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40ish and beyond... 40ish and beyond...

Update: give me your advice on how to handle this Teacher!

Posted by on Aug. 27, 2014 at 8:57 PM
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My DS is in middle school and while in class his teacher walked up to him and snatched his glasses off of his face and got real close and said in a loud voice "I Don't allow sunglasses in my room!" He had on transition lenses that darken if sitting near a sunny window, which he was. The whole class was calm, no disruption, no problems everyone was reading.  He tried to tell her about the glasses but she told him to sit down and read his book! He was  embarrassed/humiliated so he sat quietly and looked down until class was over and when he asked for the glasses back she said their mine until the end of the year!  she was grading papers and when he said they are prescription glasses  she said nice try and dismissed him to his next class. luckily our neighbor next door (cute little sassy blond) said "put them to your eyes he,s practically blind" to the teacher.  the Teacher did and had her give him his glasses. NO apology the next day in class but she did not tell him to remove them again either. 

I heard about it from our Neighbor later the next day, her daughter told her. I asked DS was that why he was so quite the last couple of days? and he asked me not to make a big deal she (teacher) already doesn't like him.  I asked why? and he said she don't like the brown kids (he is the only AA kid in class  and 1 of maybe10 at the school)... What would you do? I want to beat this B*&^%  @$$!!!!! but don't want to be THAT MOM!

If i told my husband he would flip out on her. My DS is Biracial and has never experienced something like this before. Please help me avoid being in the news for kicking a teachers ASS! what do you suggest?

Thank you for all of your responses! I was seeing red and was not going to react positively.

What she did was the talk of the school and apperently some homes too. A few more parents also called to inform me of the situation. My DS is very polite and respectful so they knew something wierd was going on there. 

I emailed the Teacher and had a meeting with her and my son together yesterday.

She was defensive at first explaining her zero tolerance policy for breaking school rules blah blah blah, but did admit that she had crossed the line.  My son told her he felt humiliated and scared when the incident happened.  She tried to explain again she was only controlling her class but i interrupted and mentioned  that we all know, no one at school should ever put hands on other people possessions or bodies. Soon after that point I told DS to go outside the room and i talked alone with the teacher. I explained that i would be taking the issue to the principle and superintendent if we could not resolve it here and now.  My son was assaulted and deserved an apology and should never be treated like that again. I was calm and i think that scared her more than if i were irate.  She went out to him. brought him back into the class to apologized and give him a hug. I don't know if it was sincere (i hope it was) but it sure made my son feel better and i feel better too. 

I have my little spy-girl in the class so I will know if retaliation is happening. 

 My heart was broken when i fould out and I was ready to strike out.. Your suggestion made me laugh ,think and finally do the right thing.

I am now ready for a wonderful rest of the school year!

clappingThanks again!

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.  ~Peter De Vries

Proud Mom to Chase

Welly

by on Aug. 27, 2014 at 8:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Silver sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:11 PM
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GO straight to the Principal.Pass Go & do not stop to collect your $200. That bitch needs to be put in her place. She was WAY OUT OF LINE !!! My heart breaks for your son.

coolmommy2x
by Silver sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:13 PM
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I suggest calming down. You don't know for a fact that the teacher singled him out because he's bi-racial, those were your son's words and he's mad at her (understandably). I suggest calmly asking her what happened in class (email or phonecall) and politely saying that you appreciate her understanding how his glasses work. If it continues, I'd go to the principal but I wouldn't go in guns blazing.
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wildchild.com
by Rapunzel on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:14 PM
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I agree what a total bitch!

Quoting lucky2Beeme:

GO straight to the Principal.Pass Go & do not stop to collect your $200. That bitch needs to be put in her place. She was WAY OUT OF LINE !!! My heart breaks for your son.

1squishysmom
by Silver sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:14 PM
2 moms liked this

 Our son is legally blind without his glasses. I would be LIVID! How dare she? I would be THAT mom! My ass would be in that office the very next day, talking to the principal. That is inexcusable!

wenuck
by Moonshine on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:15 PM
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I'd be going straight to the school and find out what the Hell is going on.
Delawhere
by Sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:18 PM
1 mom liked this

Do you have an email address for the teacher? I see nothing wrong with letting the teacher know that you are aware of the situation.  You don't have to go batsh*t on her but you can let her know how badly she made your son feel & how he was too intimidated to speak up for himself. Your son is just a kid and he needs you to still be his advocate.  At the very least, the teacher will know that you are watching & may watch her behaviour towards your son more.  Plus if it does escalate in anyway in the future, you got an email.  Good luck.

GwenMB
by Sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:20 PM

I agree with this.  Calmly talk to the teacher first & find out her version (kids don't always get it right). It's also possible the teacher is mad at him for something else, some small thing he did the first day or something.

Quoting coolmommy2x: I suggest calming down. You don't know for a fact that the teacher singled him out because he's bi-racial, those were your son's words and he's mad at her (understandably). I suggest calmly asking her what happened in class (email or phonecall) and politely saying that you appreciate her understanding how his glasses work. If it continues, I'd go to the principal but I wouldn't go in guns blazing.


Mariagma3
by Wild Midwest Lady on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:33 PM

 AWW! Your poor kid! That really infuriates me!! There is NO reason why she shouldn't like your son, just because he is bi-racial. I would call the teacher and explain to her about the glasses. If she doesn't listen to you, (she may not) call the principal. Or you could call his counselor, and explain things to him/her. I know your son doesn't want you making a fuss. But, if you don't, he probably is too shy to speak for himself. I had to go to bat for my son at this age. He didn't like it, but the problem ended. Good luck to you. I have 2 nieces, and 1 nephew that are bi-racial.

**I wanted to add: You may want to or have to explain to her about transitions lenses. she should know about them, they're everywhere. My main point is that she understands that your son is not trying to get away  with wearing sunglasees in class. (or inside. I wonder if she understands that part of these glasses?)

Wellygrrl
by Sister on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:38 PM

i wanted to go in guns hot but know it won't help the situation. If she is unreasonalble then i'll speak with the principal. i just need to calm down. 

Quoting lucky2Beeme:

GO straight to the Principal.Pass Go & do not stop to collect your $200. That bitch needs to be put in her place. She was WAY OUT OF LINE !!! My heart breaks for your son.


BL2010
by BL on Aug. 27, 2014 at 9:39 PM
3 moms liked this

Hi and welcome to the group. I'm bl.

First take a deep breath and try to relax. I think you definitely need to go to the school, in person, and speak to the principal and the teacher.

That is so wrong if she did it because she doesn't like brown people, as he put it. It makes me wonder if something else has happened that he's thinking like that.

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