (Watching a single mother struggle to support them all their lives has given them a feeling of female empowerment, so I guess that was a good side-effect of our situation)

Arwyn 724 

lucky2Beeme
by Silver sister on Oct. 18, 2013 at 10:39 AM

I agree it has to stop. I think many parents need to pay more attention to whats going on when their children are toddlers. How they talk and act, what the kids watch on TV. I believe this has an impact on who becomes a bully. Teach your children that NO two kids are alike. Though they may seem it they truly are only similar. teach them that every child is special in their own way. that the boy with the glasses or the girl with a limp, isn't an outcast.  My sons were huge into sports. Thankfully they accepted people for who they were not what they looked like or wore. My sons had and still have many friends that are musicians, actors, nerds. I love them for being so accepting. I feel dh and I must had shown and taught them well.

AndrewsMomPDX
by Christine on Oct. 18, 2013 at 11:03 AM

I agree 100% and it doesn't surprise me one bit that it is done by adolescent girls between 11-17. It's about that age that we start emphasizing looks and material things. We need to teach our dd's to be friends with other girls and not look at them as the competition. I'm also wondering how many parents can be surprised to find out their children are bullies when they say things in the privacy of their own households that uphold many ignorant stereotypes. Compassion should be learned at home so we are raising decent human beings.

MentorMom1
by Gold sister on Oct. 18, 2013 at 12:56 PM

I think kids who are raised without empathy and compassion at home are far more likely to become bullies. I would say stopping the cycle begins with every newborn. When parents meet a child's needs immediately and with love, use nurturing touch, focused attention and eye contact, it shows the child he or she is respected as a human being. 

This type of self-esteem can never be taken away. It becomes part of the child's inherent make up. It even affects his DNA. When children are treated with respect through their growing up years, are shown contingency with their thoughts and ideas, they will never have a need to bully anyone. 

But the problem persists because parents refuse to see that no matter what their own personal needs may be, babies and young childen have different and separate needs. And however difficult it may be to fulfill them, not doing so has permanent consequences for that child, their family and society. 

hau_siyoka
by Doll Baby on Oct. 18, 2013 at 1:00 PM

I think if the parent think before speaking the child may  never meet its first bully...Should they come in contact with one I've always told my children to walk away and when you do that its one less person the bully has on his side...there are no sides...one is right and the other is wrong.

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