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Should I give it up?

Posted by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:41 PM
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Hey ladies,

     I would like you opinion on a group I started. I began a Bunco group about 10 years ago. I started it, because I was new to the area and wanted to make friends. We had so much fun, but in Bunco, you need 12 people, permanent to play. We mostly built up to 10, but have had a few stragglers who would not host or commit to come. Some of them would come when they wanted, and some won't host. I have just try to go with the flow, and tried new things, to get new folks in and we have had a few deaths, which left holes.

     In Sept. of this year, I had 2 (friends) who were also in Bunco, treat me and my husband very poorly on a cruise. I don't like to socialize with these ladies anymore, but have tried to be an adult, and say hi, etc.  I have forgiven them, but can not trust them, again. The issue is we have a few hostesses, maybe 9, and the rest are now all temporary folks, who show up when they want. For the hostesses, I submit a Evite, so all can RSVP, and give the hostess notice they are coming. Some folks still show up without letting anyone know. I missed last Friday, and 6 had RSVP'd and 11 showed up. I am getting so frustrated.

     I am wandering if I should just give up doing Bunco, even though I do all that we need to keep it going. I send out the Evite, and have a list that keep all informed, say someone cancels-like this month. I am afraid if I give it up, one of these not so friends, will take it over, and leave me behind. I put so much work in getting it going, and hate to see someone else glorify over what I have done. I have asked the ladies, if they wanted to continue, since sometimes we only have 6, and they have said they wanted too. I am not enjoying it, like I used too, though it is nice to see some of the old faces at times.

I would appreciate your opinion.

by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mariagma3
by Maria - Midwest Lady on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:44 PM
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 Could you take a break from it for awhile?

RoseWall
by RoseWall on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:46 PM
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I say give it up.
maybe find another interest.
hugs
have you already searched online for established Bunco groups nearby?
RoseWall
by RoseWall on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:47 PM
I said give it up because your fun activity should not cause you additional stress.
homecare71
by Sister on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:47 PM

I am sitting out for 2 games, as I have had family coming, and have been out of town. We don't have a hostess for Sept., so don't expect to be going until Oct., if then. That may be the thing to do, but I still need to do the Evite, etc.

RoseWall
by RoseWall on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:49 PM
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I do think you should begin doing another activity versus doing nothing at all.
so start the new activities before you close down the old group. their should be a slight overlap while you transition to your new fun group/ activity.
RoseWall
by RoseWall on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:51 PM
1 mom liked this
sending positive energy your way.
hugs
homecare71
by Sister on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:55 PM

I have become involved in golf and yoga, but am trying hard to meet new friends. I had tried looking up local Bunco groups, before I started this one, and no one hear knew what it was. It has bee a great accomplishment, as we have had many years of a good time, and dealt wtih 3 deaths, from our group, and had lots of fun. It has now gotten too a bit of gossiping, etc, and I don't like this. I have tried to keep it positive, but now, we have one lady, who one of the so called friends invited, and I had asked her not to do it, but she did anyway, and this lady has lots of issues, and she only comes for a short while. I do believe she is an alcoholic, because I got so many complaints about her. It is making Bunco, no so fun.

Thanks for your opinions. I am trying to get involved in other things.

doodlepuss
by Sheri on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:23 PM
Could you keep the good ones and find something that wouldn't require so many people?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
BL2010
by BL on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:04 PM

I was going to suggest the same as doodle... Is it possible to find fill-in for those few that are ruining it for the rest of you?

Maybe talk to the "regular" ladies and see what they think.

RoseWall
by RoseWall on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:41 PM
now that's a great idea!

Quoting doodlepuss: Could you keep the good ones and find something that wouldn't require so many people?
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